quodlibet  

Masturbation is the leading cause of blindness in young men.

Granddad jerks off to Playboy all the time and he's still got his vision.

The only decent position for coitus is the missionary position.

What happens if your lady's a bitch and wants to do it doggy-style?

Intercourse between men and men, and women and women, has been forbidden. It is unnatural and sinful.

So pedophilia is better?