All comics by basswalt

 

by basswalt
1-10-01
sometimes i wonder what it all means...
i mean...is there a point to all this pain? is there a reason that "blossum" isn't on EVER, while "wings" can still be found on at least one channel somewhere in the world at any point in the day?
...and what about marshmallow Fluff? i mean, that stuff gets on your hands and you practically have to use Brillo to scrub it off!
you're seriously going to hell in about two minutes if you don't shut the f&%k up.

 

by basswalt
1-11-01
if i told you once, i've told you a thousand times...we're NOT hanging my brother's painting on your head!
...NGAH!!
where should we put it though...
...uhhhhh billy. maybe i could put it on YOUR head?
what exactly do you do with that extra chromosome when you sleep?
maybe we could put it on the INSIDE of my head? huh, billy?

 

by basswalt
1-26-01
Celine Dion
Sacre bleu! Have you seen how skinny I am?! I think that the mirrors in my country must be fucked up! I asked my old husband and he said "Oh yeah, you are damn skinny!"
I was thinking...you know that song I did for the movie "Titanic"? The one where I punch myself in the boobs when I sing it? Oh wait! I do that in every song...I'm such a nut.
I'm really glad I did that one though. It made me like sixty-four billion dollars! Of course, that's only about twelve dollars Canadian money. My old husband takes care of that.

 

by basswalt
2-27-01
Hey! We can't be late tonight because we're on a schedule and stuff and if we're late we'll never freakin' finish this thing!
uhhhh...i'm gonna be late tonight because i have to meet with the priest for my wedding.
What's your point?
i said "I'M GONNA BE LATE!!"
Meanwhile...
DONUTS!!! i love DONUTS!!! Go back to sleep so I can eat you!
uhhhhh...i AM sleeping! seriously, i'm asleep!

 

by basswalt
3-02-01
i'll have a cheeseburger
gosh...do you think that other girls are prettier than me?
no way, baby. you've got a lot going for you...like an extra hundred pounds or so, hey?
and a cheeseburger
really? you think i'm....wait, are you saying that i'm fat?!?!? no animal tranquilizers for you!!
no wait...i was just kidding! (woof!) you're the greatest, baby! (woof!) hey, look! i gotta donut for you!
and a donut!
donut!!! here's your puppy sominex!
yeah, baby!

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