mmyers
Passing through.
Member Rated:
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| We don't talk enough, Scot. What would you like to talk about? | |
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| I'd like to know more about you, Mike. Got any advice for a kid turning 15 next week? | |
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| Advice? Let's see. Ok, when you're going out drinking, take a sinus pill before you go to sleep and you won't have a hangover. | |
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| Doesn't it seem kind of pathetic to have a plan set out for not getting a hangover? | |
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| Sure, but eventually you get sick of hanging your head over the toilet and saying you won't drink again. Eventually, you admit you are and you try to find ways around it. | |
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| You got any other advice for me, Mike? | |
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| Well, I'm not advocating drug use in any way, but when I was a kid, they used to try and scare us with talk about 'acid flashbacks'. | |
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| Right, the LSD detaching from your spine and causing short acid trips. | |
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| Sure. Well that's all bullshit, man. In fact, I wish I'd have flashbacks because it's be a shitload cheaper than buying more acid. | |
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| Seems weird that they'd say something like that, you know, without any kind of foundation. | |
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| Hey man, they look it like "fear, not information", you know? Hey, let's take a short cut through this blackhole, dig? | |
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| Another thing, Scot, and I'm not endorsing cheating on your spouse, by any means, but one day, you might accidently cheat on your spouse or loved one. | |
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| Now when this happens, you might come home smelling like sex and you won't be able to take a shower. Now the best way to cover is fill up your tank with gas, | |
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| And as you're filling it, spill some on yourself. The smell will be so strong that it will cover up any residual after sex smell. | |
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| You know that you're marrying my mom, right? | |
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| I'll give ya another good piece of advice, Scot, always do your grocery shopping during the daytime, particularly on weekdays. | |
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| That seems to make sense. | |
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| Because the crowds are less and they are more apt to have sales on slower days, right? | |
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| Well that and that during the daytime is when strippers do all of their grocery shopping, probably because they work late nights. Now most of the time, I see them in the dairy aisles... | |
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| We should probably be heading home. | |
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| When I was your age, Scot, little girls looked like little girls. Women didn't start getting boobs until they were 17 or 18, and sometimes not at all. | |
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| And older women looked old, too. Now with surgery and stuff, older chicks look like they're in their 30s. Teenage chicks looking older, older chicks looking young... | |
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| I tell you, man, it's a great time to be alive. | |
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--- Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.
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