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| "But despite all that, my cell-mate and I still stay in touch" | |
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| "luckily she turned out to not be my sister after all. I could still use a drink, though | |
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| "and the doctor said that the stitches in my rectum can come out next week. Obviously we're not going back THERE to play D&D" | |
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| "That's when we discovered that the vomit didn't belong to either of us. She still won't return my phone calls. She was hot, too." | |
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| "Funny thing was, there were only two of them, so we never did figure out where that fifth leg came from" | |
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| "HELL YEAH I'm still pissed! I mean, Tommy might still be alive if that slut hadn't tried to get it on with the paramedic. I guess I shouldn't talk about his mom like that, but DAMN! | |
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