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The Perfect Crime
by
choadwarrior
5-10-03
I am going to abduct you and take you to the mother ship
You'll never get away with it...the media will broadcast live reports from my front lawn 24/7 until I am found.
That's where you're wrong...
Luckily for me, a white girl was also kidnapped today.
Oh, fuck.
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choadwarrior's Comics
07/02/24 - Swing By
02/05/24 - Military History
10/27/23 - Numero Dos
01/12/23 - There's a Crapp for That
12/21/22 - Crowd Source
12/20/22 - Fruitcake Surprise
12/10/22 - We Just Kissed
09/08/22 - St. Andrew
08/29/22 - Black Top
08/29/22 - Sunshine State
08/23/22 - BBQ Anon, and On
08/23/22 - BBQ Anon
05/30/22 - Bikini Wax
05/17/22 - Cogito Ergo Dumb
04/16/22 - Rootin' Tootin'
03/08/22 - Ho Not Down
01/11/22 - Coma Allez Vous
01/11/22 - Short Armed Forces
01/07/22 - True Tales of Job Interviews (18)
12/25/21 - Buttons and Bows
12/21/21 - Cheep Shot
10/24/21 - Warm Up Act
10/19/21 - A Little Astronomy
10/05/21 - The Florida of California
09/20/21 - Cancel That Order
08/24/20 - Tract Housing
08/15/20 - Zoom Boom
08/07/20 - Side Bar
07/01/20 - Family Gay
04/19/20 - Essentially Off Now
03/14/20 - Roll With It
02/16/20 - Cheesy
01/26/20 - Flagrant One
01/20/20 - Civil Wrongs
12/30/19 - Why Did Squad 51 Even Need Rampart?
12/25/19 - Make Merry
12/07/19 - Itchin’ to Tell You
11/12/19 - Back in Time, Far, Far Away
11/05/19 - Relief
10/20/19 - Nap Time
10/19/19 - Hobo on the Range
09/21/19 - The Second-to-Last Supper
04/24/19 - Don't Force Me To Go To Improv Night
04/09/19 - Social Climber
04/02/19 - Led Zeppelin Advertising on MeTV
03/29/19 - Nurturing
02/05/19 - Farthest From the Bright Center of the Universe
02/05/19 - Branding
01/06/19 - Flame Police
01/04/19 - And the Money Shall Follow
01/02/19 - Aye, Pee Pee. Aye.
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12/25/18 - Police Navidad
12/25/18 - Stirring It Up
12/25/18 - Kram Packed
12/18/18 - Nagging Doubt
11/23/18 - My Advice to Northern Californians
11/19/18 - Camp Fire Girl
11/13/18 - Gibraltar
11/13/18 - I'm the Southworst
11/04/18 - The Green Death
10/31/18 - Third Month on the New Job
10/06/18 - Unkindergarten
09/09/18 - The Powerless of Prayer
08/17/18 - El Bario Nuevo
07/14/18 - Curses
07/08/18 - GYNO-MITE!
07/07/18 - Not Speaking My Language
07/01/18 - I Booked the Wrong Hotel
06/16/18 - I Finally Hired a Cleaning Woman
04/02/18 - Cadbury in a Shallow Grave
02/20/18 - There Are No Small Parts
02/18/18 - Bedside Manner
02/07/18 - Statuette
02/04/18 - Cloaca
02/03/18 - Clean Off
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01/20/18 - No Extra Charge
01/13/18 - Boom Boom
01/05/18 - Circus Maximus
01/04/18 - Hold Everything
01/03/18 - Never to be Seen Again
01/01/18 - Timeless Workplace Drama
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11/26/17 - P-Wrecks
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11/20/17 - Third Wish
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11/20/17 - Refuse
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10/28/17 - Male Pattern
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10/07/17 - Clean Streak
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09/22/17 - I Think It's Gonna Be a Long, Long Time
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08/20/17 - Mein Kraft
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03/19/17 - Johnny Pee Good
03/16/17 - Remember
03/05/17 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
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02/04/17 - Pigskin
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01/16/17 - Bullseye
01/16/17 - Hard Time
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12/20/16 - Jackin' It in San Diego
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11/21/16 - Orange Journalism
11/19/16 - Another Bump in the Road
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01/10/15 - The Man from Mars in "Rapture"
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08/11/14 - Dead Comics Society
07/28/14 - Before & After
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07/24/14 - Work Out
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06/14/14 - Flop
06/09/14 - Out of Your Shell
05/17/14 - Arkansas, Perhaps
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05/14/14 - Next Slide
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03/11/14 - My Sympathies
02/12/14 - Socheap
02/10/14 - Sesame Seed Pun
01/30/14 - Bow Talks
01/28/14 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
01/20/14 - Rear Wheel Drive
01/19/14 - Divine Wrong
01/19/14 - Soiled
01/18/14 - Less Than One Hot Second
01/18/14 - Ignoring the Obvious
01/11/14 - Droop
01/05/14 - Drinking Like a Fisher of Men
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12/26/13 - McGoats
12/19/13 - I Love Mormons
12/17/13 - Killer App
12/15/13 - Special Agent
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12/15/13 - Sipper
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12/14/13 - The Voice
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12/04/13 - Wear & Tear
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11/28/13 - Fermez la Bouche
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11/25/13 - Big Deals
11/17/13 - Seeking Companion
11/10/13 - Insecurity
10/30/13 - Multi-Cultural
10/26/13 - Key Bored
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10/17/13 - Assume the Position
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10/13/13 - The Return!
09/30/13 - Blabber
09/22/13 - Tina Turner Goes to a Greek Restaurant
09/22/13 - Exploding on a Screen Near You
09/11/13 - Impacted
08/28/13 - Breaking Blue
08/14/13 - Holy Roller
06/13/13 - I Never Touched Children
06/12/13 - Timing is Everything
06/03/13 - Only the Good Die Young
05/18/13 - This One is a Stretch
05/18/13 - Alone Again, Or?
05/18/13 - Roll Me Away
05/02/13 - Hot Rod
04/30/13 - A Friend of Mine Was Killed Awhile Ago
04/27/13 - Solution
04/22/13 - I'm a Dzokhar, I'm a Smoker, I'm a Midnight Toker
04/22/13 - Lump in my...
04/19/13 - Confession
04/15/13 - Madre de Todos los Chistes
04/14/13 - Echelon
04/14/13 - Eh Hole
03/22/13 - Beaten
03/18/13 - Evolution
03/13/13 - The Rectory
03/13/13 - First Shall Not Be Last
03/11/13 - Fantasy Conclave
02/24/13 - Messiahhhhhh!
02/13/13 - Bean Stalker
02/03/13 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
01/13/13 - Aye, Pee Pee, Aye
01/11/13 - Late Night Entertainment
12/30/12 - Bowl Game (5)
12/30/12 - Bowl Game (4)
12/30/12 - Bowl Game (3)
12/30/12 - Bowl Game (2)
12/30/12 - Bowl Game (1)
12/25/12 - This Ain't No White Christmas
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12/24/12 - Mehrry Christmas
12/24/12 - Bah Humbug
12/22/12 - Fire with Fire
12/10/12 - Cover Story
12/09/12 - Messenger
12/03/12 - McMuffin Top
12/01/12 - Lapse
11/28/12 - Eau Non
11/27/12 - Deadneck
11/23/12 - Poostal Service
11/22/12 - A Very Obamacare Thanksgiving
10/28/12 - Single White Messiah
10/26/12 - Batshit Out of Hell
10/24/12 - Atrophy
10/24/12 - Gentle Cycle
10/16/12 - Decision 2042
10/16/12 - People Tell Me Things: This Time, it's Personal
09/24/12 - Shadow of a Doubt
09/07/12 - I've Been Getting This Question a Lot Lately
08/20/12 - Take the Bad
07/21/12 - Relax: Don't Do It
07/16/12 - Wikipedia Brown
07/14/12 - True Tales of Job Interviews (17)
07/09/12 - Playthings
07/08/12 - Curb A Peel
07/03/12 - Cooper Duper
06/29/12 - $1.50 per Mile--No Questions Asked
06/25/12 - Bygone Era
06/22/12 - Opposites Detract
06/22/12 - From Sandusky til Dawn
06/04/12 - Soup to Nuts
05/25/12 - Club Sandwich
05/24/12 - Welcome to the Club
05/06/12 - Transitions
04/21/12 - If All Organizations Ran Like Public Broadcasting
04/19/12 - Spam, Egg, Sausage, and Spam
04/19/12 - Only as Directed
04/15/12 - Your Mileage May Vary
04/14/12 - Schoolhouse Rock Revisited - Energy Blues
04/14/12 - Schoolhouse Rock Revisited - Nouns
04/11/12 - Dine and Whine
04/08/12 - Hold Your Breath
04/06/12 - Snoop Doggy Dog Paddle
04/05/12 - Boing Chicka Massala
04/04/12 - Offers
04/01/12 - Explorer
03/28/12 - Thy Rod and Thy Staff
03/24/12 - Today at the Bike Shop
03/24/12 - Hold 'Em
03/17/12 - Tonic
03/17/12 - Layers
03/16/12 - Generous Bonation
03/15/12 - Grasping the Economy
03/15/12 - Not the Trickle Down Effect
03/14/12 - Pulling My Lariat
03/10/12 - Keeping Abreast
03/04/12 - That's the Real Thing
02/28/12 - Prison Confession
02/26/12 - Why Wolverine Wasn't Jewish
02/24/12 - Soup Charlie
02/17/12 - Proxima
02/04/12 - Pew Pew
02/03/12 - Auto Incorrect
02/03/12 - Mitt Schlag
01/30/12 - Monagameh Do Doo De Doo Doo
01/27/12 - Cavities
01/27/12 - If Gil Scott-Heron Were Alive Today
01/24/12 - Alternate Jewniverse
01/24/12 - Penultimate Solution
01/22/12 - Fold, Spindle, Mutilate
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01/15/12 - Freiheit Isn't Frei
01/15/12 - Default
01/08/12 - The Scoop
01/05/12 - After Five
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12/19/11 - Launch Tube
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11/24/11 - Butterball
11/24/11 - A Very Louie C.K. Thanksgiving
11/09/11 - Self-Reflection
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10/03/11 - Sangria
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09/18/11 - Hope Springs Eternal
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07/30/11 - Understanding
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07/23/11 - Network
07/22/11 - The Sunshine Boy
07/21/11 - As Seen on TV
07/16/11 - Bringing Up The Rear
07/07/11 - The Bestiality Boys
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06/29/11 - Righty Tighty
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04/29/11 - Blow Hard
04/25/11 - President Trump at the Luxurious Trump Kandahar Hotel
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04/24/11 - Bullseye (Re-Cut)
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04/12/11 - Grasping the Situation
04/12/11 - Jimmy the Appropriate Sportscaster
04/12/11 - Wërkn
04/11/11 - One Person Likes This
04/05/11 - Snap Shot
04/01/11 - A Retraction
03/30/11 - It Also Gives You Wings
03/30/11 - Her Ass Meant
03/22/11 - Dicktation
03/20/11 - Swearing the Hippocratic Oath
03/18/11 - Avoiding Another Meltdown
03/14/11 - How Our Grandparents Calculated Pie
03/11/11 - Jimmy the Appropriate Sportscaster
03/11/11 - Tidy Bowl Man
03/10/11 - Malarkey
03/03/11 - Bespoke
03/02/11 - iSuck
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02/28/11 - Women's Libya
02/27/11 - Putting the Fun in Fundamentalist
02/27/11 - Gateway
02/21/11 - Road Diversion
02/09/11 - Upwardlymobile
02/09/11 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Political Reporter
02/09/11 - The Nuns Predicted This Would Happen
02/01/11 - Hands on a Hardbody
01/30/11 - Days vs Nights
01/22/11 - They All Look Alike to Each Other
01/21/11 - The Most Addicting Popcap Game I've Played
01/19/11 - Everyone is Replaceable
01/16/11 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
01/11/11 - How Pharmaceuticals are Named
01/10/11 - Grey Matter
01/09/11 - One Note Characters
01/06/11 - That's Why
01/03/11 - Ruff
01/03/11 - Relative Dimensions
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12/23/10 - Deep Dickens
12/19/10 - The Great White Clam
12/13/10 - Below the Surface
12/13/10 - Wise Guy
12/13/10 - Certain Point of View
12/12/10 - Oh, Zone
12/10/10 - I'm Not A Lawyer, But I Play One On TV (2)
12/10/10 - I'm Not A Lawyer, But I Play One On TV (1)
12/05/10 - Close Enough
12/05/10 - Eight to One Return
12/02/10 - Menorrahty
11/25/10 - Mouvement Social
11/25/10 - En Garde
11/24/10 - Carma
11/17/10 - The Friendly Skies
11/13/10 - Thanks for Nothing
11/11/10 - The Whistle Blows
10/23/10 - Well Spoken
10/18/10 - Cramp My Style
10/17/10 - FWD: FW: Re: FW: Re: FWD: FWD: Comic
10/10/10 - Resourceful
10/06/10 - Mind the GAAP
10/01/10 - Hot Streak
09/30/10 - Prune Juice
09/09/10 - This Will End Well
08/28/10 - Yellow Brick Road
08/27/10 - Squawk! It's a Living
08/26/10 - Glidrock
08/20/10 - Ma Bell
08/20/10 - Impunity
08/18/10 - Unhappy Hour
08/17/10 - Monday Morning
08/08/10 - Invisible Ink
08/08/10 - Tour de Farce
08/07/10 - Wimpy
08/06/10 - While the Getting is Good
08/06/10 - Heffelump
08/06/10 - No Such Thing As Bad Publicity
08/05/10 - But You Knew That
08/05/10 - Acclaim
08/03/10 - Folgers Crystal
08/03/10 - Bon Voyage
07/29/10 - Scoop
07/27/10 - Support
07/27/10 - Orange, White, and Blue
07/19/10 - It Can Buy Happiness
07/18/10 - Wee Fat
07/17/10 - Feelings
07/16/10 - Site Plan
07/05/10 - Bugged
07/05/10 - Everything I Know I Learned In Kindergarten
07/05/10 - Everything I Know I Learned In Kindergarten
07/05/10 - Everything I Know I Learned In Kindergarten
07/05/10 - Everything I Know I Learned In Kindergarten
07/05/10 - Everything I Know I Learned In Kindergarten
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06/30/10 - Screw Driver
06/30/10 - Evaluation
06/29/10 - Mr. Sensitivity
06/29/10 - Axis
06/23/10 - Captain's Analog
06/19/10 - Nutty
06/18/10 - Deadpan
06/17/10 - Mushi Mushi
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06/13/10 - Abusive Relationships
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06/09/10 - PC 69
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06/08/10 - Opinions
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06/03/10 - Melt
06/01/10 - Darling
05/25/10 - Jurisprudence
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05/17/10 - Munchkin
05/17/10 - Sunny Side Down
05/16/10 - Outwit
05/12/10 - Fucking Windows
05/10/10 - Take Care
05/03/10 - And It's All About That
05/03/10 - But It Comes Around to This
05/03/10 - Sometimes They Go Here
05/03/10 - Then They Wonder This
05/03/10 - First They Say This
04/27/10 - This, That & The Other
04/09/10 - Break Time
04/08/10 - The Tires Aren't The Only Thing That Are Balding
03/31/10 - Simple Ton
03/29/10 - Pooty
03/29/10 - Mad Dog
03/27/10 - HBO Pitch Meeting
03/26/10 - Jitters
03/25/10 - Reflections
03/25/10 - Can You Use It In A Sentence?
