All comics by GreySoldierfellow

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We meet Gabe from Penny Arcade to ask him this question..
Who the hell is this?
Um... I was wondering.. Do you try to be funny?
......
Well?
And so ends the.. Yeah, whatever..
Shut the hell up!
Yes sir..

 

We meet the author.. Well, not really..
Hello... I am a SQUIRREL!
So?
And so our stupid author cowers in fear..
I'm LankyDavid! Muah ha..
Good bye!
Lanky David has meet someone of the past..
Uh, who are you?
You ****ing bastard! You are that damn clown who raped me! DIE!

 

In Perfect Dark.. Area 51
Thank you Joanna! You saved me!
Quick! I have to get you out of here! People are trying to kill us!
Airforce 1..
Mr. President, I have to get you to the escape pod!
Security! Why are they shooting!
Cetan
DIE! He he he!
Rar, rar, RAR!

 

And finally.. The author gets Sey and Ynaa in the same area, hoping for a battle..
G'day fella! I'm Sey, Almighty from dkvine, and who are you?
I'm Ynaa, and dkvine needs more PORN!
So.. Why haven't you registered to the message boards at dkvine?
... It needed more porn!
So far, a fight isn't brewing up..
That's something we all can agree on, but its a video game site!
Then it needed more hentai!

 

Finally, something brews up..
So.. Know any sexy blondes that can suck my cock at ages 12 to 14.. I'm only 16..
... What the hell?
Hello?? Ynaa? Where are you? About those young blondes!
....
All well ends well, eh?
Shut up! I'm outta here!
Ynaa? Ynaa!! Come back!!

 

Shut up! I don't wanna hear about your damn cock sucking blonde girlfriend!
You know, I've been faking my accent to impress people!
Oh yeah! My girl friend, Suzie, has black hair dumbass! I never talked about blondes!
And now we see Lanky David!
Woah! Who are you shorty?
I'm Ynaa, leave me the hell alone, I just meet a guy named Sey..

 

Woah! Sey? I remember him, I used his account once..
He's coming over here, I'm leaving, see ya!
FREEDOM!!! Free from that child molesting bastard!
Yeah, I still can't believe Sey acts like that still.
Minutes later..
Sey.. You need to stop.. And I can help you!
Hey, where is Ynaa? I could have used his credit card and get free "art" subscriptions..

 

Ynaaa! The mysterious dkvine viewer!
You know what you need on dkvine? MORE PORN!
You know what.. You seem to have a good idea, but you got the wrong person. Join the forums and I'll make you a mod.
Waiting for Ynaaa to join at dkvine forums..
Um.. Chad, are you sure about this?? Ynaa might not come..
I'll pretend I never understood a word you said so shut up. Also, take off the damn mask.
Days later..
"You need more porn!" Again, so long to that mod status..
Uh, Chad, I just got an e-mail from Ynaaa.

 

Time for action!
Sey.. It is time I tought you a lesson, are you ready!
Bring it on then!
Lanky David and Sey are ready to fight!
Are you ready.. This fight will require you to wear those stupid costumes!
Wait.. My zipper is stuck.. Wait.. No, it's not, it's fine!
After getting in their battle outfits!
Sey! You fool, your armor is no match for my agility!
I have the power of the upside-down Triforce!

 

Lanky David powers up, Sey does something very agile!
Time to power up and kick your puny ass!
Lanky David uses some kind of weird fire spell?
Fire from the deep lag-- What the? Sey, what the f--
.............
And it seemed Sey earlier tried to run away, and of course he did, leaving behind his suit of armor!
Oh ****! It's just an empty suit of armor! You won't get away next time Sey!
........ *is about to fall down*

 

Santa and the Snowman!
That is a very shitty joke Santa..
Ho ho whore!
An elf and a baby X-mas tree
You seem to be a very easy to defeat combatant..
Lame Reign Deer!
You suck!
I am better than you!

