... erection of a memorial on the site of the Aggie Bonfire Collapse, in the hopes of raising the status of the victims to heros, which they are not, the building of bonfire is not filled with bravery or daring do, unlike the activities of the gallant men and women who lost their lives in the space program, instead they were just youths engaged in questionably risky behavior, what's next, handing out medals for teen who have sex without condoms, where is this nation's common sense and ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

... basic understanding that separating distinct sentences with commas instead of periods (or question marks) doesn't actually make them a single sentence, it just makes you look like a big...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

... arbitrarily...

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

...large piece of Gabe's famous cheesecake...

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Jesus saves, but everyone else in a 10 foot radius takes full damage from the fireball.

...which is famous because it killed off the whole town of...

...Frankfort, Kentucky, where millions of cows were slaughtered for their milk (before farmers realized that they could MILK the cows)...

...without having to use thumbtacks and chicken livers, which may be the most creative way to get milk from a cow, but is also among the least efficient, producing nowhere near the volume of milk that you can get by...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...rubbing slowly so that the glue is applied evenly, being careful not to get any on your hands, otherwise...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

... the hair will stick to your hands and when people see your palms they'll think ...

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

...you are the Wolfman and...

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

......people don't love you because you always want to change the defualt characters on your..............

..."The Best Yodelers in the World" fan tatoo, which you had permanently drawn onto your forehead after a night of drunken...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

debauchery-- hold on for a second, but I just have to say "IT'S SPELLED [u]DEFAULT[/u]!!! DEFAULT, DAMNIT!!!"-- following a Weird Al concert while eating--

...the Vanilla Wafers of spelling pedantry, which taste like...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...chicken (duh) with a hint of...

...garlic... come to think of it another thing they might think you are with hair on your hands is a jerk off because of the old wives tale of such things happening when you...

...glue hair to your hands and...

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I really am a fan.

...then glue tails to old wives, which they find...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

...oddly arousing, so you start thinking about "The Graduate" and...

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

start humming "Mrs. Robinson", and work your way through the full Simon and Garfunkel library, until you're brought up short by "parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme" because why the hell don't they pronounce the 'h', like it should be thyme, not time, and as your blood begins to boil, you ...

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Barry fucks cats

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and on his badge it says "wear a badge"

--try to continue the run-on sentence as best you can, despite a mysterious and unrelated outburst which can either be explained by a newbie's stupidity or his or her account being hacked by a "friend" trying to prove that...

...he is an ass raiding homo ner...

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

You Devin, you're alright.

But you urrr N-something - you should stop referring to yourself in the third person. It's not healthy.

"Neithers..bla bla"

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and on his badge it says "wear a badge"

... -d, a term which not only insults other ass-raiding homo nerds, but also brings copyright issues with Steven Spielbergs' Raiders of the Lost Ass a blockbuster movie which was the first time Harrison Ford had ever appeared on screen doing...

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002