[Click to view comic: 'What I wouldn't give for a time machine']

I was a musician and she had seen me on stage. That probably accounts for her interest. Why I was having a fit of conscience I don't know? I've just never been comfortable deflowering virgins.

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

And then there is the other side of the coin...
[Click to view comic: 'A bit of Mrs. Robinson']

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

This thread has evolved from "How did your folks introduce you to sex?" to describing just about any odd sexual experience, so I don't mind stretching that open a bit further. Here's an odd sexual relationship from my distant past.

[Click to view comic: 'Horse Girl']

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Could-a been a cop?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

Yeah, that was me. Sorry, man. But the look on your faces....Priceless!

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

And later that night when we got home, there was a hook hanging from the door handle! What's more, we both woke up in the trunk and it was filled with ice and each of us had a kidney missing!

And then we found our doberman choking in the house, and when we took him to the vet they found three human fingers in him.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

That's no way to carry a doberman.

I think this whole error message is DexX's doing. We were getting too close. Just too damn close to solving it.

Text comics don't seem as alluring, somehow:

{comic}
{title}Time for a neural net.{/title}
{panel1}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura4-1}{rightcharacter=clango1-2}{leftcharacter: Honey, have you seen the cat?}{rightcharacter: No.}{/panel1}
{panel2}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura3-1}{rightcharacter=clango1-2}{leftcharacter: I can tell when you're lying. Your LED's dilate. Now what'd you do with the cat this time?}{rightcharacter: I killed it.}{/panel2}
{panel3}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura5-1}{rightcharacter=clango2-2}{leftcharacter: In another mad attempt to prove Schrodinger's principle?!}{rightcharacter: No, I just hate cats.}{/panel3}
{/comic}

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Those were actually supposed to be divided up in two separate threads, one here and one the error message thread. I blame lack of sleep. And Paul Reiser.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

quote:

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{comic}
{title}Time for a neural net.{/title}
{panel1}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura4-1}{rightcharacter=clango1-2}{leftcharacter: Honey, have you seen the cat?}{rightcharacter: No.}{/panel1}
{panel2}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura3-1}{rightcharacter=clango1-2}{leftcharacter: I can tell when you're lying. Your LED's dilate. Now what'd you do with the cat this time?}{rightcharacter: I killed it.}{/panel2}
{panel3}{background3}{leftcharacter=Maura5-1}{rightcharacter=clango2-2}{leftcharacter: In another mad attempt to prove Schrodinger's principle?!}{rightcharacter: No, I just hate cats.}{/panel3}
{/comic}

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You know the funniest part of that strip? (Cuz it sure as hell ain't the punchline.) It's Maura's faces. I couldn't remember which was which, so I guessed. So it looks like she has some emotional disorder.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Close enough.

[ Posted comic does not exist ]

Love,

bunner

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

[Click to view comic: 'I owe a lot to the sluts in my life']

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet