Bigger Then Mayor Lightfoot's Dick

Author: Namgubed

Date: March 6, 2022

by Namgubed
3-06-22
This is Cooper Anderson reporting from the Iowa State Fair, where farmer Libby Greene has won first prize for what may be the largest cucumber ... ever!
She's a beaut, ain't she, sonny?
Weighing in at 2.7 metric tons, this gargantuan cuke is sure to make a healthy bowl of salad, right?
Heh! Well, I tried to sell it to several grocers, pickle plants, and even tried giving it away to charity, and nobody wanted it!
Really? Why not?
They all said it was too cucumbersome!