CC 91: The Abridged Adventures of Sinderella by kaufman 1-08-02

HOW DARE THOSE BITCHES MAKE ME CLEAN UP THEIR MESS! I'LL KILL THOSE CUNTS! My stepsisters get the pretty dresses. They get to go to the ball. If only I could as well ... No question, I am by far the most beautiful woman at the ball! Thank God my coach has turned back into a pumpkin. I think I'll just eat the whole thing. There's a slipper fitting at the castle? Naah, too much trouble to head over there. Hey Charming, you're realm isn't big enough. Let's capture France.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Who said anything about ANOTHeR NAME?
AVARICE is the deadly sin. As is SLOTH and PRIDE.
But you'll still be an ASS even if your also
being a KNOW-IT-ALL.

---

That's quite a display of pride, but it doesn't count for anything unless it goes in a strip. Here's an example of what I mean. I thought this one was hilarious, especially after your message gave me a context for appreciating it.

A strip for penisinfist... by DexX 10-10-01

Hello! I am wenisinfurs! You are all inferior to me! Bow before my massive intellect! Uh.... right. You are a wanker, and your "massive intellect" is nothing more than a pose with a thesaurus in one hand and your dick in the other. Uh... Just kidding! Gee, I really fooled you, didn't I! Your negative reaction really illustrates just how terribly inferior you are. Oops, did I say "wanker"? I meant "troll".

---
FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

CC91: SLOTH 5000 by crabby 1-08-02

CC 91: E|\|\/Y AND \/\/RATH by Haxx0r_K1ng 1-08-02

\/er1ly, 1 @m ruly k1ng 0f @77 H@xx0rz... bu here @re m@ny pretend0rz t0 he hrone. 1 @/\/\ 733 3R han th0u @rt! hese pe0nz @re je@l0uz 0f my 733 sk1llz @nd my leg10nz 0f @dm1r0rz. j00 @re n0t @ k1ng, j00 @re juft a f00! But hey @77 f0rget 0ne th1ng... H377 h@th n0 fury l1ke @ h@xx0r sk0rned. PH33R! @@@@RRRGH! 1'M 0N PHYRE!!!

CC 91: SL0TH by Haxx0r_K1ng 1-08-02

1 @m b0red. 1 kn0w wh@t 1'77 d0... 1'77 summ0n +he C0urt Jexxt0r! Jexxt0r, entert@1n meh. 1t iz h@rd t0 be entert@1n1ng when j00r c0m1x suxx0rs s0 much. 1'm 0utt@ here0rz. S1gh... 1ts n0t ez be1ng K1ng.

CC 91: GR33D by Haxx0r_K1ng 1-08-02

H@xx0r_K1ng 0wn0rz @77 +hat he surveyz0rz... j00 know wh@t +h@t me@nz... ALL J00R B@SE @RE BEL0NG T0 US!

CC 91: PR1DE AND GLUTT0NY by Haxx0r_K1ng 1-08-02

Jexxt0r, +h0u @rt t00 ph@t. 1 dem@nd +h@t j00 g0 0n @ d1et! But S1re, j00 @lre@dy h@ve me 0n @ d1et. 1 e@t n0th1ng but t@ble scr@ps every d@y. J00 m@ke me s1ck, Jexxt0r! 1 d0n't underst@nd... h0w d0es j00r /\/\@jesty k33p h1s g1rl1sh f1gure? J00r /\/\@jesty e@ts en0ugh f0r @n eleph@nt... \/\/1th sk177z @s 733+ @s m1ne, j00 c@n d0 @nyth1ng. M@ybe th1s w1ll help j00 burn j00r c@l0r1ez! ::PH\/\/00SH!!!::

PH33R!

---
Tempt th33 n0t my 733+ sk177z!!!

Is it wrong that I like the Haxx0r_K1ng?

---
Dad was flammable

C C 91: Spot the Class Geek by kaufman 1-09-02

Okay, class, who can explain to me one of the Seven Deadly Sins and why it's a sin? ... Chuck? Wrath is a sin because Khan had it, and he was a bad man.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Here are my six valid entries...

CC91: Anger by Default by DexX 1-09-02

Don't just sit there! Give us some fucking dialogue!