03/24/10 - Nod Off
03/18/10 - Fat Chance
03/18/10 - It's Easy Being Green
03/17/10 - Nana Nano
03/08/10 - Cross Words
03/04/10 - Last Supper
03/02/10 - Protoge
02/19/10 - Teletype
02/17/10 - Odds
02/14/10 - News of the Future
02/11/10 - Slide Show
02/08/10 - My Sage Advice
02/01/10 - Vamp
01/31/10 - Cost Prohibitive
01/28/10 - Pop Sensation
01/26/10 - Men Straight
01/24/10 - Knuckle Dragger
01/24/10 - Sweets for the Sweet
01/21/10 - The Buzz on Losing Weight
01/21/10 - Fluff and Fold
01/17/10 - Common Trash
01/17/10 - She's Got it Where it Counts, Kid
01/15/10 - Paper Trained
01/13/10 - Lovey Dovey
01/10/10 - Into the Fold
01/05/10 - Turn On
01/04/10 - Middle East Park
12/29/09 - Aflutter
12/24/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/20/09 - Christmas Goose
12/08/09 - Freeze Tag
12/03/09 - Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
12/03/09 - Maundy Monday
12/02/09 - Casabas
11/28/09 - Teed Off
11/26/09 - Weight Training
11/25/09 - Gymnausium
11/23/09 - Top Gear: Jerusalem
11/18/09 - Bristol Cream
11/17/09 - Before the Cock Crows
11/17/09 - Lidsville
11/17/09 - I Love Going to the Courthouse
11/15/09 - Business Machine
11/13/09 - Values
11/13/09 - Forget About It
11/13/09 - Freejoles
11/11/09 - Shekels
11/06/09 - Surprise Party
10/30/09 - The Outsiders
10/30/09 - Around the World
10/29/09 - Trick
10/29/09 - Written Up
10/29/09 - Going Down in Flames
10/29/09 - Gymnausium
10/24/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/20/09 - Fifteen Minutes and Counting
10/17/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/17/09 - Richard Cabeza
10/15/09 - Blunt Advice
10/14/09 - Horse With No Name
10/10/09 - Torah, Torah, Torah
10/08/09 - This is IT
10/04/09 - The Friendly Skies
10/04/09 - Ep 47: Ward Gives June a Pearl Necklace
10/04/09 - Sweetness
10/04/09 - Milking It
09/24/09 - Crotch Rocket
09/24/09 - Hard Time
09/23/09 - Gymnausium
09/22/09 - Buried Treasure
09/20/09 - PolicÃa Preescolar
09/20/09 - Hit and Miss and Miss and Miss and Miss
09/20/09 - Clone Sex is Like Jerking Yourself Off
09/20/09 - Never Mind the Tracks
09/20/09 - A New Dope
09/20/09 - Why Luke Wanted Off Tatooine
09/18/09 - Movie On
09/17/09 - Worth a Shot
09/11/09 - Plummet
09/11/09 - Never Forget
09/09/09 - Thumbs Up
09/02/09 - Inspired
09/01/09 - 50's Hollywood Logic
08/30/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
08/27/09 - I said, "Good day!"
08/25/09 - Futility Belt
08/17/09 - I Know My Employees
08/17/09 - Delilah
08/15/09 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation
08/15/09 - Putting the Log in Epilogue
08/14/09 - Hearing Aid
08/13/09 - Hai Karate
08/11/09 - Pre-Existing Condition
08/07/09 - Police Woman
08/03/09 - Truncheon Master
08/02/09 - Manos
08/01/09 - The Band I Saw Today
08/01/09 - Low Pile
07/28/09 - Bon Voyager
07/27/09 - The Plane Truth
07/26/09 - Aero Club
07/24/09 - I'm Getting a Certain Reputation (7)
07/22/09 - Joist
07/13/09 - Bring It
07/11/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Art Critic
07/09/09 - Parlor Joke
07/06/09 - Portmanteau Jam
07/03/09 - What Heavy Petting Leads To
07/03/09 - Snow Machine
06/29/09 - It's the Little Things
06/28/09 - Pitch
06/28/09 - Why Purgatory Exists
06/28/09 - Wherein I Become Chris Rock
06/20/09 - Top Hoof
06/17/09 - Blue Eyed Devil
06/15/09 - The Facts of Life Are All About You
06/15/09 - Let Her Rip
06/11/09 - Mearth
06/11/09 - Cockapoo
06/11/09 - Steve and Steve
06/06/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Restaurant Critic
06/01/09 - Logic Bomb
05/31/09 - Little Squirt
05/28/09 - Dickname
05/28/09 - Pitt Stain
05/28/09 - I've Had One of Those Years
05/27/09 - Herb
05/25/09 - The Center of a Dead Planet
05/22/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate White House Correspondent
05/21/09 - Dental Damn
05/21/09 - Haste Makes Waist
05/19/09 - Stimulus
05/19/09 - Bork
05/19/09 - Proposition
05/15/09 - Congress of the Cock
05/14/09 - Domo Arigato Señor Trabajo
05/10/09 - Peloton
05/05/09 - The Bedknobs and Broomsticks Pitch Meeting
05/04/09 - Someone Needs a Spanking
05/04/09 - Boneless
04/26/09 - Cross Circuit
04/26/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
04/26/09 - I Say Wow Every Time
04/21/09 - Destiny
04/19/09 - Kung Fu Grip
04/18/09 - Get a Grip
04/17/09 - Suits Me
04/13/09 - Lotown
04/13/09 - 16 Minutes Later
04/12/09 - Fairy Cotton Tails
04/10/09 - No Glove, No Love
04/09/09 - Local Yokel
04/09/09 - It's Kosher
04/08/09 - On the Loose
04/07/09 - Too Legit to Fit
04/07/09 - Colleagues
04/05/09 - Percolator
04/04/09 - Going Down
04/01/09 - In These Tough Economic Times
03/31/09 - Puffin Job
03/29/09 - I've Been a Bit Sluggish
03/29/09 - Shipping & Handling
03/29/09 - What a Country
03/19/09 - Whole Mulatto Love
03/17/09 - Pearly Gate
03/16/09 - Consigliere
03/11/09 - Music With A Message
03/11/09 - Around the Bend
03/11/09 - Home of the Whopper
03/10/09 - No Green is More Green
03/09/09 - Battle of the Bulge
03/08/09 - Into the Mystic
03/06/09 - Things Are Tough All Over
03/02/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
03/02/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
03/01/09 - Attack of the Clowns
02/24/09 - Black & Tan
02/19/09 - Spreading Democracy
02/12/09 - Gymnausium
02/11/09 - Spare Change
02/07/09 - Twice as Nice
02/06/09 - Goo
02/04/09 - Carnac Desires
02/02/09 - Profiles in Discouragement
02/01/09 - Vaginame
02/01/09 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
01/27/09 - Medieval Knievel
01/26/09 - Not Realistic
01/25/09 - Vacillate Wildly
01/24/09 - Andy Richter Scale
01/20/09 - Term in Office
01/20/09 - Bacon Bits
01/20/09 - Meatball
01/19/09 - Shooting Mel Blancs
01/14/09 - My Neighbor Needs to Close His Blinds
01/12/09 - For Richer or For Dollar Menu
01/11/09 - Bloody Good Time
01/11/09 - loller derby
01/11/09 - Clackers
01/06/09 - Boom Batty
01/05/09 - I'd Buy That For A Dollar
01/05/09 - Eye Queue
01/04/09 - Jehivea's Witness
01/04/09 - Carnac & the Baby Boomer
01/01/09 - Mr. 3,000
01/01/09 - Everything is Bigger in Texas
12/31/08 - Privates
12/31/08 - 2009: No More Bush
12/31/08 - Wheelies
12/31/08 - Stop the Presses
12/29/08 - The Good Bookie
12/29/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/29/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/26/08 - White as a Ghost
12/26/08 - No Litter
12/25/08 - Fa Ra Ra Ra Ra
12/25/08 - My Sister's Holiday Tradition
12/22/08 - News Stories I'd Like to See (5)
12/22/08 - Kids Change You
12/22/08 - Backdraft
12/18/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/17/08 - Flattery Gets Me Somewhere
12/15/08 - Baked Not So Goods
12/15/08 - The Gift that Keeps on Giving
12/11/08 - Two Men Who Love Hats
12/08/08 - Ken & Tina
12/07/08 - Comport
12/01/08 - Let's Jelly Roll
12/01/08 - Gymnausium
12/01/08 - Gymnausium
11/29/08 - Party Pooper
11/28/08 - Everyday Low Values
11/26/08 - Mach Go Go Go!
11/22/08 - Gladiators U.K.
11/22/08 - Classic Body
11/19/08 - Slam Dunkin'
11/16/08 - This Man Considers Her His Trophy Wife
11/13/08 - Edutainment
11/10/08 - I Put the Ass in Aztec
11/10/08 - Worst Buy
11/10/08 - Twitter
11/09/08 - Mii and My Wii
11/09/08 - Economy
11/08/08 - R U Kidding
11/08/08 - Ted Stevens in Jail
11/03/08 - Clothes Unmake the Man
11/02/08 - Isn't it Ironic, Don't You Think?
11/01/08 - Broccoli Beef
10/31/08 - Great Caesar's Ghost
10/30/08 - A Suckling Pig's First Halloween
10/26/08 - Guts & Glory
10/23/08 - Sweater
10/21/08 - Roll on Your Side Effects
10/20/08 - Land of the Flee
10/19/08 - Rear Engine
10/17/08 - Hoover Damn
10/17/08 - Absence Minded
10/16/08 - Custodian of Records
10/16/08 - Bosses Day
10/14/08 - Who's Next
10/14/08 - Crushed
10/13/08 - Highway
10/13/08 - mmmmm, mmyers
10/12/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/12/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/09/08 - Change We Don't Need
10/07/08 - Regularity
10/07/08 - Wasteland
10/06/08 - Obamafamafofama
10/05/08 - Whippet Good
10/05/08 - Legal Tender is the Heart
10/03/08 - What I Heard at Last Night's Stereolab Show
10/03/08 - What I Saw at Tonight's Stereolab Show
10/02/08 - It Pays to Tip Well
10/02/08 - Red Skin
09/30/08 - Putting the Mute in Mutant
09/29/08 - Air Sickness
09/28/08 - T.S.A. Holes
09/28/08 - Get a Rope
09/26/08 - Blow, Man, Blow
09/26/08 - C is Average
09/25/08 - Beyond Punderdome
09/24/08 - Ask Me About My Grandkids
09/24/08 - Speaking of Train Wrecks
09/21/08 - Ninja Please
09/21/08 - Longshanks
09/20/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
09/18/08 - Reap What, You Sow?
09/18/08 - Static Shock
09/15/08 - Uncle Vampire
09/14/08 - Going Topless
09/13/08 - Wishes
09/13/08 - Carpet Bomb
09/12/08 - Perquisites
09/12/08 - Salute
09/11/08 - Baby Busters
09/11/08 - Immoral Victory
09/11/08 - Presenting
09/11/08 - Up a Creak
09/11/08 - Ground Zero My Hero
09/11/08 - A Man's Reach Should Exceed His Grasp
09/09/08 - Hot Plate
09/09/08 - Abandonment
09/08/08 - Ain't Getting Nun
09/07/08 - On the Campaign Tail
09/07/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
09/07/08 - Bleeding Red State
09/07/08 - Cue Gamera Three
09/04/08 - C.P.O. Snarky
09/03/08 - Palin Comparison
09/03/08 - Peacock
09/02/08 - Endora!
09/01/08 - Core Beliefs
09/01/08 - Order Up
08/31/08 - liveoffensively.com
08/31/08 - I Beg Your Pardon
08/31/08 - Long's Time Coming
08/30/08 - In Case You Don't Know
08/25/08 - Prospecting
08/24/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Olympic Sportscaster
08/23/08 - Where The Heart Is
08/22/08 - To Each His Own
08/22/08 - Pornacular
08/22/08 - Press, Your Luck
08/21/08 - Imbalance Beam
08/21/08 - Something Next to Nothing
08/19/08 - Off the Bench
08/19/08 - Red, White, & Boo
08/18/08 - Gymnausium
08/18/08 - Jurisprudence
08/17/08 - Sunday Smackdown
08/16/08 - Blue Streak
08/16/08 - Consumption Junction
08/16/08 - Deep in the African Bush
08/14/08 - Permission Slip
08/13/08 - True Tales of Job Interviews (15)
08/12/08 - True Tales of Job Interviews (14)
08/10/08 - Five Year Mission
08/07/08 - I Hate Their Tacos, Okay?
08/06/08 - Conga Line
08/02/08 - Al Z. Heimers
07/24/08 - Never Mind That Shit, Here Comes Mongoloid
07/24/08 - Shave and a Hair Cut
07/22/08 - Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 6
07/21/08 - Milton Berle Stole Jokes
07/20/08 - Hindsight
07/20/08 - Half a World Away
07/18/08 - I Ride My Bike on Fridays
07/16/08 - Plodding Plotting
07/16/08 - Get Cracking
07/15/08 - Skip Forward to Exodus 20:12
07/15/08 - People Tell Me Things Redux
07/15/08 - Screen Shot
07/14/08 - Chance of Snow
07/13/08 - Kung Fool
07/13/08 - Boner
07/11/08 - King Ralph
07/10/08 - I Put the Vag in Vasovagal Response
07/08/08 - Gymnausium
07/07/08 - Wined Up
07/07/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/07/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/07/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/07/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/07/08 - Slip On, Slip By
07/05/08 - Who Knew He Had Dementia?
