andydougan
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Dramatis Personae
Andy Dougan film critic extraordinaire. Enjoys illegal pornography and biscuits.
Russell Crowe actor and poet. Husband to a trophy wife. Father to a trophy son.
Huw Edwards BBC news anchor. The Hunky Face of TeatimeÂ®.
George W. Bush President. Defended the whorehouses of Houston from the Viet Cong.
Christian Slater certifiable actor. The id to Crowe's ego.
Osama and Mullah Omar fugitives. Kandahar's answer to Bert and Ernie.

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Who's left? Oh, yes, the Tories

by andydougan
5-20-02

Iain Duncan Smith, Conservative leader, and Phil Gallie, Con MSP


	Is there any chance at all that we can sucker the Scotch into voting for us, or should we just stop wasting our time?


	Well, it's not like we have anything else to do. But fear not! I have a cunning plan.


	The other day, I heard about some guy called "William Wallace". Apparently the Scotch quite like him. I thought we could start pretending we like him too. It'd make us look like we're one of them.


	Couldn't we just extoll the virtues of our Party?


	Yes, Iain. Because we're such a great Party. rolls eyes

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andydougan
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