Batman: hai frank_
frank_: :O
frank_: dcom!
frank_: whats up dcom?
choad: half of frankston
frank_: :(
Batman: (not at the same time)
choad: i've got a million of them
choad: actually, only about 1400 so far
Humbert_Rohypnol: I've often said, "no one can exploit a missing comma like chaod."
choad: you should see what i can do with a colon
cpausti: HHAAAAAAAA!

[21:54] choady: okay...do i work out, or do i organize my travel pics?
[21:55] IvyThePlant: if you work out, we need pics
[21:55] choady: i lost weight despite all the crap i ate over there
[21:55] choady: but i was burning like 1200+ calories a day
[21:56] choady: and now my legs are super sexy
[21:56] choady: like even i cant stop staring at them
[21:56] * IvyThePlant whistles
[21:56] choady: i might have to masturbate thinking of my own legs tonight

choady: kajun, did any of your parents whore around vienna?
Kajun: uh
Kajun: why?
choady: because i thought my waiter looked a lot like you, and then when i was settling the bill, i saw his name was also thomas
choady: he had the same hair colour and style and glasses
Kajun: well, if he's anything like me, I hope you didn't order the soup

[00:33] the only time I would ever consider a tit-fuck, is if I was going to take a picture on my phone and show it around the office
[00:33] or if I was fucking a mate's sister/mum, just to tell them I tit-fucked her.
[00:33] and that she was shite
[00:34] and paid me
[00:34] and it wasn't worth the money
[00:34] and all the time I was imagining his dad
[00:34] because he's got bigger tits

---
Poo perhaps?

Kajun: I have no penis.
boorite: omg what happened to your beautiful penis which I had every intention of sucking
boorite: lewl
Kajun: I lost it in a hand of poker.
Kajun: to a pair of Queens
boorite: lewl
boorite: I sprained mine with four Jacks
Kajun: lewl
Kajun: that's ace
boorite: I was flush with embarrassment
Kajun: royally
boorite: damn straight.
Kajun: you're such a joker

---
Dad was flammable

you got off easy. i've been broken by a couple of tens

---
what if nigger meant kite

Global messages from the IRCops

[21:22] -Global- Oh no! My penis fell off!
-
[21:23] -Global- try to reattach it with superglue!

In #SC

[21:22] The IRCops are fun here, makes a change.
[21:24] Heh, global conversing.

IRCops global #sc specifically

[21:28] -Global:#stripcreator- This just in h|barbobot likes da cock and dirty hobos

So I guess IRCops can be cool.

---
Poo perhaps?

fucking flies.
they're doing my tits in
I feel like a giant turd.

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

[15:43] artemis: Ive herad the best way to get the job is through either oral sex or amazing credentials
[15:44] IvyThePlant: and my credentials kinda suck
[15:44] IvyThePlant: so does my oral sex technique, now that i think about it
[15:44] cpausti: :|
[15:44] artemis: do you have a knot on the back of your head from where it hits the desk?
[15:45] Kajun: I miss oral sex
[15:46] cpausti: :|
[15:46] Kajun: I wonder what I can smear on my genitals to entice the missus
[15:46] artemis: peanut butter
[15:46] cpausti: money
[15:46] Kajun: I'm not sure she likes peanut butter
[15:46] IvyThePlant: i'll go with money
[15:46] artemis: dont want her getting fat, anyway
[15:46] Kajun: money, you say?
[15:46] cpausti: peanut butter first, so the money sticks
[15:46] artemis: atkins approved spread
[15:46] Kajun: okay, I'll jam a pound coin down there
[15:46] artemis: have it hidden in your urethra
[15:46] artemis: as a special surprise
[15:47] cpausti: ooooh.\
[15:47] Kajun: yes
[15:47] Kajun: SURPRISE, THERE GO YOUR TONSILS!
[15:47] cpausti: make sure she doesn't choke
[15:47] Jes_L: mercy
[15:48] artemis: you just need to rationalize with her
[15:48] Kajun: please, artemis, we're trying to have a grown-up discussion here

Pioneering the world of AIM conversations in this thread, it's a comic based on a conversation between me and mandingo!

They brought an apple, I brought a protective cup by areallystupidguy 8-08-05

so, what can you tell me about your childhood? it was terrible. i was bullied constantly and harshly. i was even beaten up eight times in the second grade alone! wow...that's a lot. i survived. but damn, eight times? where were the teachers? beating me up.

