Where's the ticket booth for this amusement ride?

Oh, and kudos for Mandingo's statement on tomboys.  One can get in on the ground floor before they realize they're lesbian or go into software engineering. 

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

themushroomyou can get tickets for the 3 cockring circus at the booth next to the human cannon baller

themushroomif you're too late, that's not that bad either, cause then you can get them to lay kitchen tile or adjust your carburetor

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what if nigger meant kite

mandingo

I've always loved the human cannon baller, except for that time he had the flue and the strongman filled in for him.

mandingo

Totally honest, it was a butch-looking woman named Ginger (at Lowe's) who taught me how to lay tile. She was excellent.

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

ITS NOT NICE TO MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE FOR AGE, RACE, GENDER, RELIGION, AND SEXUAL ORIANTATION!! YOU WOULDNT SAY BLACK PEOPLE ARE DUMB WOULD YOU???

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WRESTLING IS NOT FAKE!

Not while they're within earshot.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

lobsterturtle

Nice, probably not. But Don Rickles was not exactly famous for being nice.

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"He was cursed with a horrorshow of a face, like Guiseppe Archbold doing a study of mollusk tumors."

No mention of hair color. Let the blonde jokes commence!

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

How about spelling? Can we make fun of people for spelling?

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

And for screaming at ppl with the caps lock on.

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Rabid_Weasle

 Man boobies! 

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

lobsterturtle

It's not nice to fool Mother Nature *bwam!* either.

lobsterturtle

Some things don't need to be expressed out loud. 

Caps-lock.  It's what people are pressing. 

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

NooniePuuBunny

Man boobies!

Wanna go make out in my van?

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Poop.

lobsterturtle

 agreed

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The Greatest Strip Ever Made

Woman, can't live with them......can't shoot them!

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Another Day...Another Dollar......Another Day To Walk On Water

raise your hand if you tried to click on that link

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what if nigger meant kite

I DID BUT ONLY AFTER I RED YOUR POST...JUST TO MAKE SURE. WHAT IF NIGGER MEANT FOUR LEAF CLOVER. WHAT THEN MANDINGO?

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obscenity filter is off

Rabid_Weasle

Man boobies!

Wanna go make out in my van?

Not with you.

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/

 I just bought this book three days ago. It's a really fun read.

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"No obscene images." I guess I'll just have to settle for saying cocksucker a lot.

   We have this waitress at work who is a total (hot) alcoholic. Every night we floor hosts have to sit around not getting paid to wait for her to finish her job, i.e. cleaning her section, doing her tabs, etc etc. This generally takes 45 minutes to an hour and a half.

   So anyway, the whole time she's trying to drunkenly clean up her section, she complains about how she didn't make any money and how much people suck for not tipping her. The fact of the matter is that there are a couple of regulars the always sit in her section and constantly buy her shots to see how fucked up they can get her. So while she's chugging down shots and talking about blond idiot bullshit, the rest of the customers in her section (tho ones NOT buying her shots) get really shitty service and therefore, like most people, don't tip her well at all.

   We've tried to point this out to her many times, but nothing is ever her fault. She is as sharp as a wet bag of mice.

   When God made her He said "Well you're gonna be dumb as fuck, but the good part is it won't make any difference..."

   Yeah. Women are dumb.

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Kill Whitey.

Okay, here's my wimmin iz dum story, and curiously this does not apply to just one person because I can think of three times (at least) I've been the victim of this.  I was reminded of this by someone on Flickr the other day who would be number four-or-so if I lived 3000 miles and fifteen years closer.

There's a guy, let's call him Guy, and a girl, let's call her Contessa Cluelessa.  Guy and Contessa are friendly to each other, talk a bunch, and share plenty.  To the point, as happens, where she blubbers all over him regularly about how the man she has a big emotional investment in doesn't give a flying fuck that she exists.  The object of her affections already has interests/a girlfriend/a spouse/a boyfriend or simply doesn't want to get any of her sticky emotional ectoplasm on him.  Textbook one-sided relationship in her life.  So after being a neutered supportive Guy for long enough, he hints to her that she should stop chasing after that man who could give a shit about her, and try becoming interested in guys who actually do acknowledge her, appreciate her, like her, and have an interest in her.  Such as this Guy right here, who has spent a rediculous amount of time listening to her bitch about how she can't find love.  Is her reaction to say, "golly, I've been overlooking something that's right in front of me all along?"  Of course not.  Her reaction is to move away from the only person who can put up with her.  

...sharp as a wet bag of mice?  I heart you, AA. 

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Say something cryptic then leave snickering.

I have seen the role reversal of your Guy and Contessa story. Which only ends in tragedy and me shouting "Look! A Girl!" at Guy to distract him from the object of his affections sticking her tongue down Dude Attabar's throat.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

Women are dumb, but men suck.  The big one.  Well, all the men in my life suck (except mandingo).  Well, maybe mandingo sucks, I'm not at all sure.  He's not really in my life irl.  We'd have to ask Kathy.  But then Kathy's a woman, so we'll get a dumb answer.  Hmmm...

   : /

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

pita

Actually, some of us lick.

(insert rim shot here)

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I has a flavor!

Women are crazy because men are assholes.

Men are assholes because women are crazy.

THAT... is the sound of one hand clapping.

I will say this though, in defense of "Cluelessa"... I've been the Guy in that scenario, and I stopped being the Guy in that scenario, the moment I saw things from the opposite angle. See, men like to project this idealized image of what a woman SHOULD be looking for, onto the women they desire. Basically, it works like this: Guy sees a woman he likes, and falls for her, probably for no other reason than she's pretty and she likes one of the bands or TV shows that Guy likes. Suddenly she's everything Guy has always wanted, whether she actually is or not. And since, in Guy's mind, she's perfect in every way, well, then CERTAINLY she's looking for a nice Guy who will respect her feelings (even though Guy admits that he doesn't understand or condone them), listen to her spill her guts (even though Guy will complain about how much he hates having to do this), and be there for her (which Guy is only doing for reasons he himself isn't making clear to his object of affection).

And then, when Guy finally reveals his true feelings (read: reveals himself to not be what he has been presenting himself as for weeks/months/years, to a person who has trusted him with personal information), Guy is genuinely surprised when Contessa recoils in shock.

It was this realization that made my nuts drop. So now, I know that if you really like a girl, you should probably tell her BEFORE she starts trusting you with her emotional baggage.

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"He was cursed with a horrorshow of a face, like Guiseppe Archbold doing a study of mollusk tumors."

However, Z, in my experience, said women are often heard to say to said men: "I wish my boyfriend were just like you."

Therefore, women are dumb. Men are just as dumb for putting up with that shit.

In fact, we are all dumb all over.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.