No Fear by ragu4u 11-28-09

Kill em boy. Shoot em right twixt the eyes. But... Yeah boy. Right between our eyes.

Holy Retribution by ragu4u 11-29-09

Orders from the Bishop are, no Communion for you, Patrick Kennedy. So killing a fetus is frowned on... ...but eating a live God is cool? That's blasphemy, Mr. Kennedy. So what now...you're cutting off my Bingo rights?

Sweet (and sticky) Dreams

Mr. Sandman, why do the bedtime stories you read to me always involve "The Kama Sutra"?

by ragu4u, 11-29-09

Rough Rider by ragu4u 11-29-09

You called for a Maintenance Man? Yup. Can ya'll fix my buckboard. A buckboard? Well I can try. Where is it? Follow me. This is a bed, not a.... Ya'll would say different if ya saw me & my gal friend on it.

White House Security by ragu4u 11-30-09

You're under arrest, pal. But I.... Can it. You could slip by in that outfit at Easter but not in November.

Too Much Good News by ragu4u 12-01-09

Waldo, our worst fears are about to be realized. Oh no Maude, not our Kevin? Yes. He said he's bringing his beau home tonight. Our son a fag? I won't be able to handle it. Later that evening... Mom, come quick. Dad just smiled real big then dropped dead.

Naughty & Nice by ragu4u 12-01-09

You know I been a good little girl, Santa. Wonderful. Good little girls get all the nicests gifts. 15 Years Later You know I've been a naughty, naughty girl, Santa. Do I ever? The naughtiest little girls get all the nicest gifts.

Ebony in the Ivory Tower by ragu4u 12-02-09

The people won't balk at 30,000 more troops, will they Rahm? Look out the window , sir. That should tell you. What has their picketing Mercedes Benz got to do with anything? All we are saying, is..."give peace a chance...". It's been a long day, sir. Will you be having your qualudes now?

The Space Duel

Gotcha! I said ... "On Two"!

by ragu4u, 12-02-09

Find-A-Date.com

What?

by ragu4u, 12-03-09

Quick Draw McGraw by ragu4u 12-03-09

Ya gotta come quick, Mr. McGraw. Miss Landers is giving all the boys a headjob. Well, don't you care? I heard ya boy. You told me to come quick....and I'll be darned if I didn't.

The Spirit of Giving by ragu4u 12-03-09

"You will leave your mail carrier a hefty Xmas gratuity, or else". Or else, what, I wonder? Will $50 be sufficiently hefty?

Buying "Off the Rack" by ragu4u 12-04-09

I'll look, sir.... ...but I doubt we have a sport jacket with short sleeves. What's THAT supposed to mean?

Computer Dating by ragu4u 12-04-09

How will we recognize each other at the bar? Let's each wear something pumpkin colored. Oh, sweet Jesus! She must be stuck in traffic?

Nabbed by ragu4u 12-05-09

Give me one reason you would believe the ridiculous idea that you might find... ...a chicken carrying cocain? Dulles International Airport. Uh.....OK, give me one more!

In the Netherworld...

Cel-e-bra-tion Time, C'mon! High five, dude! Woo hoo!

by ragu4u, 12-05-09

Jerks Sell Used Cars by ragu4u 12-06-09

Listen, this car has got YOU written all over it, little buddy. Just sign on the dotted line. No strings attached. Or do have a handler for that kind of stuff? Pompous ass.

Down on the Farm by ragu4u 12-06-09

Oh, Hi Hagi! I just finished the sow barn. Nice job, huh? Allah Hu Ak.... I forgot. Hagi wasn't a big pig fan.

What's Cookin?

You always carry a turkey like that? Only whilst injecting the AuJus.

by ragu4u, 12-06-09

In the Not Too Distant Future by ragu4u 12-06-09

What's that? It's a draft notice. A draft? I guess I better shut the windows and put on a sweater. Maybe so...I'm sure dark clouds and heavy winds are heading your way.

"Lock-Up"... Kenya

How did you wind up in this African dungeon, my child? I told them boogers that Kwanzaa twernt nuttin but an Australian airline.

by ragu4u, 12-07-09

Family Meal Time by ragu4u 12-07-09

What are you so happy about? I just got fired. And that makes you happy? Sure....Now I'll have time to eat with my family at the soup kitchen.

Can I Quote You? by ragu4u 12-08-09

Tiger, will you ever play again? Absolutely! Really? As long as fine little hotties want to see my wood I'll keep driving. Allow me to rephrase that question?

Roto-Wizard

He still smells like crap. Good thing you called when you did. I thought I'd never plunge him out.

by ragu4u, 12-08-09

Three Mile Zone by ragu4u 12-09-09

Sorry Tiger, but the team here at TMZ never sugar-coats the news for ANYBODY! Harvey, I never claimed you sugar-coated it. You people tend to roll it in feces then bake it in vomit until a person is ruined. I'm flattered! Mission accomplished. Another job well done.