Hey Gabe. I've been elected by a committee consisting of all the girls you've ever had a crush on to read a consolidated statement about our feelings towards you.
I can't wait to hear this.
You're the nicest, sweetest guy we've ever met. You leave roses on our doorsteps at night. You're fun to be around, smart, everyone likes you. You're everything a girl could want in a guy.
Yes...
But we'd just like to be friends. We'd prefer to go bang some of those jocks or those guys that play the guitar. But we'll come talk to you about how bad our lives suck when they treat us like shit.
