Hello, Im new here!

Hails from Chicago!

How do I get my strips rated?

If you mean, "How do I get people to rate my talent/lack of?" Only donors can rate you. For further questions, I hope this helps.

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Mediocrity at its most average.

That helps! Thanks Lady!

I had to look up 'dry' in the dictionary.

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I am a Strange One/'His world is small.'/ 'I love hunting foxes - Ginger Bastards!'/ 'They weren't aiming at us, Not at my house' - Dead Prez/ The Pravda-Raï Party: Triumphing over Diversity

"arid" to be exact

I like them.

Kramer......Seriously! Your mack character is hilarious!

On Diets:

Born to Rawk 11 by jguitarj 10-03-03

Since I've been on the Atkin's Diet, I eat a strict diet of only chicken three times a day. In the course of the day, I equal eating a whole chicken. I do this 7 days a week..thats 7 whole chickens.. .....roughly 30 chickens a month, 365 chickens a year, 658 lbs of white meat and 619 lbs of dark meat, I have to incubate 30 cartons of eggs to produce that many chickens a year.... ....Geez I love Chicken... Clinical studies have proven that "obsession to math" is an unhealthy disorder induced by protein diets.......should be enough to deter you from doing it...... This message is brought to you by PETA

On Viagra:

Born to Rawk 10 by jguitarj 10-02-03

Yeah.....listen lady, I got a prescription of Viagra two nights ago but its effects have resulted in a deformation of my penis. My meat helmet has turned purple. Well, you have to read the prescription comments on the label on the bottle. There shouldnt be a problem if you only take one oraly before a lovemaking session. Did you say oraly?

On Telemarketing:

Born to Rawk 9 by jguitarj 10-02-03

Telemarketers will find a way!!!! Hello! Are you the head of household? I would like to talk to you about a revolutionary product called "The Segway." A motorized personal unit for people that are too lazy to walk more than 4 feet.. I thought I was registered on the "DO NOT CALL LIST" .....er.....we received your name from your internet provider when you did a keyword search for "YAK MILK," By law, since you requested info about our product.....we have permission to contact you.... What does the word "YAK MILK" have to do with the personal mobile unit Segway? well..........."Segway" is also nepalese for yak milk.........hello?.........can i interest you with our free duffle bag...

On Masturbation:

Born to Rawk 8 by jguitarj 9-30-03

Hello son...it seems to me that your mom and I have decided to have a chat with you on a specific topic. Its seems that your mom has caught you many times playing with yourself... Its nothing to be embarassed about...in fact its a natural biological function. Every male and some females need that to satisfy some primal urges...its that, excessively...it causes blindness. ......................Im over here dad!

On Dating:

Born to Rawk 4 by jguitarj 9-25-03

Hey! Thanks for going out to dinner with me! I spent about $120 for dinner, $60 for the drinks, $20 for valet parking, $30 for the movie, and $50 for a nightcap......can I go upstairs and get some? Not a chance bub! Aw...come on! I would have spent as much on an escort service! Even though! It doesn't guarantee you will get some! ....Oh....I got about $10 left for a lapdance

On TV Shows:

[Click to view comic: 'Born to Rawk 3']