07/04/08 - Meet the New King George, Same as the Old King George
07/02/08 - Sensitize
06/30/08 - Hang a B.A.
06/30/08 - Virtuous Reality
06/30/08 - Hablo Job
06/30/08 - I Know What I Like
06/29/08 - Give Me Some Sugar
06/29/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
06/23/08 - Observational Comedy
06/22/08 - Velvet Fog
06/21/08 - Carbon Dating
06/21/08 - Cock Tale
06/20/08 - Emotional Scar Tissue
06/19/08 - In Demand
06/18/08 - Hair Don't
06/18/08 - My Year in Review
06/18/08 - Tighten the Beltway
06/16/08 - Kiss the Cook
06/16/08 - Princess and the Pea
06/15/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
06/14/08 - Immaturation
06/13/08 - Sticky Situation
06/12/08 - Satisfying
06/12/08 - Controlled Substance
06/12/08 - I'll Bet He Gets This A Lot
06/10/08 - Wonder
06/08/08 - I Love Company
06/04/08 - Ask a Stupid Question
05/29/08 - One for the Vault
05/29/08 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
05/29/08 - The Real Deal
05/28/08 - He's Never Heard This Before
05/28/08 - Incidentals
05/26/08 - Radish
05/24/08 - Deploy the Fleet
05/21/08 - Bullseye
05/20/08 - Happy Hour
05/20/08 - Gymnausium
05/19/08 - Go Do That Voodoo
05/19/08 - Spies Like Us
05/15/08 - Best Week Ever
05/11/08 - Combo #2
05/11/08 - Devil With A Blue Dress
05/08/08 - Groomed
05/06/08 - Gymnausium
04/28/08 - The Audition
04/27/08 - New Sheriff In Town
04/27/08 - Nozzle
04/26/08 - I Get Away With It
04/23/08 - Vibrant Freshness
04/23/08 - My American Life
04/21/08 - Business Casual
04/18/08 - Over and Over
04/15/08 - Gods and Clods
04/14/08 - Navigator
04/12/08 - Kick Out the Jams
04/10/08 - Detritus
04/08/08 - Gymnausium
04/04/08 - Mocking Bird
03/30/08 - Shift Knob
03/28/08 - I Never Promised You A Rose Garden
03/28/08 - Hanging Out With My Staff
03/28/08 - Polish
03/27/08 - Not Down With O.P.P.
03/22/08 - Udder Failure
03/22/08 - Adult Swim
03/20/08 - Nice Basket
03/20/08 - Mission Accomplished
03/17/08 - Apply Within
03/17/08 - Gymnausium
03/16/08 - Low/Mid Rise
03/15/08 - Gymnausium
03/12/08 - Gymnausium
03/11/08 - Hoi Polloi
03/11/08 - Dial Spin
03/10/08 - Stop Making Scents
03/09/08 - Practical Environmental Tips
03/09/08 - Practical Environmental Tips
03/09/08 - Gentlemen
03/05/08 - Gymnausium
03/05/08 - Gymnausium
02/27/08 - Fold, Spindle, Mutilate
02/25/08 - Gymnausium
02/24/08 - Fragrance
02/17/08 - Second-Hand Smoke and Mirrors
02/12/08 - Authority
02/10/08 - Brain Drain
02/09/08 - See Ya Later, Kegerator
02/08/08 - Nice Poll
02/05/08 - Good to Good
02/05/08 - Swamped
02/02/08 - The Apple of Her Eye
02/01/08 - Boom vs Bust
02/01/08 - Mind the Gap
02/01/08 - Raconteur
02/01/08 - Three Minutes
01/28/08 - Leaving the Gym
01/27/08 - Twenty Years of Mom Jokes and Counting
01/21/08 - Progress
01/20/08 - I'm Not Avove Heckling
01/15/08 - Leaving the Gym (2)
01/13/08 - Skating By
01/07/08 - Leave it to Barbra
01/05/08 - Leaving the Gym
01/05/08 - My Trainer Pirates Music
01/04/08 - My Home State
01/03/08 - Robots Have Feelings, Too
01/01/08 - Don't Phunk With My Heart
12/30/07 - Lean and Mean
12/29/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/28/07 - Joining the Gym (67)
12/28/07 - Fromagerie
12/27/07 - Convenience
12/26/07 - Enough Already
12/26/07 - Back to the Workshop
12/24/07 - Parts is Parts
12/23/07 - Cervezaaaaaaah
12/23/07 - Twas the Night Before The Night Before Christmas
12/20/07 - Gunt Control
12/20/07 - Deck the Challs
12/19/07 - Joining the Gym (66)
12/19/07 - Unneighborly
12/19/07 - Joining the Gym (65)
12/19/07 - The Blathering Inferno
12/18/07 - That's How I Jelly Roll
12/17/07 - I, Clarkson
12/17/07 - Joining the Gym (64)
12/11/07 - The Unfriendly Skies
12/11/07 - Hellmark
12/09/07 - They Call Him Flipper
12/09/07 - Surprise and Fear
12/06/07 - Card Stock
12/05/07 - Drawn Out
12/04/07 - Bomb Scare
12/04/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
12/04/07 - Thin to Win
12/01/07 - Look, Sir--Droids
12/01/07 - Everything is Going to be Obee Kabee
12/01/07 - Playing God
12/01/07 - Cum on Feel the Silenze
12/01/07 - Snake River
11/29/07 - The Human Stain
11/28/07 - Holiday Cheer
11/27/07 - Back Pedaling
11/22/07 - 1967
11/21/07 - Young Amy Winehouse
11/18/07 - William Shat 'n 'er
11/17/07 - Amen
11/17/07 - 13th Grade
11/15/07 - The Butt of the Joke
11/14/07 - Joining the Gym (63)
11/14/07 - Joining the Gym (62)
11/13/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
11/12/07 - I Know My Friends
11/03/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/30/07 - Krab
10/29/07 - Just One of the Guys
10/24/07 - Situation Normal
10/24/07 - Everything's Fine Here
10/24/07 - Disco Inferno
10/24/07 - The Sky Looked Like This Background Too!
10/24/07 - Expectations
10/24/07 - Grab and Go
10/24/07 - Chow Bella
10/24/07 - Empty Nest
10/24/07 - Perchance to Dream
10/24/07 - To Sleep
10/24/07 - The Worst Thing She Could Say
10/23/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/07 - Scram
10/18/07 - Sometimes I Keep My Thoughts To Myself
10/16/07 - Koala
10/16/07 - Congress of the Crow
10/15/07 - Slop
10/15/07 - The Dulling Edge
10/06/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/04/07 - Ooze
10/04/07 - How Christians Say Fuck You
10/04/07 - Ribeye of the Tiger
10/02/07 - Meta Thing
09/29/07 - Grunt Work
09/29/07 - Baby One More Time
09/28/07 - In a Dander
09/27/07 - Sartre Trek: The Final Frontier
09/27/07 - Sartre Trek: The Next Generation
09/27/07 - Sartre Trek
09/27/07 - Premise: Conclusion
09/26/07 - Sometimes You Gotta Do Whom You Gotta Do
09/26/07 - Tight Rope
09/25/07 - Zoom
09/24/07 - Mime of Our Lives
09/22/07 - Stand Up Comedy
09/22/07 - Saab Story
09/18/07 - Get With the Program
09/17/07 - Padded Cell Conversations
09/17/07 - Jury Doodie
09/17/07 - What I've Been Doing All Week
09/17/07 - Disorder in the Court
09/16/07 - The Stripcreator Unemployment Office
09/16/07 - Mix-Up
09/15/07 - Evolution
09/15/07 - Distractions
09/15/07 - Marge Sleeps Around
09/15/07 - The Carpenter's Apprentice
09/15/07 - Scavenger Hunt
09/11/07 - Lift
09/11/07 - 9-11 Odds
09/10/07 - Really...I Was Playing With The Dog
09/09/07 - Swaddling
09/09/07 - The Meek
09/09/07 - Loop
09/08/07 - Dogma
09/08/07 - Exploring the Heavens
09/08/07 - Screaming Kids
09/06/07 - Morbidity
09/06/07 - In Common
09/05/07 - Backing Out
09/04/07 - How I Feel About Craigslist
09/04/07 - How I Feel About Junk Mail
08/31/07 - Princess Died
08/29/07 - XXX-Ray
08/29/07 - Stall Tactics
08/26/07 - Poverty Schmoverty
08/26/07 - Mudflaps
08/26/07 - Le Petit Morte
08/26/07 - Chance
08/26/07 - Cottage Cheese
08/25/07 - None of a Kind
08/25/07 - Pat on the Back
08/25/07 - Substance Abuse
08/25/07 - Be It Ever So Humble
08/24/07 - Labor Relations
08/19/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
08/18/07 - Lice Ball
08/16/07 - A Tear in Space
08/15/07 - My Employees Love My Analogies
08/13/07 - Creature from the Red, White, and Blue Lagoon
08/13/07 - Doggy Bags
08/13/07 - Vacation Hell
08/09/07 - Tomorrow's Opening Line
08/09/07 - Curveball
08/08/07 - Joining the Gym (61)
08/07/07 - Kicking and Screaming
08/07/07 - Joining the Gym (60)
08/07/07 - Joining the Gym (59)
08/07/07 - Discontinental Divide
08/05/07 - The New Flame
07/31/07 - Rock On
07/31/07 - Let's All Go to the Lobby
07/31/07 - I Got My Mojo Workin'
07/29/07 - DC = Doomed Citizens
07/28/07 - Just Once, I'd Like an Apology
07/27/07 - Soy Frijoles!
07/26/07 - Someone Put Him Up To It
07/25/07 - Let 'er Rip
07/25/07 - Joining the Gym (58)
07/24/07 - Distrito Colon
07/23/07 - Two Acquaintances Trying To Fake The Effort
07/22/07 - Fizzy Lifting Drinks
07/22/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/22/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
07/22/07 - That's the Problem
07/16/07 - Is this MicBot On?
07/16/07 - Can I Grab You for a Moment?
07/11/07 - The South--It May Be Hot, But It's A Wet Heat
07/11/07 - Right Up Her Alley
07/08/07 - Silence
07/02/07 - Pay $200 to State the Obvious
06/30/07 - Dix
06/29/07 - Efficiency Expert
06/29/07 - Pro Lapse
06/23/07 - The Better Half
06/23/07 - Mach Go Go Go
06/23/07 - Abstract
06/22/07 - A Real Cut Up
06/21/07 - I'd Rather Be An Orphan
06/20/07 - Attrition
06/20/07 - Claim Jumper
06/19/07 - Squatting Rights
06/19/07 - Joining the Gym (57)
06/17/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
06/17/07 - 12 Step Saver
06/17/07 - You're Fire(d)
06/17/07 - Head to Work
06/11/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
06/08/07 - You're Soaking In It
06/07/07 - SigAlert
06/05/07 - Case Study
06/03/07 - Hey, Big Spender
06/03/07 - Wizard of Ego
06/02/07 - Robottom
06/02/07 - Fish in a Barrel
06/02/07 - Raspy
05/31/07 - Volume, Volume, Volume
05/30/07 - A Battle of Wizz
05/29/07 - The Cankle Bone's Connected to the Thalf Bone
05/29/07 - Brown Out
05/29/07 - Four-Day Weekend
05/27/07 - Self-Unconscious
05/23/07 - Toppings
05/23/07 - Que Syrah Syrah
05/22/07 - Czech and Mate
05/19/07 - Mr. Badwrench
05/19/07 - Let it Roll
05/18/07 - Helping Hand
05/18/07 - Bowl Movement
05/15/07 - I Blame the Juice
05/14/07 - Joining the Gym (56)
05/13/07 - Proportion
05/13/07 - Squelch
05/13/07 - Mum Is Not TheWord
05/12/07 - Losin' It
05/12/07 - Joining the Gym (55)
05/09/07 - News Stories I'd Like to See (4)
05/09/07 - News Stories I'd Like to See (3)
05/09/07 - News Stories I'd Like to See (2)
05/09/07 - News Stories I'd Like to See (1)
05/05/07 - All Wet
05/01/07 - Do As I Say, Not As I Say
05/01/07 - Support Staff
04/30/07 - I Can Finally Make This Comic
04/29/07 - Toner it Down
04/29/07 - Vet Your Vet
04/29/07 - Me-OW!
04/26/07 - Joining the Gym (54)
04/25/07 - Joining the Gym (53)
04/23/07 - Joining the Gym (52)
04/23/07 - Profiles in Followship
04/23/07 - Countdown
04/22/07 - Le Migre
04/22/07 - Why Nobody Shops With Me
04/21/07 - Planet B
04/18/07 - Phil O'Pino
04/16/07 - The Twist
04/15/07 - Echelon
04/15/07 - Not My Type
04/14/07 - Nobody Thinks of Chaplain or Hardy
04/12/07 - Delay of Game
04/10/07 - Joining the Gym (51)
04/09/07 - Donna
04/09/07 - High Octane Comedy
04/09/07 - The Revolution Will Not Be Motorized
04/08/07 - Tiny Portions of Bad Food
04/08/07 - What Would Jesus Drink?
04/04/07 - Casual Wednesday
04/03/07 - Furry Movie Reviews
04/01/07 - Laying Cable
03/31/07 - Dust to Dust
03/31/07 - Alsace-Lorraine
03/31/07 - Yeah, I Wear a Suit on Saturday Mornings
03/30/07 - Henry Tooter
03/30/07 - Pumping Up
03/28/07 - Lockstep
03/28/07 - Snow Job
03/28/07 - Surge-ery
03/24/07 - Won't You Be My Neighbor
03/24/07 - Peel Out
03/24/07 - The Sound and the Fury
03/22/07 - Nice & Quiet
03/22/07 - Preaching to the Choir
03/19/07 - By the Book
03/16/07 - Facing the Music
03/16/07 - 0.001% of His Commission
03/14/07 - Joining the Gym (50)
03/13/07 - Joining the Gym (49)
03/12/07 - Drop Dead Date
03/08/07 - Going Problem
03/08/07 - Small Wonder
03/06/07 - Face Time
03/06/07 - DWB
03/06/07 - Famous for Being Famous
03/06/07 - Joining the Gym (48)
03/05/07 - Joining the Gym (47)
03/05/07 - Let the Eagle Soar
03/05/07 - The Inquisition
03/04/07 - 8 Hot Dogs, 12 Buns
03/04/07 - At Least I Was Polite About It
03/04/07 - Appetizer
03/04/07 - Friends with Kids
03/04/07 - Airportly
03/03/07 - Persnickety
03/03/07 - Whatever Suits You
03/02/07 - Grouper
03/02/07 - Nocturnal Submission
03/01/07 - Coma Chameleon
02/26/07 - Objective Taste
02/26/07 - In the Gaytto
02/25/07 - Turn-Key
02/25/07 - Car Wars
02/25/07 - Bore-ito
02/25/07 - Bauhaus Isn't Just A Goth Band
02/23/07 - Initial Shock
02/20/07 - Dotting the Tees and Crossing the Eyes
02/19/07 - Rock Me, Dr. Zaius
02/19/07 - You Want Some Sweet Tea?
