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| Welcome to Emo Boy News, tonight, our reporter has gone out and inerviewed Emo Boy's love interest, who has begged us to remain nameless. | |
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| Yes, she does not wish to be associated with Emo Boy, and frankly, who does? | |
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| Miss Unlucky, have you ever considered dating Emo Boy? | |
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| I'd rather have a deformed bull penetrate my arse. | |
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