That's fucking funny, Dan. Might as well close the contest now. Anyone know why Nate hasn't entered this CC?

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I LIVE!

Well, he did say he was going to be having access problems...
Perhaps my contest jinxed his internet connection! Hope so.

A true fix in sixty-six by kaufman 9-25-01

In the beginning ... What shall I do for CC 66? How about something involving deals with evil.... It's not fair, evil_d. The contest is tilted toward evil folks. The honorable thing would be for you to sit it out. Shit, wirthling, if it means that much to you, I will. Wirthling's right, but he forgot about ALL the evil folk. Go get 'em, Dan Piece of cake.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Is this an entry?

CC:66 Cats are the Devil by tiger8191 9-25-01

My son. Join us in our quest for absolute power of the world! Dude, your cat just talked. What the fuck is up with that? I am the Lord Lucifers Administravive Assistant. Listen to Lucifer or you will spend eternity as a dwarf forever holding your package! What the hell you freak! Yeah right! Your cat is the Devil, and I am DexX! Buzz off! I told you not to fuck with the cat kid!

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"I know how toast works."

CC66: The average deity on the street... by DexX 9-25-01

On a city street... I am the Way, the Truth and the Light. No-one comes to the Lord except through me. Shhh! Quiet, Jesus! This guy's much more fun than you! ...so I said to the lead singer of Slayer, "Listen buddy, the music of Satan is the boy-band sound! How do you think Mark Mark ever got a record contract?" Ha! What did he say to that? Later... Hey! I thought we had a deal - you take the north side of the road, I take the south side. You stole my audience! Yes, you're right - we did agree on that. Now, let me think... why would I go back on our deal? Oh yes - I am the Prince of Fucking Lies! D'uh!

My apologies - that was crap. I'll do better next time.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Oh, and last time I checked, my Mum was driving a Toyota Camry, not a beast with seven heads and eleven horns, covered in blasphemous names. She may have done a trade-in, though. I'll check.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Is this an entry?

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Damnit guys, quit being so funny and I might win! ;)

Ok here's another attempt:

CC 66: Storytime With Jesus by attitudechicka 9-25-01

Okay kids, today's story is about my crucifixion. From John 19; Then Pilate took me and had me flogged. Hey, kid, if you pants Jesus, I'll give you a cookie. Fucking right!

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Mediocrity at its most average.

I didn't say she was driving it, just sitting on it. I can't think why she would be doing that...

Your mother drives a Toyota Camry? Fucking hell DexX you kept that quiet for long enough, didn't you.

Burn her!!!!!!!!

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I LIVE!

No. :(

I like my Mum.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC 66: This is soooo wrong... (ver 2.0) by Drexle 9-26-01

Hey, American Devil! Sucky sucky fi dolla! Me love you long time! Fuckin' Aye!

CC66 - huh huh, she said burning bush by lara7 9-26-01

I am the LORD thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. Give you twenty bucks. Twenty bucks? What for? The House of Bondage. I want in. I'm not really The Lord. That's okay. I don't really have twenty bucks.

You said "naughty" word, and not "obscene" word, so I went with "bondage". As a mitigating factor, I submit (huh-huh) the fact that I am from a Catholic area of the Deep South; therefore "bondage" is especially naughty.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

Maybe I'll rewrite that second entry to be rules compliant if I feel like it... damn bible quote...

CC66: Never buy a used car from this man. by apejuice 9-26-01

. . . and if you're looking for something a little more roomy, we have this '97 model here. Aircon, Leather, etc. Oooh it's nice. How much do you want for it? Think of this car as an investment. Like you said yourself, "For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also". It's nine and a half thousand. OK, I'll take it. Wow this is exciting! STEP OFF, FUCKO! That is police property and you are under arrest! Damn you again, Satan!

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I LIVE!

CC66 - Nip ma pal? by kramer_vs_kramer 9-26-01

Hey there sexy lady. Wanna fuck? Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. You know, I'd give anything to nail that sexy bitch. Anything, eh? I'll see what I can do... Will you shag my pal?

Comic Contest 66 - I am Jack's immortal soul by evil_d 9-26-01

Jack... listen to me, Jack! Do what I ask, and I'll set you up a Swiss bank account with more money than you've ever dreamed of! Don't, Jack. It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. I'll give you a vast mansion by the sea! A beautiful young wife for every day of the week! Don't even get me started. What are you trying to trick this guy into, anyway? I want him to fly a plane into Jerry Falwell's house. Well fuck... why didn't you say so in the first place? Jack! Those who do the Lord's work will earn life everlasting!

I figure this comes close enough for the first rule.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

Sorry, wirthling, I tried to keep evil_d out of this contest. Somehow it was clear he'd put up a work of art like that.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Evil Default Characters: Revised! by tiger8191 9-26-01

I'm evil! Uh uh, I'm evil! Bitch! Self-centered, arrogant, stupid, always has to be the default left character whore! You're evil! Told ya!

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"I know how toast works."

Evidently I'm too evil to keep the promise you made me make to wirthling in a comic I didn't know about until after it was posted.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

*beats himself over the head with a sign post*

Rules, I really need to read the rules!

Gah!

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"I know how toast works."

C66: Mixup at the Hospital by ObiJo 9-26-01

All of this is yours, my only son. All of creation. Even that titty bar down there? Dig it. Boy, I'll make you a deal. If you stop trying to forgive that gaggle of hookers every damn day, I might just keep this pitchfork out of your ass. Sorry, father. Sometimes I just have this irresistable urge to cleanse.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

lara, you can post your comics directly on the forum by entering [comic]comic number[/comic]

As proof of my evil, I shall try to shoehorn the desert-island music thread into this somehow.

CC66: Make a Joyful Noise nto the Lord by itsclark 9-26-01

Jesus. Being marooned on a desert island sucks. I'd sell my soul for some music to listen to. Cue new age piano music... You were saying? But it sounds like shit. Who is that? Yanni? Yeah... I don't have any use for his CD's since Mariah Carey's movie soundtrack came out.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"