02/16/07 - Doctor Who?
02/16/07 - A Cautionary Tale
02/16/07 - Hairy & David
02/12/07 - Watch the S*** Grow
02/12/07 - Suck Bot
02/12/07 - Appetite for Destruction
02/11/07 - Real Assets
02/08/07 - A Friend Indeed
02/06/07 - Zero Tolerance
02/06/07 - Your Circuit's Dead, There's Something Wrong
02/06/07 - Coming to Capistrano
02/04/07 - The Problem With Superbowl Parties
02/02/07 - In Passing
02/02/07 - Chronic Disorder
01/31/07 - Our Daily Bread
01/30/07 - All Wet
01/30/07 - Joining the Gym (46)
01/30/07 - Joining the Gym (45)
01/28/07 - What I've Always Wanted
01/28/07 - Caveat Emptor
01/28/07 - Sharing is Caring
01/25/07 - Parochial
01/23/07 - Advantage
01/23/07 - Joining the Gym (44)
01/22/07 - Token
01/22/07 - Taking a Bath
01/22/07 - Faux Sale by Owner
01/18/07 - Overload
01/17/07 - The Place I Go for Lunch
01/16/07 - Scare Tactics
01/16/07 - Holy Crap
01/15/07 - When The Whistle Blows
01/11/07 - Robotic Law
01/11/07 - Murder Most Fowl
01/08/07 - Parabolic
01/07/07 - Patching Things Up
01/06/07 - My Future
01/05/07 - State of Education
01/04/07 - Pie in the Window
01/03/07 - Joining the Gym (43)
01/02/07 - Ray Milland & Rosey Grier
01/01/07 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
01/01/07 - 2007 Sports Prediction
12/30/06 - I Just Know
12/29/06 - Unreal Estate
12/27/06 - He Must Be Tripping in His Grave
12/25/06 - The Soul of the Godfather of Soul
12/23/06 - Looking Down on Creation
12/23/06 - Top of the World
12/23/06 - Christmas Eve Forecast
12/23/06 - Many Happy Returns
12/23/06 - The War on Christmas to End all Wars on Christmases
12/23/06 - Christmas Wars IV (A New Hope)
12/23/06 - War on Christmas III
12/23/06 - War on Christmas II
12/23/06 - War on Christmas
12/23/06 - On Top of the North Pole
12/22/06 - Unrealtor
12/20/06 - Toning it Down
12/17/06 - What it's Like Getting Together with Old Friends Now
12/16/06 - I'm Lovin' It
12/15/06 - Paper or Plastic?
12/15/06 - Tidy Bowel
12/13/06 - Holiday Routine
12/13/06 - 'Tis the Season to be Jolly
12/11/06 - Every Time I Go to the Post Office
12/08/06 - No Need to Panic
12/08/06 - Emergency Response
12/06/06 - Rock Steady
12/04/06 - Joining the Gym (43)
12/04/06 - Howard's Johnson
11/29/06 - Location, Location, Location
11/28/06 - Bioterrorism
11/27/06 - Go Army
11/27/06 - 23 < 0
11/25/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
11/25/06 - Family Ties
11/24/06 - Soul Hunter
11/24/06 - Cripples & Indians
11/24/06 - Get a Clue
11/18/06 - Everyday Low Prices
11/18/06 - Sole Man
11/18/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
11/17/06 - Wished Into the Cornfield
11/17/06 - Chat Chappeau
11/17/06 - Ocean View!
11/16/06 - Going to Waste
11/15/06 - Whatever Suits You
11/15/06 - King Kong Balls
11/15/06 - Joining the Gym (42)
11/14/06 - French Tips
11/07/06 - Messy Campaign
11/05/06 - Whacks On, Whacks Off
11/05/06 - Strange Bedfellows
11/04/06 - Cat Scan
11/02/06 - Cover
10/31/06 - A Fine Hallow
10/29/06 - More Stadium Concessions
10/25/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/25/06 - You're Listening to K.R.A.P.
10/24/06 - Rationale
10/23/06 - Grass Roots Leadership
10/23/06 - Onwards and Sidewards
10/23/06 - Face the Music
10/22/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/06 - Jimmy the Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/06 - Jimmy The Inappropriate Sportscaster
10/22/06 - Stadium Concessions
10/20/06 - Mothers Against Disabled Drivers
10/18/06 - Old Shul
10/16/06 - What Color is Your Chute?
10/16/06 - Joining the Gym (41)
10/16/06 - Joining the Gym (40)
10/15/06 - The Blame Game
10/15/06 - Hiding In Plain Sight
10/14/06 - Bon Natale
10/13/06 - Fists of Furry
10/13/06 - Statistics
10/13/06 - I'm a Fucking Self-Rightous Prick
10/10/06 - Clock Sucker
10/08/06 - Cannon Fodder
10/04/06 - Affirmative Action
10/04/06 - Great Moments in Legislative History
10/02/06 - So Much for the City
10/01/06 - Got Any Gum?
10/01/06 - Prince of Tights
09/28/06 - Aspirations
09/24/06 - Much Too Much
09/24/06 - Fanatics
09/22/06 - Everything Changes
09/22/06 - Keeping Up Appearances
09/20/06 - I Love craigslist Too Much
09/20/06 - I Love craigslist
09/18/06 - Joining the Gym (39)
09/17/06 - Gentlemen, Stop Your Engines
09/17/06 - Serf's Up
09/17/06 - Cavity Creep
09/16/06 - Carnac Knowledge
09/16/06 - Advertising
09/15/06 - I Love craigslist
09/15/06 - I Love craigslist
09/15/06 - I Love craigslist
09/15/06 - Strange Bedfellows
09/13/06 - Seldom is Heard an Encouraging Word
09/12/06 - Gravity Gets You Down
09/12/06 - Try the Kaufmanicotti
09/11/06 - Snooze
09/11/06 - Decrepit
09/11/06 - The Omen
09/10/06 - Tribute
09/08/06 - Current Events
09/07/06 - Bad Enough for Government Work
09/06/06 - Doing the Impossible
09/06/06 - Legacy
09/05/06 - Disposable
09/05/06 - Bungee Boss
09/04/06 - Golden Slumbers
09/02/06 - Hyperspace
08/29/06 - YOUR Taxdollars at Work
08/28/06 - The Lord Will Come Upon You
08/27/06 - Mr. Clean
08/27/06 - Recursive
08/26/06 - Mystery Solved
08/24/06 - Monkey See, Monkey Don't
08/24/06 - Back Up Plan
08/24/06 - Width is More Important
08/14/06 - Joining the Gym (38)
08/14/06 - Having Your Cake and Eating it Too
08/12/06 - Don't Kill the Messenger Bag
08/10/06 - Joining the Gym (37)
08/08/06 - Buffeteria
08/08/06 - Voiceover--We're Getting Involved with You
08/08/06 - Voiceover--Fucking Ponderous
08/08/06 - Voiceover--Crumb Crisp Coating
08/08/06 - Voiceover--Don't Tell Me How To Do It (It Sickens Me)
08/08/06 - Voiceover--Unrewarding
08/05/06 - Foul Smelling Discharge
08/04/06 - Big Baby
08/03/06 - Secret Identity
08/02/06 - Going Down
08/02/06 - Joining the Gym (36)
08/02/06 - Take Care
08/01/06 - Better Red than Red
07/31/06 - Indications
07/31/06 - I Need to Self-Censor More
07/29/06 - Face Time
07/26/06 - Carnac & the Ass of Bass
07/16/06 - Six of One Half
07/13/06 - Mindset to Cycle
07/12/06 - Limited Options
07/12/06 - Remember to Fill Out the Evaluation
07/12/06 - Time Release
07/12/06 - Smells Like Adult Spirit
07/12/06 - $5.48 per Page
07/11/06 - My Particular Idiom
07/11/06 - Accommodations
07/07/06 - Vrrrrrp
07/07/06 - Axis Mundi
07/07/06 - July 7, 2005
07/05/06 - Blast Off
07/04/06 - Putting the Folly in Follicle
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (8)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (7)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (6)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (5)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (4)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (3)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (2)
07/04/06 - Frozen in Time (1)
06/30/06 - Putting the Hole in Frijoles
06/27/06 - Putting the Tired in Retired
06/27/06 - Wherein I Become Romy White
06/22/06 - The Techs Don't Like Me Anymore (3)
06/22/06 - The Techs Don't Like Me Anymore (2)
06/22/06 - The Techs Don't Like Me Anymore (1)
06/22/06 - Throwing It Back
06/21/06 - Feedback
06/20/06 - Fox in the Henhouse
06/20/06 - Gurgle
06/20/06 - Surreptitious
06/20/06 - Such a Deal
06/20/06 - We Don't Hang Out Anymore
06/19/06 - Pole Position (4)
06/19/06 - Pole Position (3)
06/19/06 - Pole Position (2)
06/19/06 - Redundancy
06/17/06 - Lounge Lizard
06/15/06 - Pole Position
06/14/06 - Processor
06/13/06 - Senioritis
06/13/06 - Gold Rush
06/13/06 - Home of the Whopper
06/13/06 - Joining the Gym (35)
06/12/06 - Moojahideen
06/09/06 - Grooming
06/06/06 - The Last Resort
06/05/06 - My Regards
05/31/06 - Joining the Gym (34)
05/30/06 - F@%! Scott Fitzgerald
05/30/06 - Coffee Achiever
05/26/06 - Perks
05/26/06 - Coin Toss
05/24/06 - Spin
05/24/06 - Entitlements
05/24/06 - Trickle Down
05/23/06 - Succession
05/23/06 - Treatment
05/18/06 - That's the Rub--Epilogue
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (10)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (9)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (8)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (7)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (6)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (5)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (4)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (3)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (2)
05/18/06 - That's the Rub (1)
05/18/06 - Shotgun
05/18/06 - She's Back
05/18/06 - Joining the Gym (33)
05/18/06 - Joining the Gym (32)
05/18/06 - When Tourists Visit San Diego
05/18/06 - A Quick Brown Dog Jumped Over Vicente Fox
05/16/06 - Cum Laude
05/15/06 - World's Worst Monk
05/15/06 - Joining the Gym (31)
05/14/06 - World's Worst Ninja
05/14/06 - You Oughta Know By Now
05/13/06 - Giving The Shaft
05/13/06 - Footsteps
05/12/06 - Pennsylvania Ave 6-5000
05/11/06 - Gouge
05/11/06 - I've Been A Bitch All Week
05/08/06 - iTune Out
05/08/06 - Joining the Gym (30)
05/07/06 - Tomorrow, I Win the Lumbergh Award
05/07/06 - Selection
05/03/06 - Every Restaurant in San Diego
05/02/06 - Regurgitation
05/01/06 - I Really Saw This
05/01/06 - Golden Handshake
05/01/06 - Rally
04/28/06 - Air of Distinction
04/28/06 - Yo Ho
04/28/06 - Composition
04/28/06 - Side Effects May Include Euphoria
04/28/06 - Sugarcoat
04/28/06 - I Play Joke
04/28/06 - Macromanage
04/27/06 - Good Chance
04/24/06 - A Little TLC
04/24/06 - Greatest Hits
04/24/06 - Really, It's a Good Car
04/23/06 - Target Rich Environment
04/22/06 - Generation Gap
04/20/06 - Joining the Gym (29)
04/18/06 - Transitions
04/18/06 - Truth Syrum
04/17/06 - Living Vicariously
04/17/06 - Karma Chameleon
04/14/06 - Hallelujah
04/13/06 - Image is Everything
04/12/06 - My Local Health Food Store
04/11/06 - Off the Top of My Head
04/10/06 - Variety is the Spice of Life
04/07/06 - Fists of Fury
04/03/06 - Ethos
03/28/06 - More Biblical Outtakes
03/28/06 - Standing Up
03/28/06 - Biblical Outtakes
03/27/06 - Joining the Gym (28)
03/24/06 - Terroir
03/23/06 - Blackmail
03/22/06 - Perpetual Motion
03/22/06 - After Asian Market
03/22/06 - At The Asian Market
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (6)
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (5)
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (4)
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (3)
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (2)
03/18/06 - Re-Tale (1)
03/18/06 - The Truth Hurts
03/16/06 - Snake Charmer
03/14/06 - It Was Good
03/14/06 - Open House
03/14/06 - Continuing the Tour
03/14/06 - Shop Talk
03/13/06 - Joining the Gym (27)
03/13/06 - Joining the Gym (26)
03/13/06 - Collective Bargaining
03/13/06 - I Blame The Baby Boomers
03/09/06 - For Crying Out Loud
03/08/06 - Recant
03/07/06 - Voir Dire
03/02/06 - Passing on the Religious Right
02/28/06 - I'm Giving These Jokes Up For Lent
02/28/06 - Joining the Gym (25)
02/27/06 - Church Clothes
02/25/06 - Funeral Follies
02/25/06 - Dearly Beloved
02/25/06 - Crutch
02/24/06 - Jelly Role
02/23/06 - Good Mourning
02/21/06 - How Much Does a Hemingway?
