Dear Mr. Choadwarrior: We have received information that you willfully and repeatedly listened to "Days Go By" by Dirty Vegas in your Pontiac's compact disc player.
WHEREAS Mitsubishi Motors Corporation (hereafter referred to as "Mitsubishi") holds exclusive North American licensing rights to "Days Go By" for use marketing its vehicles, AND...
WHEREAS playing "Days Go By" at such volume so as to be heard by occupants of other vehicles and pedestrians constitutes a public performance, AND...
WHEREAS such performances in non-Mitsubishi automobiles irreparably harms Mitsubishi's public image and good will, NOW THEREFORE let it be known to all men...
You are hereby ordered to cease and desist further performances of "Days Go By." You are also ordered to pay royaties to Mitsubishi and Capitol Records plus interest for the foregoing acts.
In order to avoid the mutual umpleasentness of litigation, the RIAA will consider it "Fair Use" should you immediately sell your Pontiac and purchase a 2004 Mitsubishi Eclipse.
