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by evil_d
4-04-05
Good evening. I'm Jack Danger, and with me is my co-anchor Anita Token. Tonight, Channel 3 News remembers the life of Pope John Paul II.
John Paul II was a remarkable man, a very genuine person, who enjoyed athletic hobbies and spoke as many as eleven languages -- ten of which he learned suddenly after his election as Pope.
In office, John Paul was a benevolent pontiff, who promoted peace and reconciliation between religions, and was even able to forgive his own would-be assassin.
That's right, Jack. I can't remember the last time the world has lost so holy a figure.
Anita can't remember because the passing of Calcutta healer Mother Teresa in 1997 was eclipsed in the popular consciousness by the death of British paparazzi darling Princess Di five days earlier.
Front-runners among cultural icons whose deaths could eclipse the Pope's are comedian Mitch Hedburg and political football Terri Schiavo. Join us after the break for an analysis of their chances.
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Pope Jokes

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