02/17/06 - Friends with Benefits
02/17/06 - Unload
02/17/06 - Hostess With The Mostess
02/17/06 - Bone Appetite
02/17/06 - Germination
02/17/06 - Dig This
02/15/06 - Last Minute Gift
02/15/06 - Thank Me Later
02/14/06 - Frozen Water Sports
02/13/06 - Self-Censorship
02/13/06 - Profiles in Adequacy
02/11/06 - Perspicacity
02/09/06 - Le Professeur
02/09/06 - Starbucks of New England
02/07/06 - Old Dog, Old Tricks
02/06/06 - At The Mecca County Fair
02/06/06 - Diplomatic Immunity
02/06/06 - Joining the Gym (24)
02/06/06 - Service With A Smile
02/06/06 - Ratio
02/05/06 - True Fans
02/04/06 - Backdrop
02/04/06 - Thin Walls, Thick Skin
02/04/06 - Sixty Percent
02/03/06 - Something Smells
02/02/06 - Life Saver
02/01/06 - Static Charge
02/01/06 - Slacks
01/30/06 - I Still Don't Know Why I Said This
01/30/06 - Did Everyone's Parents Do This?
01/30/06 - The Last Time I Got Spanked
01/29/06 - Get Biblical On Your Ass
01/29/06 - It's All In The Execution
01/28/06 - Joining the Gym (23)
01/27/06 - Holy Crap
01/26/06 - I'm Feeling Supersonic
01/26/06 - Joining the Gym (22)
01/26/06 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (6)
01/24/06 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (5)
01/24/06 - Polyphonic Shooting Spree
01/24/06 - Joining the Gym (21)
01/24/06 - Pet Shop Sounds
01/23/06 - Joining the Gym (20)
01/22/06 - To Boldly Google
01/18/06 - Somewhere in Talk Show Heaven
01/17/06 - Intervention
01/17/06 - Mount Krackatoa
01/17/06 - Attrition
01/16/06 - Getting the MLK for Free
01/16/06 - Great Expectations
01/13/06 - Afternoon Delight
01/12/06 - Heavy Meddle
01/05/06 - Winter in San Diego
01/04/06 - Easy Money
01/04/06 - Feifdom
01/04/06 - Kingdom Come
01/03/06 - Joining the Gym (20)
01/02/06 - Joining the Gym (19)
01/02/06 - In The Beginning
12/31/05 - Love It Or Leave It
12/30/05 - One Night In College...
12/30/05 - If Bobby Brown Went On A Game Show
12/27/05 - Philander
12/26/05 - Longevity
12/21/05 - Wise Guy
12/21/05 - Poor Rudolph
12/19/05 - Season's Greetings
12/17/05 - The Insider
12/17/05 - Spirit of Christmas
12/17/05 - Trough
12/17/05 - Joining the Gym (18)
12/16/05 - Zero Based Management
12/15/05 - Chappy Cholidays
12/15/05 - All That Glitters Is Not Golding
12/15/05 - Tis The Season To Be Jolly
12/15/05 - When You Care Enough To Send The Very Least
12/15/05 - Clothes Make The Man
12/12/05 - Silver Lining
12/12/05 - Lies, Lies, Lies
12/12/05 - The Emperor's Old Clothes
12/12/05 - A Cheeky Tale
12/12/05 - Joining the Gym (17)
12/11/05 - Gift Horse
12/11/05 - Put Me Into My Misery
12/11/05 - Mr. Generosity
12/08/05 - That's The Spirit
12/08/05 - Pat On The Back
12/06/05 - This Comic Has Not Been Evaluated By The FDA
12/05/05 - Prominence
12/05/05 - Mindless Dribble
12/05/05 - Wrinkles in Time
12/04/05 - Don't Forget The Bon-Bons
12/03/05 - We Have A Chance To Find The Sunshine
12/01/05 - Putting the Men in Menopause
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (7)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (6)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (5)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (4)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (3)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (2)
11/30/05 - The Evaluator (1)
11/30/05 - Deaf Comedy Jam
11/29/05 - Biggerest Loser
11/29/05 - Biggest Loser Finale
11/29/05 - Half Full
11/28/05 - Pulling Your Crank
11/27/05 - Happies
11/26/05 - Survivor
11/26/05 - The Source
11/25/05 - Brown Sugar
11/25/05 - True Grit
11/25/05 - True Lies
11/25/05 - Internal Affairs
11/25/05 - Street Angel
11/25/05 - You Wear It Well
11/25/05 - I Can See For Miles Standish
11/24/05 - Pie Hole
11/24/05 - Thankstaking
11/23/05 - Cost Benefit Analysis
11/23/05 - Joining the Gym (16)
11/23/05 - Joining the Gym (15)
11/23/05 - What I'm Thankful For
11/23/05 - Holiday Cheer
11/23/05 - Listings
11/22/05 - Mitten
11/16/05 - Streetlight Symphony
11/16/05 - Mr. Enthusiasm
11/16/05 - Civil Union
11/14/05 - Joining the Gym (14)
11/13/05 - Joining the Gym (13)
11/12/05 - Joining the Gym (12)
11/12/05 - Single Shot
11/10/05 - Ships in the Night
11/09/05 - Joining the Gym (11)
11/09/05 - Largess
11/09/05 - We're Not Worthy
11/09/05 - Release the Hound
11/09/05 - Joining the Gym (10)
11/05/05 - Close-Up: Asian Porn
11/05/05 - Joining the Gym (9)
11/05/05 - Kill The Messenger
11/03/05 - Free Press
11/03/05 - The Best Conversation I've Ever Had At Work
11/02/05 - The Wasteland
11/02/05 - Sabbatical
10/31/05 - Joining the Gym (8)
10/31/05 - The Sickening
10/30/05 - No Treat
10/30/05 - La Cerveza Mas Fina
10/30/05 - Longevity
10/30/05 - Dress Up
10/26/05 - Lost In The Desert
10/25/05 - The Fats of Life
10/24/05 - Essential Doodies
10/24/05 - Thriller
10/22/05 - Jeux Sans Frontieres
10/20/05 - Transport Her
10/20/05 - A Wee Late
10/20/05 - Presence of Malice
10/20/05 - I Got Served
10/19/05 - My Little Friend
10/19/05 - Herman's Hermits
10/19/05 - Joining the Gym (7)
10/19/05 - Joining the Gym (6)
10/19/05 - Joining the Gym (5)
10/19/05 - Banquets
10/17/05 - Needle
10/17/05 - Practice
10/17/05 - Cost Benefit Analysis
10/17/05 - Outside In
10/16/05 - Nozzle
10/16/05 - Gun Control
10/16/05 - You Get What You Don't Pay For
10/16/05 - Cloud City (Alternate Take)
10/16/05 - Rookie
10/16/05 - Cloud City
10/16/05 - Two Alarm
10/15/05 - Joining the Gym (4)
10/15/05 - Oz
10/15/05 - Safety Duck
10/15/05 - Tonic
10/15/05 - Order 24 Hours In Advance
10/15/05 - Trick, Not Treat
10/14/05 - Hotel Perks
10/14/05 - Value
10/13/05 - Mrs. Clean
10/12/05 - The Dorms
10/12/05 - Joining the Gym (3)
10/11/05 - The Easy Way Out
10/11/05 - Forename
10/11/05 - Restraint
10/11/05 - Joining the Gym (2)
10/11/05 - Ab Blaster
10/11/05 - Why I Could Never Live in the Northeast
10/10/05 - Satisfactory
10/09/05 - Joining the Gym
10/08/05 - Selective Memory
10/07/05 - Delayed
10/06/05 - Hedge
10/06/05 - I Love Company
10/05/05 - Snow Job
10/05/05 - Corporate Extortion (8)
10/05/05 - Captain EEO
10/05/05 - Retreat
10/04/05 - Crisis Intervention
10/04/05 - Gotta Go
10/03/05 - The Perils of Dot Matrix
09/30/05 - Feast or Famine
09/29/05 - Binder
09/28/05 - Give An Inch
09/26/05 - Missed It By That Much
09/25/05 - Fun and Games
09/25/05 - The Last Word
09/25/05 - Thank You Again For Your Support
09/24/05 - What's In A Name
09/23/05 - Notes
09/20/05 - I Don't Handle Compliments Well
09/20/05 - Ways and Means
09/19/05 - Early Bloomer
09/19/05 - Meeting The New Neighbor
09/18/05 - Everything I Learned, I Already Know
09/18/05 - Infrequent Flyer
09/16/05 - Capital Idea
09/15/05 - True Tales of Job Interviews (13)
09/14/05 - Balloon Knot
09/14/05 - It's All About Me
09/14/05 - Rememberance
09/11/05 - Birthday Reflections
09/10/05 - Four Years Ago Today
09/09/05 - Crunch Time
09/09/05 - Diversions
09/08/05 - You Are What You Eat
09/08/05 - I Can Hear You Now
09/08/05 - Think Locally, Act Locally
09/08/05 - Some Child Left Behind
09/08/05 - Bloat
09/08/05 - Packaging
09/08/05 - Uncivil Service
09/08/05 - Blowing Out The Candles
09/07/05 - Fugu
09/06/05 - Hell or High Water
09/04/05 - Antediluvian
09/04/05 - Gonna Wash Dem Voters Right Outta My Hair
09/01/05 - Red Fish, Blue Fish
08/31/05 - Love to Hate
08/31/05 - Catwalk
08/30/05 - I'm Gonna Wash That State Right Outta My Hair
08/30/05 - Clouded
08/30/05 - True Tales of Job Interviews (12)
08/30/05 - I Can See All The Way To Mankato!
08/30/05 - Reassurance
08/29/05 - Waste of a Title
08/29/05 - True Tales of Job Interviews (11)
08/28/05 - Goodwill
08/26/05 - Resemblance
08/25/05 - Tow Jam
08/23/05 - Crowdpleaser
08/23/05 - Cringe
08/23/05 - Cryogenics
08/23/05 - Semper Fidelis
08/23/05 - Hungry Like The Wolf
08/23/05 - Dunlop
08/22/05 - Low Price Leader
08/22/05 - Meeting Expectations
08/19/05 - Profiles in Mediocrity
08/17/05 - Out of Site
08/15/05 - Field of Dreams
08/12/05 - We Blow
08/11/05 - Freaky Thursday
08/11/05 - If I'm Lucky, I'll Die In My Sleep
08/10/05 - Media Elite
08/09/05 - Totebag Toteboard
08/09/05 - Pests
08/04/05 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (4)
08/04/05 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (3)
08/04/05 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (2)
08/04/05 - I'm Getting A Certain Reputation (1)
08/03/05 - The Negotiator
08/03/05 - Stratagems
08/02/05 - Civics
08/01/05 - Visualization
07/29/05 - Sycophants
07/27/05 - Movement
07/27/05 - Depressing
07/24/05 - Roll-Back
07/23/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (12)
07/23/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (11)
07/23/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (10)
07/21/05 - Putting the Cart Before The Jackass
07/21/05 - Moooo
07/20/05 - Everything's Coming Up Roses
07/20/05 - I'm Back
07/20/05 - Local Cuisine
07/20/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (9)
07/16/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (8)
07/15/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (7)
07/11/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (6)
07/10/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (5)
07/10/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (4)
07/08/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (3)
07/08/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (2)
07/08/05 - How I Spent My Summer Vacation (1)
07/06/05 - I Didn't Exactly Pack Light This Time
07/04/05 - South of the Border
07/02/05 - Pan Asian Cuisine
07/01/05 - The Problem With High Fiber Diets
07/01/05 - Aspirations
07/01/05 - Bon Voyage!
07/01/05 - Where Credit is Due
06/29/05 - Thinning
06/27/05 - The Death of Little Miss Shocked-In-Advance
06/27/05 - Glowing Recommendation
06/27/05 - Conflict Resolution
06/27/05 - The Problem With Snobbery
06/25/05 - The First Multi-Media Presentation
06/25/05 - Doesn't Anyone Just Give Speeches Anymore?
06/24/05 - Business Travel
06/22/05 - Wine Spectator
06/22/05 - Seeing The Padres With My Padre
06/20/05 - Sometimes Believe What You Hear
06/18/05 - You Get Less Than You Pay For
06/18/05 - Re-tail
06/17/05 - Shallow Pool
06/14/05 - A Little Off The Top
06/14/05 - Shear Terror
06/13/05 - Hauling Ass
06/13/05 - The Darkness Before the Dark
06/09/05 - More Meeting Madness (Props to mmyers)
06/09/05 - Doing More With The Same
06/09/05 - Putting the Ick in Ichthyology
06/08/05 - Please Leave a Message
06/07/05 - The Ladder to Success
06/06/05 - Musically Incorrect
06/05/05 - Rags to Rags
06/05/05 - Finding My Inner Tube
06/03/05 - Gimme A Break Room
06/03/05 - Welcome to San Diego (Now Go Home)
06/03/05 - Step Into My Orifice
06/01/05 - Vocational Training
06/01/05 - No Means Huh?
05/31/05 - Ribbed For Her Pleasure
05/31/05 - Lies People Tell
05/31/05 - Earning Your Keep
05/29/05 - Asian Fear Factor
05/29/05 - Plan A
05/26/05 - The Tidy Bowl Man's Last Stand
05/25/05 - You Never Know
05/25/05 - My Way
05/23/05 - It Must Have Been Something You Said
05/22/05 - In Dependence
05/20/05 - Drone
05/17/05 - Obedience
05/17/05 - Fate
05/16/05 - Coming Soon, To A Playground Near You
05/16/05 - The Health Inspector
05/13/05 - The Slammer
05/09/05 - All Things Considered
05/09/05 - The Day After Mother's Day
05/09/05 - Dropping In On Human Resources
05/05/05 - Battle of Endora
05/05/05 - This Week's Uncle
05/04/05 - Automatic Drip
05/01/05 - Inevitableness
04/29/05 - Point of Diminishing Returns
04/27/05 - The Horizon
04/27/05 - What Color is Your Parachute?
04/27/05 - Sabbatical
04/25/05 - Royal Flush
04/22/05 - Public Relations
04/21/05 - Light At The Beginning Of The Tunnel
04/21/05 - Expectations
04/18/05 - Inside Goatse
04/18/05 - Flipping The Big Bird
04/18/05 - Free At Last
04/15/05 - Drinking Out Of The Box
04/14/05 - Working Around Kids
04/14/05 - Hooker Line and Sinker
04/13/05 - She Has No I.D.
04/12/05 - It Never Ends
04/12/05 - Shrinking Pains
04/12/05 - But I Just Got Back
04/12/05 - Always Answer The Question Asked
04/12/05 - Ask A Compound Question, Get A Simple Answer
04/12/05 - Sharing A Room In College
04/11/05 - Every City Has One
04/11/05 - Shorties Having Shorties
04/11/05 - Mind The Rocks In Your Head
04/11/05 - Welcome to Scarborough Country
04/10/05 - And His Mama Cries...
