It's a silly little thing that I thought you guys might have funny ideas for.

Mysteries of the Vague and Unknowable by mmyers 10-15-03

Hello. I'm Ken Martini and this is Mysteries of the Vague and Unknowable. Tonight we witness a young man's attempt to make dinner plans which leads him to the vague and unknowable. So where do you want to eat tonight? Oh, I'm up for anything. I like it all. How about Mexican? Or Italian? Ooh, not Mexican. It's too spicy. And I don't like Italian because it's too rich, but anything else is good. A man, a hunger, and a collection of vague answers. Two people find themselves in the drive-thru of the Vague and Unknowable.

Mysteries of the Vague and Unknowable by mmyers 10-15-03

Welcome back.Tonight, a woman attempts to get to know a man at a club better but soon realizes that he is Vague... and Unknowable. So what do you do for a living? Ah, this and that. I'm sort of a freelancer, you know, contract work mostly. I'm in computers. Are you married? Well, I'm sort of seeing someone, but it's not very serious. We're splitting up soon, not that we're really even together.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

This post is vague and unknowable... =D

Those are quite cute!

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I bet your mom has a loud bark.

Those strips demonstrate why I always check mmyers' new posts first.

The dinner thing especially peeves me. I have a few related strips on that matter. I go through it at least 3 times a week, and it never gets any more fun.

Thanks for the Vague and Unknowable comments. Here's two more. And choad, it's funny you say that because I always read your stuff first as well. And post your comics too. That goes for any of you fine folks.

Mysteries of the Vague...and Unknowable (movie) by mmyers 10-16-03

I am invading your planet with the intent to enslave your puny human bodies! Why we need slaves is a only a small plot hole. Do your worst, spaceman! I will fight you to the death! No surrender! Even as the world collapses around us, I will always love you even though we only met yesterday! Our love is what will keep us both alive and allow us to rebuild society! Let's have sex before I destroy the aliens! The plot? Vague. The reason? Unknowable. Yet, people will plink down $8 a pop and make this hackneyed movie #1 at the boxoffice. Why? It is Vague...and Unknowable.

Mysteries of the Vague...and Unknowable by mmyers 10-16-03

If I am elected your President, I will make sure that our large defiect will be dwindled, that our children come first, no more tolerance for crime... Better medical care, equal treatment for minorities, more jobs, and a better economy. How will I do it? Vote for me and find out! An honest man? Or perhaps candidate for the Presidency of the Vague...and Unknowable. I'm Ken Martini.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

This was the "going to dinner" strip I was thinking of:

Why Do I Keep Having This Conversation? by choadwarrior 5-24-03

Where do you wanna go eat? I don't care, anywhere you wanna go is fine with me. Yeah, but you have that crazy diet--98% of the restaurants in town are off limits to you. Hey, I'm starving, I'll find something to eat no matter where you choose. Hmmm, then how about Nicolosi's? Nah. What else do you have in mind?

Other Mysteries of the Vague and Unknowable...

Tale of the Expected by choadwarrior 8-27-03

You here for a smog test? Yes. You need to go in the office. This is a "smog test only" station... what else would I be here for? You here for a smog test?

Cause and Effect by choadwarrior 6-07-03

Overall, the your teeth look great, but I'm very concerned about your lack of flossing. Your gums are bleeding because you don't floss. I've gotta disagree with you there, doc. They weren't bleeding when I came in, so I'm pretty sure you poking them over and over with a sharp pick caused that.

You're not from around here, are you? by choadwarrior 5-14-03

Hello, sir, I am selling candy to help keep kids off the streets. I don't understand. Well, the money we earn goes to programs that provide activities for teens... And how do they keep kids off the streets? They take us off our streets and drop us off on yours to sell candy. Thats what I thought.

Your first Vague and Unknowable strip reminds me of my very first strip...

Here We Go Again by AccentuateNegative 9-13-03

Hey, we wanna take you out for your birthday. Anywhere you want, just name the place. You guys are great! How about the Prado at Balboa Park? I don't want to go there. Anywhere else. Just name the place.

Since I know SC regulars rarely read RMDC, where I posted it awhile ago, I'll just call it...

A Mystery of the Vague and Unknowable!

(Nice work, man, I really enjoy the series! Also, I fucked this one up, because I think people thought Jasmine is the name of the girl, and not a dim sum restaraunt I like.)

AccentuateNegative, I deem thee Vague..and Unknowable. I admit that I remember reading that comic and thinking that the girl's name was Jasmine. On the other hand, it caused me to go through and read your other stuff, and I really enjoyed it. Weeeeee!

choad, I somehow never read those comics that you posted so it was a treat, the prize in my cereal box.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

I am loving the MotV..aU, I actually feel like I am watching a show when I read 'em. I am dreading finding out that someone has done my strip before me. god knows I'm gonna jump on anyone I think has nicked my bit.

I was looking at that caption compo and I swear to God I was gonna put something like "hey there's a gun sellotaped to the back of your head" and when I read the other replies ( I think it was mmyers ) there was my thought already nicely presented by another member.
At least it wasn't someone shit who doppelganged me.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

Mysteries of the Vague...and Unknowable by mmyers 10-17-03

I see on your menu it says "Vegetable soup." Is that vegetarian friendly? Yup, it's a vegetable soup. It's made of vegetables. Yes, but what I'm asking is, is the broth made with beef stock? You know, is it vegetable broth or is it a meat stock? Um, sure, I guess. yeah, I'm pretty sure it is chicken stock, oop, I mean, vegetable stock. Look, can you just go into the kitchen and ask if it's meat stock or not? Sadly, even if he does walk into the kitchen, he probably won't even ask the cook, because that, my friend, wouldn't be Vague... and Unknowable. I'm Ken Martini.

smamurai, I've made strips that we're almost the exact same as other folks almost to the day. Great minds thinking alike and all that. Can't wait to see your new strips.

The above strip happens to my wife continually.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.