 

The Pumpkin and the Zombie..
I have a terrible hang-over, I need to get home, can you help me?
A Skeleton vs. the Grim Reaper..
I'm want to join forces with you Mr.Reaper so we can become Skeletor!
End this competition now! This is completely retarded!
Satan wanna-be vs. Jesus on his cross!
Hi..
Hi..

 

Ready, GO!
Um, is this really neccessary? I don't wanna fight..
I can set things on fire! Watch!
Santa lights the snowman on fire!
I'n melting! AAAHH!!!!
I win! Whore whoe whoe whoe!
Santa WINS!
I hate you Santa..
What's in your wallet! Wait, I burned it along with your scarf and hat..

 

The second match in the snow field is about to start!
This is going to be easy! Are you ready to lose?
........
The elf creature is ready to fire a rocket!
Time to blow up! I'm gonna blow you up!
..........
FAILURE! YOU SUCK!
NOO!! I'm dead!
....

 

It turns out the whole time, Sey was playing a video game and finally lost.
YOU LOST! Failure! YOU SUCK!
This game sucked anyway! How in the blooming hell did that happen! That's it, I'm gonna sell this shitty video game! It sucks anyway!
You suck major ass! You lost against the DEADLY X-MAS TREE! Are you bloody listening? I said you bloody lost, you bloody suck! That's the bloody point!
Might as well warn people online about this game called holiday fighters.
Sey begins to type what he thinks.
Holiday Fighters sucks! I played it and it sucks major arse! You can't even select your own character, the game auto-matically gives you a random character to play as!

 

On dkvine forums.
Sey: Holiday Fights sucks major ass! Saf, are you paying attention?
Saf: Sey, why did you even buy that game? It has very horrible ratings, and if you don't mind, I have more important things to do!
Giro: Before you even bought the game, did you bother to look on the back of the case? The game can only handle 2 players, graphics suck, and seems very stupid!
Sey: Eh.. It was a, um.. Present.. By the way, are you in the army?
Sey begins to leave.
Giro: No.. Anyway, what the heck is Jesus and a guy pretending to be Satan doing in that game? And why the heck would they be fighting in a video game?
Sey: Well.. That's nice Giro..

 

And so Sey leaves the yapping author!
Giro: Don't you also go to GameFaqs Sey? Weren't you treated like a KING? You could of atleast asked them! Sey, SEY!
Sey: I'm outta here..
And so Giro leaves..
Klobber: Forget about it Giro.. We already know how much the game sucks dick..
Giro: Well.. Okay.. I guess it's time to leave then sense I have no further use!
And so Klobber leaves also.
Klobber: I don't work at the site anymore.. I shouldn't even be here..
Chad: Now Klobber, about that....

 

Back to Sey..
What do I do, what do I do?
Sell the game you twit.. Surely that ought to be a solution..
Sey turns off the TV and takes the game with him.
Didn't you hear me? You suck major ass! YOU ****ING SUCK! Failure, failure, dumbass, dumbass, ****ing loser!
Wait.. Wasn't this rated "E"? Why does this game curse some much? Oh well..
And so, Sey is ready to leave his house!
I gotta sell this piece of shite!

 

Look.. Can't I go! I have to sell this game, and..
You won't get away this time Sey! I know where you live! Time to finish that fight!
Sey realised he left his game upstairs..
Well, it sucks major arse, but okay! What, I don't have it on me!
A game? Okay Sey, I'll let you live if you let me play this "GAME"!
Meanwhile
Human sucks major ass! He sucks! The human sucks! He sucks Major ass!
Shut the hell up you fool! You say the same thing everytime..

 

Jesus VS. Zombie...
.... Whatever!
Help my hangover problem please!
What the hell! How come I can't select my character? Why the **** am I playing as a zombie? Why the hell is he talking about hang overs? PURE SHIT!
Sweet Jesus! I'm Jesus Christ! Maybe I have a chance!
Jesus sends Zombie to hell!
Good to hell!
Help me hangover problem Christ!

 

BOSS! Fight the wanna-be!
Help my hangover!
Time to lose!
Player 2, sucks ass! Major ass! Lots of ass! It's all what Player 2 sucks! YOU ****ING SUCK PLAYER 2!
I win! Time to fight Jesus!
What the **** was that? Seriously? What the hell do I fight a CPU controlled bastard?
Because you suck..

