Excuse me young man, but did you just take a shit in this washroom?
No.
I gotta say... I wanna believe you, but that lingering scent of shit leads me to believe that you're lying. I'm going to ask you again. Did you just take a shit in here.
No.
I want to believe you. I really do, but there's a scent in my nostrils that can only be described as the fresh shit of today's youth.
I wish that were the case, but the truth of the matter sir, is that I've been constipated for over a week. I truly wish I could fill your nostrils with my scent, but it just isn't happening today.