04/09/05 - Local Color
04/07/05 - City of the Vague
04/07/05 - What Happens On My Days Off
04/07/05 - Last Food
04/06/05 - Mrs. Sensitivity
04/04/05 - Business Attire
04/04/05 - Why They're Called Tarheels
04/04/05 - Code Yellow
04/03/05 - The Good Book
04/01/05 - If I Were A Cop
03/31/05 - Honey Bunny
03/31/05 - Self Fulfilling Prophesy
03/31/05 - And Joe Cocker
03/31/05 - Fleezing
03/31/05 - Temperature Scale
03/30/05 - The Curse of People Tell Me Things
03/30/05 - Some Of Us Grew Up
03/30/05 - That Would Be Telling
03/30/05 - God Willing
03/29/05 - How Temp Agencies Work
03/29/05 - More People Tell Me Things
03/29/05 - Some Mornings Are Slower Than Others
03/29/05 - Linguistics
03/29/05 - If You Haven't Read, Johnny Cochran Is Dead
03/29/05 - The Ol' Factory
03/25/05 - Some Days Are So-So
03/24/05 - Rumours
03/22/05 - Thick Around The Middle
03/21/05 - Eternal Optimist
03/21/05 - Melodramatic Theatre
03/20/05 - Thin Was In
03/20/05 - Vegetable Stew
03/19/05 - Boot Scootin'
03/19/05 - Me and My Damned Logic
03/17/05 - Compassion
03/17/05 - Pinch Me!
03/16/05 - Civil Service
03/14/05 - Guilt by Association
03/14/05 - Sgt. Shouty
03/13/05 - Reinforcements
03/12/05 - Tanks
03/10/05 - I'm No Longer Welcome In Orange County
03/09/05 - How I Handle Compliments
03/08/05 - Please Don't Eat The Brownies
03/07/05 - Thanks A Latte
03/06/05 - Saucy and Spicy
03/06/05 - Real Case Files
03/06/05 - My Alma Mater
03/06/05 - You're Invited to Spend $300
03/05/05 - Laying the Sod
03/05/05 - Dopey, Oh!
03/03/05 - 20/15
02/28/05 - Teste-mony
02/28/05 - Jackson Trial, Day One
02/28/05 - Young Tony Orlando
02/27/05 - It's The Thought That Counts
02/27/05 - Eat Your Words
02/26/05 - Horrorshow
02/26/05 - Seen and Unseen
02/24/05 - Maturation
02/23/05 - Leftovers
02/23/05 - Enough Rope
02/23/05 - Just Relax
02/22/05 - Loverboy Was Right
02/21/05 - The Lord's Supper
02/21/05 - He's Got Eyes In His Stars
02/21/05 - Die Now or Dilator
02/20/05 - Expression
02/20/05 - One Summer in North Carolina (5)
02/20/05 - One Summer in North Carolina (4)
02/20/05 - One Summer in North Carolina (3)
02/20/05 - One Summer in North Carolina (2)
02/20/05 - One Summer in North Carolina (1)
02/20/05 - Southern Charm
02/19/05 - Sometimes I Embarrass My Family
02/19/05 - The Coffee Situation (5)
02/19/05 - The Coffee Situation (4)
02/19/05 - The Coffee Situation (3)
02/19/05 - The Coffee Situation (2)
02/19/05 - The Coffee Situation
02/17/05 - Show Me The Money Shot
02/16/05 - How You Know It's A Fancy Restaurant
02/16/05 - We're Here To Help
02/14/05 - Happy Singles Awareness Day
02/13/05 - Apprentice: Martha Stewart
02/13/05 - Southern Hospitality
02/12/05 - The Parole Board
02/12/05 - Yesterday, At Lunch
02/12/05 - Southern Cuisine (5)
02/12/05 - Southern Cuisine (4)
02/12/05 - Southern Cuisine (3)
02/12/05 - Southern Cuisine (2)
02/12/05 - Southern Cuisine
02/10/05 - Laurels
02/10/05 - Then Again, Maybe I Won't
02/09/05 - Deuces Wild
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (6)
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (5)
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (4)
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (3)
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (2)
02/07/05 - I Always Get Behind These People (1)
02/07/05 - No Small Thanks
02/06/05 - Look Smart
02/05/05 - Qualities
02/04/05 - Grandeur
02/04/05 - Type C-A-T-C-H-2-2, Then Enter
02/01/05 - The Tithe That Binds (Alternate Ending)
02/01/05 - Melody
02/01/05 - Endorsement
02/01/05 - Real Advice from the Dept. of Homeland Security
01/31/05 - The Tithe That Binds
01/31/05 - Johnny Cockring
01/30/05 - There Go My Political Ambitions
01/30/05 - Setting An Example
01/29/05 - ADA Compliance
01/27/05 - Next Week on Discovery Channel
01/27/05 - Dirty Bomb
01/27/05 - Would You Like Flies With That?
01/27/05 - Sucker!
01/27/05 - I Make Special For You!
01/26/05 - The Life and Death of an Aquarium Fish
01/26/05 - Heaven Scent
01/26/05 - Getting Tanked
01/26/05 - Getting Around
01/26/05 - Regime Change
01/25/05 - Club Cards
01/25/05 - Petty Differences
01/24/05 - A Fond Farewell
01/24/05 - Heads on Poles
01/23/05 - Carnac Goes To Heaven
01/22/05 - Vindication
01/19/05 - False Advertising
01/18/05 - Confirmed: Management Really Talks Like This
01/18/05 - An Even Bigger Loser
01/16/05 - Reasoning with Ronnie
01/16/05 - Cat House
01/15/05 - Flipping the Bird
01/15/05 - Pouring Wine on Whine
01/15/05 - Where The Money Is
01/14/05 - Health Junky
01/10/05 - Breaking Up Is Easy To Do
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (5)
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (4)
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (4)
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (3)
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (2)
01/10/05 - Imperial H.R. (1)
01/09/05 - That's (Not) Hot
01/08/05 - Living Next to Sorority Girls
01/06/05 - Catching Up
01/05/05 - Cold Cuts
01/02/05 - A Little Prodding
12/30/04 - Overheard at Sea World
12/29/04 - Ethnocentrism
12/28/04 - Return to Sender
12/27/04 - Lost Luggage
12/26/04 - Size is Everything
12/24/04 - What It's Like Being The Youngest
12/24/04 - Ask A Stupid Question, Get An Honest Answer
12/22/04 - Repercussions
12/22/04 - My Cousin the Kindergarten Teacher
12/21/04 - Orca Winfrey
12/20/04 - In A Red State
12/20/04 - The Miracle of Christmas
12/19/04 - Two Women Who Hate Each Other At Work
12/19/04 - Two Men Who Hate Each Other At Work
12/17/04 - Shared Facilities
12/16/04 - How Soon They Forget
12/15/04 - Adam Smith's Invisible Hand
12/15/04 - Computer Love
12/15/04 - Putting the Ass in Harassment
12/15/04 - Everyday Low Esteem
12/14/04 - Vidi, Veni, Vici
12/14/04 - My Reality Television
12/14/04 - Me And Holiday Shopping
12/14/04 - Give and Take
12/14/04 - What Kind Of A Guru Are You?
12/13/04 - And He Keeps Them Pearly White
12/13/04 - Another Reason For The Season
12/13/04 - Dragon = Zero
12/13/04 - I'm All Heart
12/12/04 - The Reason for the Season
12/12/04 - Hello, I Must Be Going
12/12/04 - Academic Standards
12/11/04 - The Cost of Actually Living
12/09/04 - Pubic Service Announcement
12/07/04 - Over, Under, Sideways, Down
12/05/04 - Rupert's Next Move
12/03/04 - A Simple Solution
12/02/04 - Winter in San Diego
12/01/04 - Distance Learning
12/01/04 - California Living
11/30/04 - Trimming The Fat
11/28/04 - How I Told Jim I Quit
11/28/04 - Bad Bosses I Have Had: Jim
11/28/04 - How I Told Jack I Quit
11/28/04 - Bad Bosses I Have Had: Jack
11/28/04 - How I Told Kurt I Quit
11/28/04 - Bad Bosses I Have Had: Kurt
11/28/04 - Essence of Idiocy
11/28/04 - Going Both Ways
11/28/04 - What's Thought Got To Do With It?
11/28/04 - Interpretation
11/28/04 - Front Effects
11/27/04 - This Was When I Stopped Going To Church
11/27/04 - I Remember Mummy
11/25/04 - Tipping the Scales
11/25/04 - Skanksgiving
11/24/04 - Spelling Bee Or Not To Be
11/24/04 - Let's Talk About Complacency
11/22/04 - Here's One For The Ladies
11/21/04 - Gravity
11/21/04 - Secure Horizon
11/19/04 - If They Ever Tried To Fire Me
11/18/04 - Descriptors
11/18/04 - Know Your Enemy
11/16/04 - Features
11/15/04 - Littlegirl vs. Descolada
11/14/04 - Popiel Pocket Rocket
11/13/04 - Prime Minister Paul Martin's Nightmare
11/12/04 - Spankling's Nightmare
11/12/04 - Thinking Outside The Box
11/10/04 - My Wine Tasting Group
11/09/04 - How I Learned to Mistrust Commercials
11/09/04 - Give Me An "N," Give Me A "RON"
11/09/04 - You Better Be Good To Me
11/09/04 - Cushy Job
11/08/04 - Me-Ow!
11/08/04 - Thanks, Mom and Dad
11/05/04 - Swoosh
11/01/04 - TRICK!
11/01/04 - More Initiative
10/31/04 - Initiatives
10/31/04 - How About A Grand Slam?
10/29/04 - Cheery Cheer!
10/25/04 - Buy Now, Trade Later
10/24/04 - Damnit! He Showed Up!
10/23/04 - Why I Like Humboldt County, California
10/23/04 - Running Into Someone After Losing Weight
10/23/04 - One More Reason I Hate B&B's (The Backstory)
10/23/04 - Another Reason I Hate B&B's (All the Rules)
10/23/04 - Why I Hate Bed & Breakfasts
10/21/04 - Tie One On
10/20/04 - High Brow
10/20/04 - Do What You Love and You'll Never Work In Your Life
10/20/04 - Other Places They Should Card People
10/18/04 - If I Met John Cleese
10/17/04 - It Came From People Tell Me Things
10/17/04 - Scare Tactics Never Worked On Me
10/17/04 - Appreciation
10/16/04 - Growing Pains Reunion
10/13/04 - People Tell Me Things Strikes Again
10/13/04 - Revenge of People Tell Me Things
10/13/04 - Peeling Away
10/12/04 - Balancing the Scales
10/12/04 - Mentoring
10/11/04 - Little Reminders
10/09/04 - Hang Loose
10/07/04 - Hope, Growth, and Opportunity
10/06/04 - Please Rent Super Size Me
10/06/04 - What's In A Name?
10/05/04 - Putting the IT in Shit
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (7)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (6)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (5)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (4)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (3)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (2)
10/04/04 - Corporate Extortion (1)
10/03/04 - Simularities Repulse
10/03/04 - I Hate Circuitous Arguments
10/02/04 - Below the Fray
10/02/04 - My Beef With Midwesterners
10/02/04 - Reliving the Past
10/01/04 - It Isn't Divine
10/01/04 - Trekkies 2 Is Dangerous
09/29/04 - Modern Education
09/27/04 - Who Am I Wearing?
09/27/04 - How I Fight Off Madness
09/23/04 - Reinforcement
09/21/04 - The Bride of People Tell Me Things
09/21/04 - Migration
09/19/04 - Son of People Tell Me Things
09/19/04 - Putting the Stink in Distinctive
09/19/04 - Relocation
09/19/04 - Return of People Tell Me Things
09/19/04 - Bonfire of the Banality
09/16/04 - Small Picture
09/14/04 - Distinguished
09/14/04 - Layering
09/12/04 - People Tell Me Things
09/11/04 - What My Dad And I Argue Over Now
09/10/04 - Fine--Be That Way
09/08/04 - Last Saturday At The Aztec Game
09/08/04 - I Actually Love This Word
09/08/04 - Diets That Have Worked For Me
09/08/04 - A Dirty Shame
09/08/04 - I'm Your Puppet
09/08/04 - How To Lose A Sale
09/08/04 - Indentured Servitude
09/05/04 - Tailgating
09/04/04 - Watering Holes
09/01/04 - Gala
09/01/04 - Space Planning
09/01/04 - Selling Yourself
09/01/04 - Rethink Your Business Plan
08/30/04 - Why I Like Southwest Airlines
08/26/04 - For The Discriminating Gentleman
08/26/04 - Necessities
08/26/04 - Look Alikes?
08/24/04 - Kiss the Kook
08/24/04 - Where I Get It From (4)
08/24/04 - Where I Get It From (3)
08/24/04 - Where I Get It From (2)
08/24/04 - Where I Get It From (1)
08/22/04 - British Etiquette: Extraneous Apology: My Experience c. 1989
08/21/04 - Decibels
08/20/04 - Major Major Ass
08/18/04 - Reaching the Plateau
08/14/04 - Why Do They Keep Setting Me Up?
08/12/04 - Serenity Now
08/12/04 - Carrying Your Weight
08/11/04 - Mitigation of Damage
08/09/04 - He's On My Side
08/09/04 - Why You Can't Have My Secretary
08/07/04 - Routine Service
08/06/04 - Special Agent (3)
08/06/04 - Special Agent (2)
08/06/04 - The Trough
08/05/04 - Special Agent
08/04/04 - Nobody's A Critic
08/04/04 - Clarity
08/04/04 - Everything Can Be Explained With Business Cliches
08/04/04 - Enticements
08/03/04 - Another Secret of My Success
08/02/04 - Obstruction
08/02/04 - Get Out Of The Way
07/29/04 - Helping Hand
07/29/04 - Features
07/29/04 - Grazing
07/26/04 - Piece of the Pie
07/25/04 - Terminal Cancer
07/24/04 - The First (and Last) Time I'll Say This Word
07/22/04 - Hot Lunch
07/21/04 - Mr. Sensitivity
07/21/04 - Take Off Your Hirsute
07/21/04 - High Priority Messages
07/20/04 - O.B.-have!
07/20/04 - Remember The Seventies?
07/18/04 - But Is It Better?
07/17/04 - Putting the Mess in Messiah
07/17/04 - Eating Comida Loca
07/15/04 - Ripple Effect
07/15/04 - Stifling
07/14/04 - Olé
07/14/04 - I'm Tellin' Y'all, It's Sabotage!
