But enough about Jay Leno...

Here's a nasty, souless series for ya!

Emiko's Ultimatum! (part 1) by Boritom 7-13-05

Look, Emiko, we're all getting relly tired of this pissy mood you've been in. Can't you at least try to be in a good mood for a while? Fine. If you can say something so funny to me that I can't help but bust out laughing my fucking ass off, I'll try to pretend to be happy for the rest of the week! It's always gotta be pressure with you!

Emiko's Ultimatum! (part 2) by Boritom 7-13-05

Shit... I gotta think of something fucktastically funny to say... Uhhh... ummmm... welll... I could.... no! Okay, what about.... no... Damn it! I can't think of anything even mildly humorous to say! It's like a black hole of unfunny in my head! This must be what it's like to be Ray Romano!

Emiko's Ultimatum (part 3) by Boritom 7-14-05

Look, Suki... you're trying to hard to think of something! Just take a deep breath and say the first thing that comes into your mind! Corned beef nipple cabbage tower! You are a sad fucking piece of work, Suki! *sigh*

Emiko's Ultimatum! (part 4) by Boritom 7-14-05

Okay, how many Asian girls does it take to change a light bulb? I can honestly say I don't give a flying fuck in a rolling donut! You know something, Emiko? You couldn't be a bigger bitch if you were a co-host on "The View!"

Emiko's Ultimatum! (Cuntclusion) by Boritom 7-14-05

Face it, there's nothing you can possibly say to me that could make me laugh, so you may as well give... I'm dying Emiko! Wh--what? I just found out the other day. I have inoperable cancer of the colon. At most, I have maybe three weeks left to live, most of which will be spent in excruciating agony! BWAAHAHAHA HAHAHAHHAAA! *SNORT* GUFFAWWHAHAHA- HAHAHAHAHAAA! Holy shit, I'm gonna wet myself! TEE-HEHEHEHEEEEE!!! You fucking bitch!

...because I'm a cruel fucking prick!

---
[i]"For the love of beatings, I plunder until my loins find satisfaction!!" [/i]

Well i didn't really like the first one, i don't know who Ray Romano is so i didn't get the second one, i'm not a fan of the third one, i've never seen 'The View' so the fourth one was way over my head, and the fifth one is a bit weird...

But 'Cuntclusion' is a fantastic word, so A+ :D

Maybe a nice background. Maybe different characters. Maybe not.