 

Player 1, defeated, because you suck major ass too! Both of the players are ****ing dumbasses and you both suck major ass! **** all of you!
P1 who sucks major ass!
CPU
Sey.. You were right.. This game does suck..
How the hell did they get on the moon? Why were they are the moon? And why did a CPU enter the match? How did Jesus lose? Why couldn't I move my character...
And so, Sey realises this game is worse than he thought.
Because you all suck Major ass! Muah ha ha ha ha! Both of you suck major ass! You can't even beat each other up! The CPU did it for you, ****ing fools! You both of you suck ass!
YOU ALL ****ING SUCK! You guys probally suck each other's asses!

 

Hours later, after Lanky David left in shock..
Game sucks! Now that I have it with me, I'm out to sell it!
Hey, want to buy my game? Holiday Fighters, only 30 pounds!
Sorry, people usually pay for me! I don't buy games.
Hey sexy! Suck my cock and you'll get this game from me for free!
NO!

 

No..
Hey.. Want to buy a game called holiday fighters?
NO!!!!!!
You are so hot I'll let you have it for free.. But you gotta have sex with me!
You sexy young thing! Suck ma mean cock, and you'll get my game for free.. Suck it, lick it, shove it in your little-
NO!!! I was told about you pedos! GO AWAY!

 

NO ****-O!
Sexy girl, will you buy my--
GET THE **** AWAY NOW!
Woah beautiful tits! Will you buy my--
Sey keeps failing..
Shut up pervert!
Will you buy my game, I'll let you have it for free if you--

 

Sey decides to return home..
Damn it.. This is hard work!!
I can't sey it! *types* What do I do! I can't sell it, this is hard!
Well you horny idiotic bastard.. I think I have a solution.. Why don't you sell it to anything not female, sense they will always reject you anyway..
What about that bloody woman who looked kinda.. YUCK!
That's because she is a 50 year old prostitute you twat! Now go sell your stupid game so I can enjoy you not being here..

 

We will shortly land at the Washington airport.. Please be aware our ceiling was scraped off..
If you mind, I'd rather sit in my bench and die!
Do you want to buy holiday fighters?
Will you buy my game?... BUT I COME FROM ENGLAND! I'M ONLY 15!
Enter the U.S. Army to get money and a free trip to Iraq..
We just got hit by a rocket propelled grenade from someone named George Bush, he said he was sorry, please fasten your seatbelts!
Shut up! Don't you realise we are about to enter the battlefield!
We are all going to die! I knew I shouldn't--... Oh, a customer! Excuse me sir, will you buy my game called Holiday fighters?

 

Sir.... We have a new troop..
Bush: Let him over here in my nation.. Thing?
Mr. American President, you got me in a mix up.. I'm only 15 and I come from England! I was a tourist! I was thrown in the army for no reason.. Can you please let me go?
Bush: I'm glad all american citizens are fighting in this war, even at the age 15! Now I want.. I need.. Something..
I'm NOT American, and I don't even have any army gear! Will you at least give me one last request, Mr. President.. Will you buy my game Holiday Fighters?
What's a game? What is this fighter holidays? I have important business to do, like play around as a cowboy,now son.. You go kill Iraqs because we are a christen country! I must go!

 

AAHH!!! I'm on fire!!!
....
....
AAAAHHHH!!!!
Hi! I'm Buba!
...

 

SEY SNAPS!
GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!
Too bad big meanies who use explosives on our buildings!
I'm Baba! I'm still alive!
I need the oil.. Country bad to dad.. Revenge mine.. What kind of an American are you? YOU DON'T QUIT THE WAR I MADE--.. I mean.. YOU DON'T QUIT the WAR I STARTED! I mean.. YOU DON'T QUIT MY WAR!
Mr. President, I can't take this war! Its useless..

