You've got to help me, Doctor Worm. There's this exquisite dead guy who I just find S-E-X-X-Y. It's like everything right is wrong again.
You think you've got it bad? Youth culture killed my dog, I've got a rabid child, and I'm forced to be a counsellor for psychos.
Come on Doc, my emotions are in turmoil. I can't just become a robot. I can hear you have problems, but right now you're your own worst enemy.
I mean, I did great things for science! I discovered a new particle, man! But order one hooker from Istanbul (not Constantinople as some claim), and suddenly...
The next day outside New York City...
He didn't help. I'll just have to accept fate. Kiss me, Son of God. I'm ready for that first kiss.
*sigh* I need to find a way off this fucking website...
