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| ...I once got my fingernail stuck in a shredding machine and that really hurt..... | |
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| ...well, I once got my hair stuck in one and lost half of my scalp..... | |
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| ...but I got my arm stuck in a printing press and I had to get it sewn back on. I had over 75 stitches..... | |
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| ...and I got my head stuck under a bulldozer and had to have the guts put back in and my skull rebuilt. My head is 36.563% metal.... | |
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| Well, I had my insides ripped out from being caught in a tornado. Most of my guts are artificial and I can't have any more children.... | |
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| ...but, I was once a famous author in the 1800's, got lost in the north pole and was frozen for 97 years, and was discovered by Mobil Oil employees and thawed out and my dick doesn't work any more.... | |
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