 

Sey leaves Bush and tries to find a way out..
Need to sell my game!
Need to win this war!
Sey finally sells his game, in the least likely place too!
BUY MY GAME! I JUST WANNA LEAVE THIS PLACE!
Okay.. Here's your money! 50 american dollars!
Throughout the war..
Smoke me and make me your country's icon!
Oh yeah! Free cigarrette!

 

Home.. Finally, and I got my money!
I finally sold the shitty game! Yippee!
So you finally sold it you twit.. Not like I didn't expect that.. Even an idiot like you could sell that peice of garage..
Now shut up and let me go on the internet..
Fine, I never like you anyway!

 

Man.. What a horrible memory that was.. War.. Crappy video game, Bush dressed up as a Cowboy.. Maybe I should do something else..
Sey... Sey.. SEY! You pathetic little fool! Weren't you going to go on the internet? I've got better things to do you know..
Sey realizes he's in his room.
Um.. I think I'll search for some beautiful young girls on the internet!
Right.. You sure about that you twit? Because I do recall you said at dkvine you joined a "pedophile catching" group..
Well find me some new kind of pornography, something you would like! I mean, human shaped thing you would like!
Sexy Microsoft Computers.. Wait.. Human shaped? Well, he's your horny results. Now quit harassing me to find porn!

 

Now begins our story of MeinKharlie and Carter's Journey through the land of the banned..
Well let's hear it!
I got an idea for a dkvine comic!
And so begins SinatraFonzarelli2/MeinKharlie's comic series..
Hmm.. Okay, I'll make it! Great idea!
It'll be dkvine story arc! You know how much Chad is an--
So they head to dkvine!
Let's show it to the people at dkvine!
These comics are great!

 

DKVINE STORY ARC!!!!!!!111, WTFROFL
MeinKharlie: *shows links* How will it end? What will become of the Seusserverse? Keep tuning in to find out!
Carter: I would like to thank Charlie for his great contributions to this project.
And so, Chad sends BanzaiCarter and SinatraFonzarelli2 to the land of the banned!
Chad: BANNED MUTHA FUCKAS!
Chad: I'd like to thank myself for banning your cracka asses. Pity neither of you will get to see this, since your IPs are now restricted forever. Hah.
Chad: (?) Thank you for thanking me, alternate version biggie-me!

 

Teleporting.. Wow..
What the hell? This sucks!
So where are we going?
Note to foolish viewers: There is no such place called land of the banned, I made up the place. If you get banned from dkvine, you don't go anywhere..
Where are we?
Hell if I know...
Oh shit!
ConkersCrib: The fun world! So, wanna see my GTA Conker skins?

 

bathrooms: Chris Seavor! Let's talk about him!
It another fucktard!
Uh.. We are screwed! It can't get any worse..
Don't say that it will.. Besides, it seems we'll have to make peace with these idiots!
SinatraFonzarelli2 yelling cause a chain re-action with the atmosphere..
bathrooms: CHRIS SEAVOR!
NO!!!!!

 

Suddenly, their location changes..
The author is a fucktard too!
Obviously.. How the hell could this happen anyhow..
Somehow, BanzaiCarter switches to the side SinatraFonzarelli2 was on..
Asshole: cH4D = t3H @$$H013!
What the? Hey, this is the dumbass back in October who got banned on his first post.. The idiot can't stop using 1337 or whatever they call it.
Note: This area of land of the banned contains people who became banned within 1 post!
Finally someone I can agree with around here!
Chad's_A_Fucking_Asshole: So that shitty joker banned you too.. Figures.. That asshole..

 

Chad's_A_Fucking_Asshole joined their party!!!
Fucktard author... Anyhow, know a way out of this place?
Sure, follow me..
After a long walk..
See.. I knew this guy had some brains..
All he did was lead us to a pointless city.. We are still in the "Land of the Banned"..
Chad's_A_Fucking_Asshole suggests that BanzaiCarter needs a "makeover".
Yeah.. And how do I change my avatar if I'm banned!
Hey! You might never make it out alive with that crappy banned avatar Carter..

