andydougan
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Dramatis Personae
Andy Dougan film critic extraordinaire. Enjoys illegal pornography and biscuits.
Russell Crowe actor and poet. Husband to a trophy wife. Father to a trophy son.
Huw Edwards BBC news anchor. The Hunky Face of TeatimeÂ®.
George W. Bush President. Defended the whorehouses of Houston from the Viet Cong.
Christian Slater certifiable actor. The id to Crowe's ego.
Osama and Mullah Omar fugitives. Kandahar's answer to Bert and Ernie.

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No joke

by andydougan
2-08-03

Tony Blair, the new Churchill


	Funny news item of the week, then. It turns out the latest, Powell-praised UK dossier on Saddam's WMDs was largely plagiarised from some guy's postgraduate essay, typos and all.


	I wouldn't quite say that. We did change some of the wording to make Iraq sound scarier. For example, Iraq doesn't "monitor", it "spies".


	Good to see you're sticking to cold objectivity. But why did you have to steal from this poor student's thesis? What about the intelligence that you claimed "crosses your desk every day"?


	Look, we've got no one in Iraq. M16 can barely speak English, let alone Arabic. We haven't got the faintest fuck what's going on. What do you want us to do?


	It'd be nice if you could at least be bothered to make up your own misinformation.

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andydougan
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