... post for the 100th time on this thread, completely breaking the overall rhythm; a rhythm that pulsates with the energy of a drug-frenzied orgy that makes you cry out in pure...

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

...boredom, "white bread on rye... delish" while sitting on...

... a bed of nails contemplating his navel, which is suppose to divorce the mind from body, thus rendering him impervious to pain, which is a crock, because anyone who has attended a high school level physics class knows that his body weight is so even distributed over the nails that an individual nail barely produces the slightest impression in the skin, in contrast to this...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...issue of Nintendo Power that I just got in the mail, featuring some of their latest releases, such as Animal Crossing and...

Animal Taxidermy,Animal Magic with Johnny Morris, Animal Nitrate, Animal Taxidermy and Mounting Made Easy, Virtual Welshman, Penguin Bukakke,...

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

...all for the amazing Atari 2600 emulator for Nintendo where you can re-live the blocky graphics of the past with exciting games where you move your little square closer to the other square and shoot little dots at the other square and it shoots at you and flashes and there is this screeching sound and your mother tells you to turn down the volume but you're at level 68 and you're going to beat the high score and it takes so much concentration and she walks in and stands in front of the TV saying "DID YOU HEAR WHAT I SAID??" totally blocking your view and you die just one point short of the high score and you look up at her with rage in your eyes, blood boiling, pulse pounding, sweating feverishly, trembling, and you say...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

"I faked every orgasm I ever had with you, bitch!", and then a hush falls over the room, and as your friends turn to look at you in abject horror, you realize...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

..that you are sitting in a sea of your wife's relatives, your in-laws gape jawed in disbelief as to what you just said, for all they knew from what they had heard the night before was...

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dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

...the inhumanly quickly squeaking bedsprings, suspicious buzzing noises, and cries of "Unh, yeah! Take the Power Back Batman!" that kept little Suzie awake until dawn, all this now exposed as a lie by one "casual" remark over dinner, from now on life would be...

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

...a lot easier if he unclamped the bear's jaws from his...

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Scratch and sniff porn isn't as good as I'd hoped

...conjoined twin, who...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

...is conjoined at the butt which makes it hard to...

...take a crap, since the crap just flows from one anus directly into the other, since they're conjoined, so what they have to do is...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...have a doctor separate them surgically (why haven't they thought of this before?) using the latest high-tech gadgets that medical science has to offer, including...

...a pizza cutter that was once owned by...

...Weird Al Yankovich, the delightfully silly singer who parodies other people's songs in a voice reminiscent of a nerd who was always picked on, beaten up, and stolen from in school-- oh wait, that's me-- and...

...has sweaty butt-sex threesoms with Carrot-Top and Gallagher and...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

... Mr. Rogers, but who's counting, after all, when the Mongol army marched ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

...sweaty and naked onto my lawn, and proceeded, before my very eyes, to engage in...

..........poetry readings, sweaty naked poetry readings, I then proceeded to stroke my long hard clamy............

...water hose and beat them about the heads and necks with it, which -- in retrospect -- was not the wisest thing to do to a hoard of burly, war-like men wearning nothing but swords sharp enough to cut through...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

......my long, hard, clamy............

..., imaginary...

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

........metal........

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eat pie, and curry too

...nipples which...

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