quodlibet  

Give me one reason why I shouldn't torch you where you stand.

We trees are obviously of Germanic origin and have no association with Santa Claus, or St. Nicholas, or Kris Kringle.

You're associated with Christmas.

Santa Claus inhabits a domain above the tree line. Kid, I'm an innocent pagan custom unrelated to the phenomenon of Kris Kringle.

Here's another unrelated custom at Christmas: the burning of the Yuletide log.

Drat.