Next Issue: D.O.A. --- OF DEATH!

Author: ArtemisStrong

Date: May 30, 2004

by ArtemisStrong
5-30-04
My skin is blistering off my malnourished frame in chunks of gooey plhegm-like globules. Is this a bad sign?
Do these said globules emit a foul smell or noxious odor of some kind?
Geh... dunno... I guess they sorta smell like Corona.
Dude, you like totally put the "lime" in "limaceous hunk of retrograded flesh"!
So... >cough<... Yah, anyways, you're slowly dying. I'd place your time of demise anywhere within the next 72 hours.