---
It's grime time.

that guy on the left is sex E

---
what if nigger meant kite

boorite's still going over 100, despite the lounge music
must be the fondling
HAHA!
"How much do you love me?", "One Dollar schmucko"
this calls for reverse psychology
he just got pulled over again!
same place
he's so fucked
in both senses
yup
tell the cop I said he's got previous form
'Same place' as in 'same car'
DIFFERENT CAR, SAME PALKCE
damn caps
'cops'
that too
same police?
not the same cop, that one was at night
ivy donut read toosmart
it is night honey. Take the spunk out of your eyes
maybe in whatever backwater timezone YOU live in
haw
how dare u slag off frenwich mean time
* IvyDaPlant prepares herself to have to pick boorite up from jail in 24 hours
grenwich
sandwich
Is this bollocks
i shouldn't have been fondling him so much
show the cop my comics
right, like we need any more reason to get sent upriver
you should have pulled over and given him one
horny people in front seat cause accidents
yup
accidents in back seats cause children
yes yes
* Jes_L gets his coat
go on
we just cause tickets
get out
* Jes_L is now known as Jes_AFK
yule get a mark on joor lisnce
or a cum spain
and possibly jail time thanks to that last ticket
votever
or cum stains, whichever works for you
Boorite The Outlaw
Boorite the Cum-Stained Outlaw
he also got ticketed for not using his turn signal when changing lanes
and the cop just spit on the ground
land of the free
lick it up
essex cops would have called you a pussy for indicating
haw
* Jes_AFK is now known as Jes_AFK_PUB
I'll be back shortly
ooooh...apparently they no longer send people to jail for going over 100 mph
they would have called you "Mr. la-de-da"
which means the cop that other night was really just trying to scare us
or was a rat bastard
la-de-bloody-da
oh good, he set cruise control so i can still fondle him
If this was an episode of Frasier you could have bet your bottom dollar it was Martin who arranged this whole thing
that would make sense if i every bothered to see Frasier
now he's fondling me
should i call the police?

Oh, man, this exchange was hilarious:

-:- Connected to irc.chatjunkies.org
-:- Notice from server: AUTH :*** Looking up your hostname...
-:- Notice from server: AUTH :*** Checking Ident
-:- Notice from server: AUTH :*** Found your hostname
-:- Notice from server: AUTH :*** No Ident response
-:- Notice from us.chatjunkies.org: *** G-lined
-:- Notice from us.chatjunkies.org: *** Banned sepehr (2005/9/7 21.23)
-:- Error: :Closing Link: dialup-4.154.53.105.Dial1.Atlanta1.Level3.net (*** Banned )

Me, banned? :(

---
Chicken Feather Bed Bugs Bunny Hop Sing Out Side Street Walker Texas Ranger Cookie Dough Boy Wonder Years

I get the same thing when I try to join.

---
Poop.

It's been working fine all night...
*** #stripcreator: choady kaufman cpausti knkx mkilly

*** Joins: Chicka [~Stripper@ppp-70-246-135-71.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net] has joined #stripcreator -:- Topic for #stripcreator is: Ray: You're poison, Ivy.
?
*** Joins: KajunUSA [~Stripper@ppp-70-246-135-71.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net] has joined #stripcreator
Is Tommy there?
Ah
Speak of the cunt
and he shall appear
OMG WTF!
Are you drunk?
Jetlagged?
One down one more to kidnap
You know, the security at the airport is getting pretty laid back
Chicka loves a good frisking.
I kidnapped this poor scottish guy right in front of their faces and they didn't even ask me for ID
Yeah, nobody wants them.
:P
Is he behaving?
I'm not allowed to be left alone.
it's part of my parole
You should be partying.
I used the best pick up line on him and it didn't even work
Not stuck in here.
Nate's got the car, he's picking up his tux
What was the line?
"You look lost"
has that twat boorite been on here yet?
We're going out tonight with scyess
Tux? The penguin. Lewl
Yeah
Boo was on
Does Chicka's computer suck?
*** EffTeeSee [Bladder@dialup362.ts001.bmt.esat.net] is now known as Ray
dunno, I haven't asked it
You dont have to ask, you just stick it in anyway.
If it takes 3 1/2 floppys then you're set.
omg diss
whoa
You ARE turning into Mandingo
Unless you are mandingo.
* Ray ponders
I hope not.
He's a tit.
He's on Nate's computer anyway
My computer is the slow one
Good luck, Chicka on your big day.
..000000212211111111111111111111.,l......l;;'
.
I keep forgetting to say that.
5hjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjJ";
I hope all works out.
5hjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjJ";
and that he says I Do.
chicka's brain has broken
Blue
I wouldn't worry about HIM
I'd worry about me
gah
wrong window
Pause before you say it.
is his accent badass?
make it interesting
It totally is badass
does he want to beat you up all the time? I've brought an interprete
r
Yes, he kicked me right in the face when we met
It's more appropriate than hugging

---
Mediocrity at its most average.

take cover-- it's hitler's dreaded roflwaffe
eschewing nerve gas for laughing gas.
strafing innocents with hilarity
Running out of Jew jokes? Just call the roflwaffe
that reminds me of another true tale of a job interview

---
What others say about boorite!

