Not that this entry will win but my mother always said "The best way not to win is not to enter" and I intend to prove that a scurrilous lie in itself.
Besides, naz_ghul's "Self-Referential Syntax" one was GENIUS and would get my immediate 1st place award, were I the judge :)
[Click to view comic: 'CC 166: Lord of the Lies']
For more information about the life of Jeffrey Archer, the man who coined the phrase "sleaze" in British Politics, go here:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/archer/article/0,2763,523208,00.html
Should tell you all you need to know about the lying sack of shit.
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Please replace the handset, and try again.