All comics by El_Bofus

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by El_Bofus
8-02-02
El_Bofus sits and ponders the next hellspawn exit-the-room joke
I sense that perhaps I must soon tell more bad jokes
Bo make money fo' Simo.
Wow, Simo could market action figures of himself...GenerationX Plastic Jesus!
Send yo' money to us televangeleezts!
So in the end....
Yes, I've got cotton pants. Hi!!!

 

by El_Bofus
8-02-02
Why do we like the damn dog?!?
So this naked blone walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a bratwurst under the other...
It is cute.
I have a choice of the bratwurst or eating your ball.
I lick de poodle?
I got Cotton Pants.
Well, then we can have our cake and eat it too! *Laughtrack goes here!*
Kill him after I sex poodle

 

by El_Bofus
8-03-02
The Rev and Bo discuss a night lock-in at Clarence-town
Ok, so it was my idea for going back thru Clarence, but you asked the cop if he wanted a beer.
I wanted to keep you talking to him.
Me? You da businessman in every sense! I ain't gonna get us outta jackwing fuck!
Look! *heheheh* I got his fuckin keys, man!
Dammit! Wrong Greeks!
So, uh, why have we not become of the dearly departed from this wretched place like so many warty butts?
Diogenes would consider it a selfish act, you smarmy bitch!

 

by El_Bofus
8-04-02
Bo has another one of his more interesting dream cycles during theta-wave REM sleep
This has to be some sick nightmare...
Whoa, wait a goddamned minute! You fucked a poodle and then killed Bo?!?!?
He wa gonn eat my ball
I can never understand my own damned humor, but in some demented twisted sense...it has meaning.
Zachary, why am I going on a mindfuck thru your mind?
Why are you making me and us stand at the Whitehouse?

 

by El_Bofus
8-05-02
Meanwhile, back at the ranch...
HEY! YOU ARE DOG ON BALL! I AM INCEST-PR0DUCT! YOU WANT TO RUB MY TITS?
I gon kill you and make you die like de stoopid jokyjoke dood.
HOW FUCK IS GOIN ON?
Don't fuck with that damned dog!
Har de ha hoo! you look like a peners wit de liddle hat covrin it up! har de hoo hoo!
i will go cry

 

by El_Bofus
8-06-02
Dammit, Garret!!!
Bo who....he knows damn well
.......
Umm....try Scott...sources can refresh your memory.
Yes.
Does this make things any clearer now?
No more identity crises...God forbid.

 

by El_Bofus
8-07-02
Hey Pretty Boy! Yeah you, Zachius!
Shit, now the lunatic who came outta nowhere? Why me?!?
Dramatized response since I am an ass.
Yo, yeah since I can read your mind in this thing, I was wanting to recant on any offensive shit I might have done. All in fun and me bein stupid-like, eh?
Well, yeah, since you're Bo and you are a fucker like that, I guess I'll let it go. It's cool.
I can dig it....but suddenly i don't feel quite like myself
Nah, it's all good.

 

by El_Bofus
8-07-02
So Zack toinz me inta dis weeny head (fairly dezoivedly) and Quirky needs herself a fittin ' character.
That's about the size of it. Why the hell do I have to keep looking up?
This is sooo not PC...I'll take a raincheck on the beatings
So mebbe dis here headweeny can help me think of some idea to hep wid it? Like I'm some alien wid dem psycho powers,eh?
Um...maybe so. Now i kinda don't like lookin up, so start thinkin, Weeny!
Hmm...somehow i think I'd better move on to the next frame.
That's about the size of it. Why the hell do I have to keep looking up?

 

by El_Bofus
8-08-02
Situational repairs.
Ummm...dat didn't woik out right.
Especially since you royally screwed up the last frame of the previous column, Weeny!
Dat whole fya thing Mr2Duks did might somewhat woik, might even swap us both ova backwahds.
God, I hope so, you sound so hellaciously like Dr. D'amato it's killing me.
Oops...
Ow...I think I'll just let this storyline die and you can go about it how you wish...
Ok...this bodysuit itches!

 

by El_Bofus
8-09-02
Well shit...I dicked myself into the wrong body and Garret got called down
Yep, guess we'll find out who it was when school starts.
Zack really is a decent son-of-a-so-and-so. I just jumped in with no clue what was going on.
Gaah!!!!
Here, swap back over, ya puke.
All's hell that ends hell...
Hah! Thanks a lot, but this isn't gonna end anytime soon.
Sadly enough, no. This place is like LSC on LSD.

 

by El_Bofus
8-10-02
Bo the Semi-Known expresses his thoughts....
Well, this wagon got a lotta folks angry...we who study the Satires of Juvenal get angry over such.
Even though I don't remember you, you might have a point.
Of course I didn't know a great deal of situations going on, but it's somehow nice to place ourselves in the position of a sketch on paper just to fuck around.
You're insecure, too, aren't you? Else you wouldn't have such a quick and grand defense.
People, just ease up.
Fuckin ay, I find it much easier to forget the written word than the spoken word! Besides, it's a gawddamn comicstrip...did there people not watch cartoons?
Either that or we're all growin' up without rememberin' why the hell we started doin' so.

 

by El_Bofus
8-13-02
So two weeks, man. Maybe all this fuckedness can get settled and life can go on.
You've got a backward-ass way of lookin' at things, ya know?
Well, this long-haired Spock-lookin portrayal of Bo has seen enough shit happen to himself and to others...
So you're valiantly keeping a spark of hope alive?
Yep. Besides, maybe I can swipe a good joke or two from some of the forum writers, eh?
Dammit, Bo.

