It wasn't my proudest weekend. I've been reluctant to admit it in the past, but I think it's time I finally admit the truth. I have an alcohol problem.
Did you shit your pants again?
No! There are just large chunks of the weekend that I don't remember at all. I returned books to the library. I ate five chicken sausages. I grilled chicken sausages.
But did you shit yourself?
No! I'm just worried that I have a problem that I can't control like I thought I could. I'm scared.
I'm scared you're about to shit your pants right now.