[14:42:11] not for boorite. I also saw him identify an XLR port whilst in a tunnel barely nigger than his body.

---
Batman created by Bob Kane

It's true. At first, I thought I might be too nig to fit.

---
What others say about boorite!

That was a typo, you tranny fucks. I had meant to type:

"boorite can lift 300lbs with his wang"

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

hey choad, you ever bash it up so bad it looks like it was thrown from a car?
I hope we're talking about penises
yes
more like i ran naked through a thornbush
mine looks like it lost a boxing match
>_<

---
What others say about boorite!

[00:30] i cant be bothered to make a new comic
[00:31] cant i release a special edition dvd of an old comic?
[00:31] with added wookies
[00:31] that's called posting in Photoshop Valley
[00:31] i dont have photoshop!
[00:31] make friends with girls and at least one of them will fuck you
[00:31] how will you add the wookies then?
[00:32] who cares about wookies when you need to get laid?
[00:32] wookies need love too
[00:32] what if you're Han Solo?
[00:32] wookies my ass
[00:32] * BigEvilDan wookies boorite's ass.
[00:32] omg
[00:32] the man gave his name to a euphemism for wanking, I'd bet he'd shag an asteroid if it had a cleft in it
[00:32] wookie wookie i got nookie
[00:32] Raargh!
[00:33] bigevildan will wookie you

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

*snip kaufman's hilarious conversation with phreaky on top compilation songs to prevent her next door neighbours having sex. Suggestions included Benny Hill Theme, William Shatner, Alvin and the Chipmunks.

[04:35] how is everyone
[04:35] what's the word on the street
[04:35] hi brad how are you
[04:35] what's it worth to you?
[04:36] i am okay
[04:36] cool
[04:36] when I went to Belfast it was "Fuck the Police" but we'll not get into that
[04:36] Ok, then play Travel Taboo. Tbe five banned words are "more," "god", "yes," "unnnnngh," and "oogachaka". Every time someone says one of those, EEEEEEEP!
[04:37] don't they like the police in belfast :(
[04:38] Sure they do, but they never forgave Sting for going solo

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

Kajun: wait, where the cunt did Rohypnol come from?
Kajun: hey, he gave me a left hook
Kajun: you fucker
IvyThePlant: right after your weather mental block
Humbert_Ro: Sorry
Humbert_Ro: I thought you were black.
Kajun: it's the wang
Kajun: I get that all the time
cpausti: you know what would be cool
Humbert_Ro: ya
Humbert_Ro: Why is your wang black/
Humbert_Ro: Sticking it in Ivy's lake?
Kajun: sadly no
Kajun: too much bad sex
Kajun: it's holding it's breath
Kajun: non-violent protest and all that
cpausti: that'd be cool if i had sex to call bad
Kajun: damn buddhist penis
Humbert_Ro: At least it's not immolating itself.
Kajun: I wish
IvyThePlant: who's sticking their wang in my lake?
Kajun: you mean you don't even know?
Kajun: jesus, Ivy
Kajun: you need to get some help
IvyThePlant: wait, i don't have a lake
IvyThePlant: it's a pond
Kajun: is that better?
Humbert_Rohypnol thought i twas too tight to be a lake.
Kajun: over here it'd be called a loch
IvyThePlant: oh, you were speaking metaphorically
IvyThePlant: whew, i was worried
IvyThePlant: i wouldn't stick anything in that pond
Kajun: I'm so confused
Kajun: all I know is Sex and the City has just come on, so I must throw shoes at the TV until it stops
*** Phreaky (phreakyde@pool-64-223-60-98.prov.east.verizon.net) has joined channel #stripcreator
IvyThePlant: well boorite's sticking his wang in my metaphorical pond, but the city doesn't allow anything in my actual pond
Phreaky: Whoa.
IvyThePlant: i mean...
IvyThePlant: yeah, i got nothin'
Phreaky: doesn't sound like you got nothin'
Humbert_Ro: heh
Kajun: fuck off you arseholes
Humbert_Ro: "your pond is so wet" etc. etc. etc.
Kajun: why do you keep logging on when I'm trying to go to bed
Phreaky: Hi Kajun. :)
IvyThePlant: ha!
Kajun: hi phreaks
IvyThePlant: i'm sure someone can make a fish joke
Kajun: PICK MORE SENSIBLE CHATTING HOURS!
Kajun: I was avoiding the fish joke
Kajun: and anything about a fountain
IvyThePlant: i expected you to jump all over those
Kajun: oh I will
Kajun: someday
Kajun: ....someday

Inquiring to choad how the backgrounds he was working on were working out.

how's your BGs working out choad?
as good as your BJs?
pretty much--they both suck
HIYOOOOOO
oh no you di'int!

---
Poop.