07/14/04 - Alone in a Crowd
07/14/04 - Distraction Tactics
07/14/04 - Happy Camper
07/13/04 - You're It!
07/13/04 - The Only Good Thing About Working With Menopausal Women
07/12/04 - Options
07/12/04 - Wrong and Wrong
07/12/04 - Branding
07/12/04 - Recognition
07/10/04 - Special Orders Do Upset Us
07/10/04 - Butt Out
07/04/04 - Financial Independence Day
07/01/04 - Answer Shopping
06/30/04 - Mite-y Cheap
06/30/04 - Neat vs Freak
06/30/04 - My Dentist's Advice
06/30/04 - Get Pumped!
06/30/04 - A Brief History of Rock
06/30/04 - Comeuppance
06/30/04 - Bum Rap
06/29/04 - Welcome Back
06/28/04 - I'm Not Really This Big of a Bastard
06/28/04 - Employee Appreciation
06/27/04 - Something's Been Missing Lately
06/26/04 - Remember to Floss
06/26/04 - Use of Force
06/26/04 - From Smart Bombs to F-Bombs
06/26/04 - The 99 Cent Store
06/23/04 - Meanwhile, at Neverland...
06/23/04 - Lonely Planet
06/23/04 - Hard Sell
06/23/04 - Time Is On My Side
06/23/04 - We Are The Robots
06/22/04 - The Realist
06/22/04 - The Narcissist
06/22/04 - Wet Your Whistleblower
06/22/04 - Housekeeping
06/22/04 - Industrial Arts
06/21/04 - Insert Campaign Promise Here
06/20/04 - Born Against!
06/20/04 - Another Childhood Battle I Won
06/20/04 - Why I Love and Hate Infomercials
06/20/04 - Mentoring
06/19/04 - How I Suspect The Poor Folk Spend Their Weekends
06/17/04 - Downtrodden
06/17/04 - She's Back
06/17/04 - Member?
06/16/04 - Left Behind
06/16/04 - The Rapture
06/16/04 - I Never Get Tired Of This
06/16/04 - Dress for Success
06/15/04 - Brian Is Not The Saviour
06/15/04 - Today In My Office At 3:30
06/15/04 - Clothes Make The Man
06/15/04 - The Secret of My Success
06/15/04 - Chumming
06/15/04 - You Get What They Pay For
06/14/04 - You Get What You Pay For
06/14/04 - It's Still Rock & Roll To You
06/13/04 - The Next Countdown
06/12/04 - Not All of Us Got A Day of Mourning Yesterday
06/09/04 - Why I Like Working For The Government
06/08/04 - Southern California Livin'
06/08/04 - Afternoons With My Landlord
06/08/04 - May I Have Your Attention Please?
06/08/04 - Motives
06/07/04 - Look For The Union Label
06/06/04 - Why Home Decorating Shows Rarely Feature Bachelors
06/06/04 - Don't Tell
06/02/04 - Jamie Oliver
06/01/04 - The B.S. in B.S.A.
06/01/04 - Name Calling
05/31/04 - The End of Childhood Battles
05/31/04 - Childhood Battles I Won
05/31/04 - Childhood Battles I Lost (4)
05/31/04 - Childhood Battles I Lost (3)
05/31/04 - Childhood Battles I Lost (2)
05/31/04 - Childhood Battles I Lost (1)
05/30/04 - Menace of Doom
05/30/04 - Squeek
05/29/04 - When Midwesterners Visit San Diego
05/27/04 - Today At Party City
05/26/04 - The Icing
05/25/04 - Shock Treatment
05/25/04 - One Night, Outside P.B. Bar & Grill...
05/24/04 - Loss Leader
05/23/04 - Van Go
05/22/04 - Economies of Scale
05/22/04 - Shifting Gears
05/22/04 - Woodstocks Pizza--My Senior Year
05/21/04 - Rancho Santa Fe
05/21/04 - Comma Chameleon, or, Just Following Orders?
05/18/04 - You Ought To Be In Pictures
05/17/04 - Hooray for Bureaucracy!
05/17/04 - Keeping Busy
05/17/04 - Rub Me The Right Way
05/16/04 - What's In A Name?
05/16/04 - It's A Gas
05/16/04 - Cops Outtakes
05/15/04 - Voir Dire
05/15/04 - Elasticity of Demand
05/13/04 - Office of Pain
05/12/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (10)
05/12/04 - Customer Service Unmasked
05/11/04 - Rise To The Occasion
05/11/04 - When Nightmares Collide
05/11/04 - Acceptable Use Policies
05/10/04 - Bloodsport
05/10/04 - There's One In Every Office
05/09/04 - Complacency
05/08/04 - Relativity
05/06/04 - Being Interviewed by a Swede (2)
05/06/04 - Being Interviewed By A Swede (1)
05/06/04 - War Against Terror
05/06/04 - Another Reason I Hate Working With Men in Their Sixties
05/06/04 - Why I Hate Working With Men In Their Sixties
05/05/04 - The First Time I Experienced Karma
05/05/04 - Acquiescence
04/29/04 - Speed Dating--Pre 1865
04/29/04 - Speed Dating--The Twenties
04/29/04 - Speed Dating--The Thirties
04/29/04 - Speed Dating--The Forties
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Fifties
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Sixties
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Late Seventies
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Eighties (2)
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Eighties (1)
04/28/04 - Speed Dating--The Nineties
04/28/04 - Speed Dating
04/28/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (9)
04/26/04 - The Crystal Method
04/26/04 - Stirring the Pot
04/26/04 - Special Guest Star--Filing Clerk, VIP
04/25/04 - One Day, Back in the 70's...
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (8)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (7)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (6)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (5)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (4)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (3)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (2)
04/25/04 - True Tales of Job Interviews (1)
04/24/04 - Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before
04/24/04 - Mediocrity
04/21/04 - The Hallmark of a Great Boss (3)
04/21/04 - The Hallmark of a Great Boss (2)
04/21/04 - The Hallmark of a Great Boss
04/21/04 - Breakfast Nooks
04/20/04 - Stream of Subconscious
04/17/04 - The Importance of Keeping Eye Contact
04/16/04 - As Plain As The Face on Your Face
04/15/04 - Squirreled Away
04/13/04 - Dave's Stolen Car (4)
04/13/04 - Dave's Stolen Car (3)
04/13/04 - Dave's Stolen Car (2)
04/13/04 - Dave's Stolen Car (1)
04/12/04 - I'm A Night Person
04/10/04 - Killer Holiday
04/09/04 - My Gifts Are Kind
04/09/04 - Bad Spin
04/08/04 - If Only I Didn't Know Better...
04/07/04 - Stretching Your Mind
04/06/04 - Why I Like My Male Co-Workers
04/04/04 - True Story of an Ex-Librarian
04/04/04 - Squish
04/04/04 - Back-Up Plan
04/04/04 - Slip of the Tongue
03/31/04 - Snip Snip Snip
03/31/04 - Grandeur
03/31/04 - Chop From The Bottom
03/30/04 - Born To Be Mild
03/30/04 - Lesser American Folkloric Heroes (5)
03/29/04 - Lesser American Folkloric Heroes (4)
03/29/04 - Lesser American Folkloric Heroes (3)
03/29/04 - Lesser American Folkloric Heroes (2)
03/29/04 - Lesser American Folkloric Heroes
03/27/04 - Parallel Paths
03/27/04 - Climbing The Hill
03/27/04 - Back In The Saddle Again
03/27/04 - Damned Five-Letter Countries
03/27/04 - Back At You
03/26/04 - What Would Jesus Pirate?
03/25/04 - Anything You Post Can, And Will, Be Used Against You
03/23/04 - The Audience Is Listening
03/23/04 - Dress For Your Own Success
03/23/04 - Donuts, Anyone?
03/22/04 - Food Network's Unwrapped
03/22/04 - Oh, Jeez
03/22/04 - Projection
03/20/04 - Sit On It
03/20/04 - La Cerveza Mas Claro
03/19/04 - Intended Consequences
03/18/04 - Bar Jokes That Never Happened (4)
03/18/04 - Bar Jokes That Never Happened (3)
03/18/04 - Bar Jokes That Never Happened (2)
03/18/04 - Bar Jokes That Never Happened (1)
03/13/04 - Animal Husbandry (2)
03/13/04 - Animal Husbandry (1)
03/11/04 - I Think, Therefore You Are Not
03/11/04 - Ripening
03/11/04 - What's Next?
03/07/04 - Friends for Life
03/07/04 - Another Conversation with Grandma
03/07/04 - Pawns
03/07/04 - Zolofty Ambitions
03/01/04 - Plan A
02/26/04 - Something's Rotten (2)
02/26/04 - Something's Rotten
02/25/04 - Just Accept It
02/25/04 - The First Hollywood Ending
02/24/04 - Don't Explain it--Ban It!
02/24/04 - Not All Company Policies Are Stupid
02/23/04 - You Are What You Drink
02/22/04 - Too Little/Too Much
02/21/04 - If Michael Stipe Wrote Children's Books
02/17/04 - How I Avoid Talking to My Coworkers
02/16/04 - Grocery Workers Strike
02/15/04 - Homophonic Spree
02/14/04 - Back in 9th Grade
02/11/04 - Strike Three
02/10/04 - Outside the Office
02/10/04 - Thoughtcrime
02/09/04 - What Is My Life Worth?
02/09/04 - What Is Your Life Worth?
02/09/04 - Government Accounting
02/07/04 - Bad Excuse
02/07/04 - Inadequacies
02/07/04 - Measuring Up
02/06/04 - The Brown Party
02/06/04 - Acceleration
02/06/04 - Underwhelming
02/05/04 - At Your Service (6)
02/05/04 - At Your Service (5)
02/05/04 - At Your Service (4)
02/05/04 - At Your Service (3)
02/05/04 - At Your Service (2)
02/05/04 - At Your Service
02/02/04 - M.A.D. (Mutually Assured Dicking)
02/01/04 - Burn!
01/31/04 - Why I hate laundromats
01/29/04 - Bonfire of the Banalities
01/28/04 - Time to Kill
01/27/04 - Method Acting
01/27/04 - Will Act for Food
01/23/04 - I Am Not A Kiss-Ass
01/22/04 - Proceed With Caution
01/20/04 - Swap Til You Drop
01/18/04 - Remember to Take Lots of Pills, Too
01/17/04 - Charity Begins At Home
01/16/04 - Jacko Wacko Jacko
01/16/04 - Beware of Geeks Bearing Gifts
01/15/04 - Agressive-Agressive
01/15/04 - Nuh-Uh
01/13/04 - Widescreen Edition
01/13/04 - Something Smells Fishy
01/13/04 - What's The Difference?
01/11/04 - Wet Noodle
01/11/04 - Bachelor 'Hood
01/11/04 - Spew Forth
01/10/04 - Ups and Downs
01/10/04 - Swing Low
01/07/04 - Ape Shall Not Feel Ape
01/07/04 - It's Right In Front Of Your Face
01/07/04 - Hook, Line, and Sink Her
01/03/04 - Reach Out Just Short of Touching Someone
01/02/04 - Reach Out and Nag Someone
01/02/04 - Untidy Bowl Man
12/31/03 - Political Party Monster
12/25/03 - Reciprocity
12/23/03 - Morsels
12/23/03 - Table For One
12/22/03 - Motives
12/21/03 - Teetering on the Food Pyramid
12/20/03 - Haute Cuisine
12/18/03 - Expertise
12/17/03 - Bedside Manner
12/16/03 - Cold As Ice
12/16/03 - Passive Aggression
12/16/03 - Learning From Experience
12/16/03 - The Truth Hurts
12/15/03 - The Easy Way Out
12/15/03 - Gift Anxiety
12/14/03 - Christmas Cheer
12/11/03 - The Only Way To Download
12/11/03 - My Sister's Christmas List
12/06/03 - Little Fucker
12/06/03 - Phobias
12/05/03 - Peer Pressure
12/05/03 - Blue Light District
12/05/03 - Urban Squalor
12/02/03 - Holiday Treat
12/01/03 - Clockwatchers
11/29/03 - Are You Threatening Me?
11/27/03 - Thanksfornothing Day
11/25/03 - "The Lifestyle"
11/24/03 - My Fucking Neighbors
11/23/03 - Pussy Review
11/23/03 - At The Korean Market
11/23/03 - Conversation With Grandma
11/23/03 - Cost of Living
11/21/03 - Waitress In The Sky
11/21/03 - How Divine
11/20/03 - Devotion
11/19/03 - Circular Illogic
11/19/03 - Loss Prevention
11/19/03 - Misguided
11/19/03 - How Discrimination Complaints Work
11/19/03 - Buffet
11/16/03 - Sticklers
11/16/03 - Holy Frijoles!
11/13/03 - Temperments
11/13/03 - Bradsucks Physics
11/12/03 - Caveat Vendor
11/12/03 - Juggling Act
11/11/03 - Apples and Oranges
11/11/03 - Collective Bargaining
11/10/03 - Recognition At Last
11/10/03 - You'll Have Fun, Whether You Like It Or Not
11/09/03 - Marketing Men of Genius
11/09/03 - True Colors
11/09/03 - High Brow Sports
11/08/03 - Pretense
11/06/03 - Do You Validate?
11/05/03 - Oblivion
11/05/03 - When You Care Enough To Do Nothing
11/05/03 - Check It And See
11/04/03 - Dream Jobs
11/04/03 - Expect Another Recall
11/02/03 - Priorities
10/31/03 - A New Hope
10/31/03 - Johnny Come Lately?
10/31/03 - Slip of the Tongue
10/30/03 - Resuming Normal Operations
10/29/03 - The Local Music Critics
10/28/03 - Risk Factors
10/28/03 - You're Still Going to Burn
10/28/03 - Smoke Gets In Your Eyes
10/28/03 - Showcase Showdown
10/27/03 - Manipulating the Media
10/27/03 - Media Manipulation
10/26/03 - Conflagration Today
10/24/03 - Nice Beard
10/24/03 - Too Little, Too Late
10/23/03 - Demotivation
10/23/03 - Why I Can't Work In H.R. Anymore
10/23/03 - Crinkle Crinkle
10/21/03 - The Ol' Ball Game
10/21/03 - Overzealousness
10/21/03 - Inside Trading
10/20/03 - Denial
10/20/03 - Close-Ups
10/19/03 - Yammer
10/19/03 - Fit
10/17/03 - Bitch Bitch Bitch
10/16/03 - Ignorance is Bliss
10/15/03 - Reverse Music Engineering
10/15/03 - Fun On The Rocks
10/12/03 - Our Mother of Slang
10/12/03 - A View From The Top
10/12/03 - Don't Hike Hungover
10/12/03 - Shall I Sew Thee An AIDS Quilt?
