Tiger, Woods by Namgubed 2-24-06

?   Tiger! Tiger! burning bright In the forests of the night, What immortal hand or eye Could frame thy fearful symmetry? It was that Kaddar guy, I guess ... shoot, man, get a life, already!

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Jabberwocky by LuckyGuess 2-24-06

Beware the Jabberwock my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Why are you still bothering me? Because I want to be friends. You mean that you want to validify being a cold-hearted floozie while at the same time having at least one friend since almost everybody else hates you. Oooooooh! Snicker-snack, biatch!

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

Gregor Samsa's Blind Date.

A bug-man, I can take. The putrid smell, I can stand. The viscous fluid draining from under his exoskeleton, tolerable. But this Phoebe Cates obsession... I'm gonna have to break it off. And of course her career reached its apex with "Gremlins 2". Don't get me wrong, I still consider "Drop Dead Fred" an American classic.

by ArtemisStrong, 2-26-06

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

CC 313 : Enkidu makes the call. by fzh 2-27-06

Viagra hotline, how can I help you? Yes, I'm calling about the whole "If your erection lasts longer than 4 hours seek medical help" thing. How long have you been erect, sir? About 6 days now. Say, I didn't actually take any viagra, do you think you can help me? SIX DAYS? Say, would you like to go out some time? Where can I meet you? Umm...sure. I'll be out in the forests near Uruk. Listen, I haven't shaven or bathed in a while, do you mind?

RCL no. 916 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 2-27-06

Everywhere I go... ...it's always the same... Big brother's watching!

CC 313: 1984 by HotRodDeathToll 2-27-06

I just finished reading 1984 I haven't read it yet what is it like? THERES SEX IN IT! So it's good?

CC 313=palindrome by HotRodDeathToll 2-27-06

Today in english we learnt about palindromes. And my favourite one is 'sex'

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The dictator of love and his weapon of mass destruction

RCL no. 917 by RandomComicLayoutGuy 2-28-06

Hey, Othello... Hi, Desdemona... Y'know... I thought it was getting a little too politically correct around here when the administration forced us teachers to say the "N-word" instead of nigger... But when they removed the letter "N" from our alphabet altogether to not be offensive, well they've gone too damn far! I just LOVE Desdemona's perky, little CRACKER tits!

ok, we're calling it early, because we have A WINNAR

biped rules the school and starts CC314

CC 313: Great Expectorations by biped 2-21-06

Break their hearts my pride and hope, break their hearts and have no mercy! Okay! Hi, Pip! Like 'em? GAAAAAAA!!! BONER!!! "Hi, Brad. You know how cute I always thought you were..." If palm the pogo-stick I must, then may each swift stroke yon fair maiden inspire!

congrats to Biped for not only bringing together the best parts of both Great Expectations and Fast Times at Ridgemont High, but also ... for enormous amounts of chutzpah.

2nd Place :

Big Frank with his Pheobe Cates-less entry...

CC 313: 1985 by BigFrank105 2-21-06

So how was the date with Cindy? Shit... Well, did you ever read the book "1984"? Yeah. And remember the scene where Winston and Julia are having sex and are caught by Big Brother? Yeah... Last night was just like that, except with a lot more broken bones and crying.

3rd place :

The Young Scot, for pure inventiveness regarding sexualizing "Lord Of The Rings"

YOU SHALL NOT PAAAAASSSSS! by The_young_scot 2-22-06

I'm gonna put my "precious" deep inside your "middle earth" and make the third age come Then I'm going to put my finger into your "ring" I really wish you'd quit Tolkien like that

Runners Up :

Unknown Eric, for starting things off with a bang

CC313: Beowulf and the Astonishing Vagina. by UnknownEric 2-21-06

Oh, dear. Grendel is even uglier than I thought. I'll have to distract him. Look, it's Phoebe Cates taking her top off. Where? Score. I don't see shit.

RCL for pure dillegence (among other things)

niteowl, simply for writing this gem

Here's a Quatrain, Call Someone Who Cares by niteowl 2-22-06

Michel de Nostradamus, 1503-1566 "The Queen slowly rises from the lake." "She tempts males across the Great Land; Disrobing, she causes nether regions to be aroused." "It's a good thing I'm locked away in my secret study right now."

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Our liability coverage is zero. Our balls however are enormous.

2nd place! Ain't too bad, I tip my hat to you, frere biped and finn!

Uh... 2nd place means FIRST LOSER! (Ha, ha) Of course, I could only wish to be first loser, being that I'm just a "runner-up bitch"...

Thank you very much, finn34. I would have checked this thread earlier, but I have been choking on a fish bone.

I will get a new CC up as soon as possible.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

AM i the only thick cunt, who doesnt get the winning comic?
please could someone explain it to me, so i can join in with the laughter!

thank god my looks make up for my dum arse brain

Well I didn't win, and I'm not too upset. Especially since the ones that did win were really good and deserved to take the crown. It's just for fun, so work at it and eventually you'll walk away with a CC.

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

...but could someone explain the winning comic to me please, im not trying to disrespect the winning comic, i just want to learn and laugh!!!!!!

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Think classy, you'll be classy.

aaaaah thanks,

ive never heard of ridgemont high. Must an American thing.

phew, now i can relax.

aaaaah thanks,

ive never heard of ridgemont high. Must an American thing.

phew, now i can relax.

Fast Times at Ridgemont High is basically the American high school experience, wrapped up in a 2 hour movie.

one scene in particular is hilarious, which is what the last panel revolves around.

Judge Reinhold, whose character is named Brad is alone in a bathroom, having a wank. In his fantasy, Phoebe Cates, who plays Brad's sister's hot friend, steps out of the pool, takes her top off and says, "Brad, you know how cute I always thought you were"... before he's interrupted mid-stroke by someone wanting to use the loo.

dig?

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Our liability coverage is zero. Our balls however are enormous.

i dig it

themoors by cockring9462 6-10-06

Emily Bronte, was she the one who went insane on the moors? The Moors? The moors! Rocky, mossy, flat land, gentle sloops of more moors everywoor! Moors make you maaad! Looks like a field to me MOORS! VIVA LA MOORS! ...

oops, didn't realize it was over.
You can just ban me now.