travisweird  

Marry, fuck, or kill: parasaur, dilophosaurus, or brachiosaur?

Hmmm. Obviously fuck a parasaur, that's a no-brainer. Dilophosaurus spits, that's no good.

Oh Spielberg just made that up. Dilophosauruses make very good wives.

Is this an elaborate attempt to hook me up with your ugly friend?

Oh god.

Of course the waitress had to be a parasaur.