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| What did I do last weekend? Well, Saturday, I went bungie jumping off a 1,000 foot bridge over a rocky crag below. My cord snapped, but luckily I survived by landing in a tree... | |
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| That fucking tree came out of nowhere! | |
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| Then, Sunday, I was supposed to go chute-less skydiving for the first time, but the plane crashed on take off... Can't believe I also survived that one! | |
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| I can't believe it either, bitch! | |
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Death was getting pretty tired of all Calamity Clara's close calls...
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| Tonight, I'm going to that new bar over on 5th and Elm called, "Club HIV", to sleep with as many bi-sexual guys as I can, sans protection! | |
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| Well, at least it will be a slow, agonizing death... | |
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