CC91: Pride by Default by DexX 1-09-02

I'm too good to appear in one of DexX's comics. Yeah, me too.

CC91: Envy by Default by DexX 1-09-02

Is she gone? Great, my trick worked. I hate having to share a panel with her all the time. She thinks she is so wonderful... Damn it! I'm back!

CC91: Greed by Default by DexX 1-09-02

Can't you just leave me alone for a while? I need some space! I want a whole comic strip to myself for a change! Fine, if you're going to be like that... Aaahhh, much better... Twelve seconds later... I'm bored.

CC91: Gluttony by Default by DexX 1-09-02

Bored, bored, bored... Oh, back again are you? Yup. Just wondering if you wanted a waffle. Sure! Oh... then I suppose I shouldn't have eaten them all, eh?

[Click to view comic: 'CC91: Sloth by Default']

...and I couldn't help adding one last one. it directly violates the rules, but I really wanted to complete the set. Please ignore this one when judging. :)

[Click to view comic: 'CC91: Lust by Default']

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Yes, it's very very wrong. You should be ashamed.

(*waits until everyone's back is turned*)

(*Giggles at "C0urt Jexxt0r"*)

I'm sitting this one out, but here are the Seven Deadly Motivational Posters for your amusement.

---
...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Mmmm... recycled comix (sloth)

Wrath:

The Apes of Wrath, take 2 by Namgubed 10-04-01

The Apes of Wrath Grrr... Rahrr... YOUR NAME HERE

Gluttony:

Cowboy Feces by Namgubed 12-10-01

So I says, "Them bowel movements ain't gonna void themselves!" Damn, Gus, what the fuck did you eat?

Envy & Greed:

The Persnickety Plums of Perilous Pauline by Namgubed 10-04-01

Primarily, Pauline pilfered the perilously persnickety plums plum off'n peddler and panhandler Poindexter's pernicious perambulator. Stop, thief! So long, sucker! She then proceded to peddle the pilfered plums for profit. However, Peter Piper, who packed a peck of pestilence-ridden pepperoni, provided the prosecution with pilfered plum & pepperoni pizza. Plums for sale, dammit! C'mon over! Wheretofore the poultry of paradise was purposefully plucked of psychedelic plumes portrayed with a particularly plentiful portion of pulchritude. Just hold still ... Ouch!

Pride:

CC 80: La Villa Strangiatto by Namgubed 11-15-01

Excuse me, ma'am, I was following this rabbit, you see, and I fell down a hole, and I asked for help, and nobody would, because everybody hates me... Silence! I am the Queen of Hearts, and you will address me as 'Your Majesty'! Now, what is your name, little girl? If it please your majesty, my name is Alison... Alison Wonderland. There is but one penalty for bad puns... Uh-oh... OFF WITH HER HEAD!!!

---
"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Envy Consumes Even the Truest Heart by Skabby_Firefly 1-09-02

Envy the sea captain for only he knows the true meaning of love. Truer words have never been spoken Mr. Easter Bunny. Fool! I paid my dues man I was in Nam.

---
eat pie, and curry too

PRIDE and GREED with a bit of SNIDE WANKING! by wenisinfurs 1-09-02

Hee! We really showed Her! My lame comic really slams all her comics! Go dude go! My referencing it only makes it MORE SUPERIOR! Well, it's because we have been masturbating using STRIPCREATOR longer than this weaslette! Hell if we'll ever let a girl in our circle jerk! Meanwhile... So he goes, like WHATEVER and I am so FOR SHURE! boys are cute... hee hee! I mean lame!

---
Is it wrong? I don't think so...

Theology and a Can of Whoop-Ass by israphael 1-09-02

Israphael, did I hear the rules right? We are supposed to write a strip on one of the seven deadly sins, except for lust? That's right, Lady J. Even though I studied in a seminary, I don't have a traditional concept of sin. I see sin as more of a failing of the personality than of the soul. People encounter a emptyness in themselves which they try to fill with more tangible things. But no matter how they fulfill their "want", the emptyness remains. This "want" then becomes so overpowering that it becomes a compulsion that leads you to become blind to the needs of others. So what do you think? Does personal emptyness and unfulfillable "want" make for a more meaningful model than the christian concept of sin? Look, I'm trying to write a funny strip here. I "want" you to shut the hell up before I'm compelled to kick your ass.

