I know Commander Riker is covering for our little "beam Jesus into deep space" incident, but what are we doing here?
The Romans have managed to steal some of our technology, and are using it to maintain their empire. Data, it's up to you to destroy the Roman empire.
I assume I have the Enterprise's resources at my disposal, Captain?
All we can spare are the PickMaster 3000 electric nosepicker, some dryer lint, and Counsellor Troi.
You expect me to destroy an entire empire with just the three most useless items on the ship?
It could be worse. Worf is supposed to cure cancer with only a rubber band and Wesley Crusher. I wish we hadn't used up our budget on that epic space battle.
