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| This is Cooper Anderson reporting from the Iowa State Fair, where farmer Libby Greene has won first prize for what may be the largest cucumber ... ever! | |
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| She's a beaut, ain't she, sonny? | |
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| Weighing in at 2.7 metric tons, this gargantuan cuke is sure to make a healthy bowl of salad, right? | |
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| Heh! Well, I tried to sell it to several grocers, pickle plants, and even tried giving it away to charity, and nobody wanted it! | |
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| They all said it was too cucumbersome! | |
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