---
"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

I'm not sure whether this breaks the rules or not. But it's the only funny idea I've had in a while, so bite me.

CC 91: Envy by NeoVid 1-09-02

TOBOR WONDERS IF ANYONE REALIZES THAT HIS MOTIVATION IS JEALOUSY OVER NOT HAVING A GREAT ASS.

---
"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

lots of sin's but no lust by fuck 1-09-02

anger + glutony YOU BITCH IM GONIG TO RA-I MEEN CUDLE YOU!! cold you give me some pie's in sted pleese greed + envy no. ive cudled evry one in the world exept for 29 peepel i wish i could be 1 of the peepel you didnt cudle sloth +pride ok ill cudle you now!! no on 2nd thoght i cant be bothred why not!! thares nothin rong with me!!

---
sex

The Sin of Pride (or at Least of Heresy) by israphael 1-09-02

So you're, like, all-knowing and stuff. So can you name all seven of the deadly sins? That would be a simple task, my son. Let's see there is anger, and pride, and... oh yes, envy, and... um... Not so easy is it, stick-boy? Yes- I mean No- You're confusing me. The seven deadly sins are pride, anger, envy, greed, and... Did I mention envy yet? Just admit it, you don't know all seven of the deadly sins. Screw you, I know all the sins! There is anger, pride, greed, envy, and... and... grumpy, sneezy, and dopey!

---
"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

Gluttony for punishment

Suck it down! by Spankling 1-09-02

Don't you even want to know why your beer is so warm? Fuck that! At a party like this you can't expect the beer to stay cold. But it's nearly 98.6! Slow down and think! No time! Gotta keep pounding! I hear the keg is about out! Gotta put my buzz over the top before the supply runs out! Very well. Would you like me to go fill it again for you? You're the best!

Appoligizings to Desc!

---
"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Whenever I stumble into one of the grey areas of morality, I ask myself: What Would Space Moose Do?

---
"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

I can not get remote linking, so I am using a bogus photo page so you can access a strip that I tweaked.

http://yousahaquiel.freeservers.com/

---
"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

The Seven Deadly Virtues by kaufman 1-10-02

You've got to help me, Father. I am SO worried about my daughter and her spiritual development. You are wise, my child, to have come to me for guidance. Please unburden yourself and tell me your child's troubles. She's got a really low self image, is apathetic about everything, has no interest in her possessions or in boys, she's gone anorexic and OCD - she doesn't even sleep anymore! Relax, my child. Your daughter's salvation is guaranteed. Huh? It is? Absolutely. I've never seen a mortal stray so far from the Seven Deadly Sins!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

0f c0urse n0+. F0r j00r l0y@lty +0 +he cr0wn, 1 w0uld l1ke +0 0ffer +hee @ very 1mp0rtant p0s1t10n 1n my c0urt.

H0w d0es "/\/\1n1ster 0f Pr0n" s0und?

---
Tempt th33 n0t my 733+ sk177z!!!

0f c0urse n0+. F0r j00r l0y@lty +0 +he cr0wn, 1 w0uld l1ke +0 0ffer +hee @ very 1mp0rtant p0s1t10n 1n my c0urt.

H0w d0es "/\/\1n1ster 0f Pr0n" s0und?

---

Oooh, go for it Kajun. And send Brad a few quid, so you can have that in 1337speak under your name forevermore!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Pr1/\/\e /\/\1n1ster 0f Pr0n by Haxx0r_K1ng 1-10-02

K@jun_F1refly, +h0u h@st been summ0ned t0 my c0urt t0 rec1eve j00r t1tle. Wow, it's an honour your majesty. 1 hereby @pp01nt +hee w1th +he +1tle "Pr1me M1n1ster 0f Pr0n." Great! Does this mean I get to manage the Kingdom's internet Porn treasury? N0! 1t me@nz +hat +h0u must st@r 1n @ll 0f +he K1ngd0m's Pr0n! Summ0n +he C0urt T0B0R!!! ::gulp...::

---
Tempt th33 n0t my 733+ sk177z!!!

I know this is weak but it symbolizes a crucial fact:

We need a Sloth mascot!