 

by El_Bofus
8-22-02
Sean "P. Diddy" Combs speaks...
So its like I was telling Tupac right before I paid off the hitman..."We need to play down our high profiles. What if one of us were to get killed?"
I strongly suggest that Mr. T make a run for the presidency.

 

by El_Bofus
10-21-02
The stuff men are made of
Jeeminy shit...I thought all that was dead and over with.
«¥Ñ╣æ¢ó⌂«»╕│ö
Is determined by what they hold onto hardest
People strike me as so gawddamned funny.
╕╜Ñ⌐¿ºªñ£ñº¥Ü«Ö»
But when one lets go, it lets his life go on.
But, come to think of it, if you had to walk around with a corncob shoved up your pious imperical ass all day long, you'd probably strike me as funny too.
₧ñ╗»Ñ¢Ü¥Ü¢£╕çêî↕¶→º←

 

by El_Bofus
10-22-02
I scheme, you scheme, we all scheme...for no damn reason at all.
Hey Shauna, those lunkheads are at it again, delayed resurrection style.
Oh boy. Dumping their fears and weaknesses by being jealous and raising silly attacks?
Such pharmaceuticals are not available to conduct this procedure in a safe and unnoticed fashion.
Yeah, pretty much. Good ol' name calling, yes? They don't respond well to actual reaction, and I'm not so grand on generating such wordy excrement.
Heheheh, what about the Blitz-Kriger dysentary incident?
Yep, we ALL knew it-a whole new meaning to a "Flaming Butt Pirate." So it was embarassing and could've killed you, but you care as much now.
Hahah! Gee, I'd damn near forgotten that...bet Ike remembers the old Ghost of the Drizzling Phantod.
Just a small reminder to that anti-Andy Dick that yes, his shit DOES stink.

 

by El_Bofus
11-05-02
Consultation with The PJP upon a JagerFast evening
Hey guys, so what do you make of this bullshit getting blown out of proportion as usual?
Processing ¡ê¡ã¡åFor some reason, you have such a power of bastardized outspokenness, it will calm as quickly as it birthed.
Enter the Anti-Bo
No, let a real reason speak.
Ok, here be's the deal - there seem to be a few who want to kill you cuz you ain't ya old self - up theirs with a broke chainsaw! Gotta find who loves ya and who don't, eh?
Are you Jimminy Cricket or somethin?
Hey, you're the one who usually purveys a moral message! You step on me by gettin a lobotomy, but real friends are the only ones that can handle the real you, and soon its about to be an army of one.

 

by El_Bofus
11-08-02
DRONE DRONE DRONE KAPPA ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA DRONE DRONE DRONE
So there goes that dickhead into his room again. I knew he had troubles going to the bathroom, but to piss in John's shoe?
What is the next step, Bofus P. Scott?
Well, if it were my shoe that were pissed in, I'd puke in the offending party's floor
This next scene is censored due to the high-caliber evisceration of previously ingested materials that is now taking place. . .

 

by El_Bofus
11-20-02
So the Unibrain has been exposed to goatse.cx for the first time...bwahahah!
So...now you know the power of the dark side of the skillz of Bofus P. Scott!
Goatse.....dot.....cx.......why, damnit?!?!? Such things should not exist!
hmm?
Heheheee! But think of the fun we can have! Remember those mad l33t protocols I was describing?
You mean...Blame it on the rhythm of the Samba?
You have learned well, my brethren.
Uncle Jager!!!!

 

by El_Bofus
1-08-03
Voice recognition on...
Ja wollt, Herr Doktor Bo!
An absence...possibly disappearance...who is to say?
Ok, Frankie, fade us into Limbo 11, vector 12.7. While there, we'll need an entire kernel recompile.
Iternal re-engineering will be required even for minimal resource task usage...
To be continued...I'll be back?
Morphological re-engineering will be installed prior to the kernel recompile. Prior to that, your tasks will be directed to more...important things.
All of their base are belong to you!

 

by El_Bofus
12-13-03
frost.bbboy.net/whipandchad - The Pandemonium Fortress
So I've had this forum with the local rock station for months now, and I intend to still run it when I get back to Natch.
So you are going back? That's a big step.
There's really no point to this.
Yeah, and I had to post a strip since WhiteMonkey saw there was a slight delay on the "bandwagon" issue
Wait, you're not going to Scholars again, are you?
Except to raise a little more hell
Nah, they'd string me up. Aside, I have my own bandwagons to carry.
You're just one for trouble, arent you?

 

by El_Bofus
12-15-03
Pissing on old graves is fun.
Whatcha readin' there, Bo?
Check it out, Nick, something this twat wrote about me damn near last year
I didn't drop out, by the by.
This was the guy that you said had so much intellect but the personality of a turd?
Yeah, about that much.
I just don't know when to quit, do I? Oh, I'm transferring back, you guys.
Kinda funny how he didn't realize what happens when you snap.
What's fun is I get to maim his persona on the radio spot I've already applied for.

 

by El_Bofus
12-15-03
So did you ever actually say any "racist" or "homophobe" things?
You know, I asked that. Never could get a straight answer. Stuie was always the evasive one.
What did he base his thoughts off of?
My guess is either lack of something better to do or...no, it couldn't have been jealousy.
I might let it drop...one day.
Of the fact that you have class?
Not my fault I developed a following.

 

by El_Bofus
1-17-04
A small mystery to really not worry over, but kinda funny
The fuck? who deleted all of WhiteMonkey's comics? And here Chris has started up...
WhiteMonkey has made no comics....favorites include UnmitigatedHardness
Events are explained
Heh, poor Berge...I knew it would be as such
pregnant, army, yadda
Man, I really don't miss it, now that I think of it...
drama drama I'm better than you drama

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