DEALER SQUIRREL - Everyone's friend in their time of need. Check out the first 3 episodes of Dealer Squirrel NOW!

Dealer Squirrel (1) by nexen 2-04-04

Hey dude Heres your O. That'll be 160 quid matey K. Can i give the money to you tomorrow? k cool The next day... I had your money dude but some black guy offered me sex for 160 quid, and I couldn't pass up the offer ur a dick

Dealer Squirrel (2) by nexen 2-04-04

Crack? Anybody want to buy crack? Hmm, im tempted to make a purchase from this squirrel, but if I do, then I won't have any money left over to buy candy Hey kid... Crack is whack, wanna buy a rock? It good shit, gets you high, gets you high Ok heres some money. My crackwhore instincts tell me to get crack rather than marsbar 34 pence? You wanna buy 34 pence of fucking crack? Are you a complete moron, kid? Wank, I shouldn't have spent 60 quid on those shrooms... Now I can't afford to buy crack off of this imaginary squirrel...

Dealer Squirrel (3) by nexen 2-04-04

Hmm what a retard I know what you're thinking, Squirrel, and NO! I don't want to buy any drugs! Um.. Nice Sign. Do you always follow that lame ass rule? Thats right, and as a result my soul remains pure. I don't need drugs to enjoy life! There are plenty of other ways - just look at my cool flower shirt. Um, ok, fuckwit. Do you want me to go away and not sell you any drugs? Be sure to check the sign before answering. Damn you, evil squirrel of drug distribution! May your soul rot in the everlasting fiery pits of hell! Oh and I'll take 17 ounces please.

Dealer Squirrel (4) by nexen 2-04-04

Meanwhile, somewhere in the depths of Dealer Squirrel's mind... Whoa I think this acid is kicking in... Hello. Would you like a tour of MS Word? Um, no thanks. Would you like to buy some drugs? Who the fucking hell tries to sell a paperclip drugs? Listen, junky - either buy my shit or I'll tell Mr Gates you've been shooting up on the job You win this time, Dealer Squirrel. But one day we paperclips will fight back against you manipulative drug-dealing squirrels!

Dealer Squirrel (5) by nexen 2-04-04

You Dealer Squirrel, pal? I'm not, no. Are you sure? You seem to be pretty well off for a crummy grey squirrel - with the jewelry & expensive cars and such, pal. I play the stock market. Ahh I see. You must be pretty good, huh, pal? Buying low, selling high, and all that? Yeah guess so. But I normally buy high, and sell when I'm even higher.