 

Hours later..
... Okay....
See... Now you can kill asswipes now..
Suddenly.. The Rarextreme gang appears!
Rarextremer: Fear me! I will kill you fools!
Rarextremerspammer: Phere me to! Muah ha ha ha!
And suddenly, they reveal their boss!
And phere the master! Who can teleport in and out of here!
Rarextremewozza: I'm not even banned! Ha ha! Bow before me, if you want merci to kill dkvine!

 

Get rid of dkvine eh? Doesn't sound so bad!
Then bow to your master, WOZZA! U wel due evaritheng eye sae.>
Wozza gets mad!
On second thought. No you fucktard.. Also, your spell check isn't working.
u wel nut jit awae weth tes!!!1 TW0UPS, ATAK!!!1
Let's get em boss!
Lat's get them bosse!

 

The idiotic Rarextremer runs straight into BanzaiCarter's scythe.
Dumbass..
Ow!! I'm bleeding alot! NO!!
Rarextremerspammer gets shocked!
I somehow have electric powers... Oh well..
Ow!! I-I-I-I-I h-h-ate u-u-u-u-u!
And Wozza gets Grenades tossed at him.. Seems nothing "horrible" happened!
I love tossing grenades..
oww! u hert me!!!1

 

Well they recovered quickly..
This is pointless..
You dumbass..
Eye wel nut talor8 thes! We wel shoe hour trU powa!
Yas bosse! Let's git tham!!
True power!

 

Wait second.. Did the background just change from black to white?
The background has been changing alot, so I wouldn't doubt it..
Fulls! Du knot destrack me!!1 Ur affarts R youslass!!!1
Boss.. They could have a point..
After the bright white, the city is seen, in destruction, and our, heroes, idiots, fools, whatever, are covered in ashes..

 

Our heroes get out of the ashes..
Well, Wozza claimed he had a "trU powa", but I doubt he could do this..
Okay, why did that happen?
And also the idiot Wozza gets out of the ashes..
Eye hov weachd mie trU powa!
You don't look different at all..
Wut is dis?

 

The flame reveals itself to be Lanky David!
Muah ha ha ha ha!
You ****in bastards!
Wozza gets a bit mad..
Excuse me! But you just interrupted a very important battle..
What is your point fucking bastard! I own this world! I can do whatever the hell I want! My own presence causes you spell correctly!
Oh.. Is that so? Well do you know who I am? Wozza! Creator of Rarextreme, and I teleport out of this place when ever I want! Who are you to talk to me? You pathetic fool! I am at my true power!
You don't know who you are messing with.. If I ever bothered with your pathetic place, you would be taking orders from me.. You have no idea why I am here.. But if you insist, fight me..

 

OWW!!! I'm burning! I'm on fire!
See how pathetic you are! If this is you true power, then you stand no chance against me! I have hacked dkvine many times, and once I was caught, I was banished to here.. Where I rule ALL!
One of Wozza's allies quickly puts out the flames..
I have put out the flames! I will aide you sire!
My dear comrades, I'm going to get backup, for I am sleepy now!
The character with the name that calls Chad an asshole heads toward Wozza!
I will leave now! What! Go away you fool!
You're not getting away that easily!

 

Wozza and the guy who named himself by calling Chad an asshole vanish together..
Cowards..
No!!! Wozza was our only way out! That coward!
I knew that asshole who named himself after a statement of Chad would use us..
Fear me! Your fire powers are useless!
Actually, I could change that if I decided to hack you..

 

rarextremespammer quickly pops..
Well that was too easy.. I didn't even touch him!
Fear me! I will consume your soul!
You people never learn, do you..
rarextremer quickly catches on fire and begins to melt..
I'm melting! NOO!!!
That was too easy..

 

Great.. So what do we do now?
I don't know.. Give me time to think about it. Hmm.
Carter walks up toward LankyDavid.
....
So you think you can beat me? I know who you are. I guess you decided to do something real bad.. Didn't ya!
LankyDavid turns Carter into a Chessboard and the area turns pitchblack..
You are now a chessboard! Muah ha ha ha! Play chess with me fool!

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