10/09/03 - As Plain As The Chins On Your Face
10/08/03 - Codependence Day
10/08/03 - Late Return
10/03/03 - J'aime Aussi la Fée Verte
10/02/03 - Slumlord
10/01/03 - Para Mis Amigos Que Hablan Español
09/29/03 - Absinth Minded
09/29/03 - Absinth of Malice
09/29/03 - Conspicuous By His Absinth
09/29/03 - Absinth Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
09/25/03 - Fidelity
09/23/03 - Digicam
09/23/03 - Whipper Snappers
09/23/03 - Dying of Consumption
09/23/03 - Outside the Courthouse Yesterday
09/22/03 - Yellow Journalism
09/21/03 - Cunning Linguist
09/18/03 - Bypass
09/18/03 - Overheard at the World-Famous San Diego Zoo
09/16/03 - Comparative Religion
09/14/03 - Homesickness
09/14/03 - Penitence
09/13/03 - Office Gossip
09/12/03 - Yet Another Wacky Misunderstanding
09/11/03 - Axis of Egomania
09/11/03 - In Memorium
09/10/03 - Rainbow Coalition
09/08/03 - Pretty Pretty
09/06/03 - Who Wants Cake?
09/06/03 - Your Mileage May Vary
09/01/03 - Hygiene and Disease Prevention
08/28/03 - Rah Rah Rah
08/28/03 - Some People Don't Get It
08/27/03 - Tale of the Expected
08/25/03 - Repetitive Stress
08/25/03 - Get Well Soon!
08/24/03 - Honesty Is Still The Best Policy
08/24/03 - So Easy To Use, No Wonder Idiots Use It
08/21/03 - Bad Enough For Government Work
08/20/03 - Connection
08/20/03 - Next on Bravo...
08/20/03 - Out Of Office--Auto Reply
08/19/03 - Misinterpretation
08/19/03 - Commitment
08/18/03 - Why The Tech Guys Love Me
08/17/03 - Burger, Fries, Shake, Bypass
08/16/03 - Untitled
08/15/03 - Just Don't Order The Rusty Kuntz
08/13/03 - National Pride
08/13/03 - Emergency Planning
08/13/03 - The Gary Coleman Solution
08/12/03 - Nothing Gold Can Stay
08/10/03 - Meanwhile, At Neverland...
08/10/03 - Moderation
08/10/03 - Shopping Spree
08/10/03 - Genetics
08/09/03 - The Price of Inflation
08/08/03 - A Head Start
08/08/03 - Cleophatra
08/08/03 - The Waiting Game
08/08/03 - How Employment Lawsuits Work
08/05/03 - Lead-In Programming
08/05/03 - Networking
08/05/03 - Management Styles
08/05/03 - Costco, part 7
08/05/03 - Costco, part 6
08/05/03 - Costco, part 5
08/05/03 - Costco, part 4
08/05/03 - Costco, part 3
08/04/03 - Costco, part 2
08/04/03 - Costco, part 1
08/01/03 - Coup de Poop
08/01/03 - Why Salespeople Hate Me
07/30/03 - Better Than A Blue Period
07/29/03 - Death By Chocolate
07/29/03 - How Construction Defect Claims Work
07/28/03 - Proportion
07/27/03 - I'm Just Better Than You
07/27/03 - Celebrity Encounter
07/24/03 - Perks
07/23/03 - Shoot Your WAD
07/23/03 - Unrequited Spite
07/23/03 - I Like Your Beard
07/23/03 - Medical Breakthrough
07/23/03 - Home Improvement
07/23/03 - How About A Nice Sausage?
07/23/03 - Res Ipsa Loquitor
07/22/03 - Silence of the Hams
07/21/03 - You Don't Think, Therefore You Are Not
07/21/03 - Give Me An H!
07/20/03 - Salad Is Healthy
07/19/03 - DONG!
07/19/03 - Lend Me A Hand
07/19/03 - Eternal Optimist
07/17/03 - L'chaim!
07/16/03 - Urgent Message
07/16/03 - How Anti-Harassment Policies Work
07/16/03 - Be Careful What You Wish For
07/15/03 - Yawn
07/15/03 - The Criminal Element
07/15/03 - Baby Talk, Baby Talk!
07/14/03 - Giddy-Up!
07/14/03 - Meeting Of The Minds
07/13/03 - Home Schooling
07/13/03 - Isn't There A Law About That?
07/13/03 - Weird, But Not Funny Weird
07/12/03 - Matchmaker
07/12/03 - The RIAA's Next Move
07/10/03 - Size Matters
07/09/03 - Sexxxy 90's Song
07/09/03 - Shhhhhhhh
07/09/03 - Enough Already!
07/09/03 - Differences of Opinion
07/09/03 - The Grass Is Always Browner
07/08/03 - Finding The Right Escort
07/08/03 - Update Your Resumes!
07/06/03 - CC 195 Sanitation (12)
07/06/03 - Pink Eye
07/06/03 - Up Sell
07/05/03 - Fashion
07/05/03 - Agendas
07/05/03 - Career Advice
07/05/03 - Check Your Cavities
07/03/03 - Yet Another Real Sex Street Interview
07/03/03 - Technicalities
07/03/03 - Tit for Tat, Crack For Crack
07/03/03 - Father, Son, and Holy Crap
07/03/03 - Click Here for X-Rated Strip!
07/01/03 - Why The Atkins Diet Is Successful
07/01/03 - Public Service Announcement
07/01/03 - Eating with more hands than Ganesh
07/01/03 - Grapes
06/30/03 - Nice Rack
06/30/03 - Time Crunch
06/29/03 - Dressed to Kill
06/29/03 - My Cousin's Ex-Wife
06/29/03 - Family Reunion
06/28/03 - Texas, 2003...
06/27/03 - Texas, 1998...
06/27/03 - Self-Actualization
06/26/03 - Gargle
06/26/03 - E-Z Wider
06/26/03 - Barnyard Follies
06/25/03 - Idiot Hell
06/25/03 - That's Not Something I Do
06/25/03 - Roaring Rapids
06/25/03 - Ambition
06/22/03 - It's The Lack Of Thought That Counts
06/21/03 - Icing on the Ho Cake
06/21/03 - Another Brick in the Wall, Part IV
06/21/03 - Every Son's Nightmare
06/21/03 - Filth
06/20/03 - Smells Like Productivity
06/20/03 - We Can't Go On Together
06/20/03 - More Hits of the 80's
06/20/03 - You Don't Get It
06/19/03 - Este Noche, En San Diego...
06/18/03 - Turntablism
06/18/03 - Chomp!
06/17/03 - What I Really Want To Say
06/15/03 - Happy Father's Day
06/14/03 - Get Some Strange
06/14/03 - Grumble
06/12/03 - Denouement
06/12/03 - Asses to Asses
06/12/03 - Gasp!
06/12/03 - Public Enema #1
06/12/03 - The Will of the People
06/12/03 - You're Asking For It
06/12/03 - When You're on Death Row, You're Family
06/12/03 - Family Values
06/12/03 - Just Awful
06/09/03 - Hell Is For Children
06/09/03 - Nice cup, Stanley
06/08/03 - Banana Split
06/08/03 - Why America Hates Me
06/08/03 - Yours, Mine, and Ours
06/08/03 - Meat Is Murder!
06/07/03 - Cause and Effect
06/06/03 - Maybe A Bumper Sticker Would Show I Care
06/05/03 - Total Eclipse of the Porch
06/05/03 - Winky
06/05/03 - Very Important--Forward This Comic To Everyone You Know
06/05/03 - Shout It Out
06/04/03 - How About A Nice Tossed Salad?
06/03/03 - Shock & Awww
06/03/03 - Toro? Vaca? Mariposita!
06/03/03 - Oil of Ole!
06/03/03 - Something's Fishy
06/03/03 - I Shouldn't Admit This
06/02/03 - Cancel Us Before We Breed
06/02/03 - One Day, I Will Regain My Patience
06/01/03 - We Were Founded By Puritans, You Know
06/01/03 - Another Reason to Lose Weight
06/01/03 - A Reason To Lose Weight
06/01/03 - Boom Boom Scratch Boom
05/31/03 - Just Awful
05/31/03 - You People are So Dirty
05/31/03 - My Day at the Salvation Army
05/31/03 - What a Ho (Ho Ho)
05/31/03 - My Life As A John Hughes Movie
05/30/03 - That Explains Why The Cross Doesn't Work
05/30/03 - How's It Hanging?
05/30/03 - Hey! That's My Wife!
05/29/03 - Teats
05/29/03 - Just Desserts
05/28/03 - This Really Happens Here
05/28/03 - Stupid Cracker
05/28/03 - And Your Little Dog Toto, Too
05/28/03 - Kermit Sings
05/27/03 - Fool Me Twice
05/27/03 - Dirty, Dirty, Must Make Clean!
05/27/03 - Behind the Music
05/26/03 - Who Cares As Long As People Buy Them?
05/26/03 - Excuses, Excuses
05/26/03 - Hey, Oedipus!
05/25/03 - The Factor
05/25/03 - Now That's Hell
05/25/03 - Tomorrow's Sermon
05/24/03 - Karaoke Night
05/24/03 - Yet Another Man On The Street Interview
05/24/03 - Coming Up, On a Very Special Episode
05/24/03 - You're Hot Blooded, Check It And See
05/24/03 - Why Do I Keep Having This Conversation?
05/24/03 - Honey, Let's Rent This One!
05/23/03 - I Rebuke Thee
05/23/03 - Personal Hell
05/22/03 - Hot Dry Sex
05/22/03 - Take it in the Loophole
05/22/03 - Even More Man on the Street Interviews
05/22/03 - Coming to Theaters Everywhere, Every Summer
05/22/03 - Grass Roots
05/21/03 - Oh, What a Giveaway
05/21/03 - Don't Forget the Nashville Network
05/21/03 - Aunt Flo Gives It Two Thumbs Up
05/21/03 - What's That You're Sticking Up There?
05/21/03 - Face the Facts
05/21/03 - Proclivities
05/21/03 - Invalid Entry
05/20/03 - Real Sex Street Interviews, Take 2
05/20/03 - Who are you calling douchebag?
05/20/03 - Do Unto Others
05/19/03 - Now You're Killing Me
05/19/03 - Slow Death
05/18/03 - If God Existed, This Song Wouldn't
05/18/03 - Perspective
05/17/03 - Behind the Beef Curtain
05/17/03 - You Always Hurt The One You Love
05/17/03 - A Lesson to be Learned
05/17/03 - You're Busting My Chaste Balls
05/17/03 - The Negotiator
05/17/03 - The Devil is in the Details
05/17/03 - Hold the Pickle
05/17/03 - Take Your Licks
05/17/03 - Growing Old Is A Bitch
05/17/03 - Jesus Loves the Little Children
05/16/03 - What are you saying?
05/16/03 - Pee-Pee Dance
05/16/03 - You Are Welcome to My World
05/15/03 - We can learn a lot from the third world
05/15/03 - I Should Pay You in Bananas
05/14/03 - This strip brought to you by Proctor & Gamble
05/14/03 - Meanwhile, behind the barn
05/14/03 - You're not from around here, are you?
05/14/03 - Two years ago, in Hell...
05/14/03 - I'm not fat, I'm just big stomached
05/14/03 - Real Sex Street Interviews
05/13/03 - Later...After the Furry Convention...
05/13/03 - I'd better grease my zipper
05/13/03 - The PD are into BD
05/13/03 - Damn you! Damn you all to Hell!
05/13/03 - You want some of this?
05/13/03 - Wasabi?
05/12/03 - Service with a sneer
05/12/03 - More Man On The Street Interviews
05/11/03 - It's no fun if you're willing
05/11/03 - How Christian of You
05/11/03 - Switch Hitter
05/11/03 - Gentle as a lamb in the Bible
05/11/03 - Your whole life is a failure.
05/11/03 - Oh, Sweet Bliss
05/10/03 - How 'bout a nice game of Kerplunk?
05/10/03 - It's funny cuz its true
05/10/03 - You remind me of a less smooth Lando Calrissian
05/10/03 - Man On The Street Interviews
05/10/03 - Shut Up and Go Back to Work
05/10/03 - Magic Bullets
05/10/03 - Dr. Doolittleboys
05/10/03 - Snappy Answers
05/10/03 - Now It Can Be Told
05/10/03 - Skin Cancer
05/10/03 - The Perfect Crime
05/10/03 - Girl, you know it's true
05/09/03 - Won't Somebody Think of the Children?
05/09/03 - Aim Low, Shoot Low
05/09/03 - Ebb and Flo
05/09/03 - Oh, I didn't know
05/09/03 - Three were fantastic, one was just fabu
05/09/03 - Your parents would never lie to you, would they?
05/06/03 - I Love Eye-Talian Food
05/06/03 - The Ol' Switcheroo
05/06/03 - Who are you calling Mary?
05/06/03 - Win-Win Situation
05/06/03 - Utopia
05/06/03 - A Dictionary Will Clear That Right Up
05/06/03 - This is so unimportant
05/04/03 - I can write safe strips too (2 of 2)
05/04/03 - I can write safe strips too (1 of 2)
05/04/03 - Amen, Brother
05/04/03 - I love you too
05/04/03 - Damn Homophones
05/03/03 - We'll be right back after these messages
05/03/03 - Much Better Than Atlanta
05/03/03 - Catholic Grrrls!
05/01/03 - Two new jokes and an old one.
05/01/03 - I Just Wanna Thank My Lord Jesus Christ
05/01/03 - Black Like Me
05/01/03 - Who Says Jesus Wouldn't Drive a Hummer?
05/01/03 - Mr. Nice Guy
05/01/03 - A Load to Bear
05/01/03 - Isn't it Obvious?
05/01/03 - Didn't see that coming, did you?
05/01/03 - We Are Precious In His Sight
05/01/03 - Tough Love
05/01/03 - The Grass is Always Greener
04/30/03 - Yesterday's News
04/30/03 - Youre going to feel a little prick
04/30/03 - The meek shall inherit nothing
04/30/03 - Will this day ever end?
04/30/03 - How hung is god?
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featuring
diesel sweeties
jerkcity
exploding dog
goats
ko fight club
penny arcade
chopping block
also
Brad Sucks
