Hi, I'm Sheriff Herb Friendly. 57% of all auto accidents are caused by drunk driving, 16% are caused by improper driving, and 69% of fatalities are caused from not wearing seatbelts.
Honestly, we've given up on trying to get you guys not to do those things, they're just too much fun. So instead, let's turn elsewhere. 3% of all traffic accidents are caused by balloons.
Please, don't drive with a balloon in the car, and if you must, please tie the balloon to the antenna. Balloons can choke and distract you with their wacky shapes and fun colors.
