Read them...

I read them, and was amazed at how much more enjoyable it was than getting shot with a bazooka and then run over by a steamroller, or being buried alive with Gloria Allred.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

as long as it wasn't intended to be funny, i liked it. (except for the spanish one bc i couldn't read that one..)

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erin lenore

Not even kind of funny.

The last one, the one in spanish, though, might have been funny.

I thought 'Pizza' was pretty funny in an absurdist way. The other three are garbage. BUT, I like your username. I've always found priapism funny.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

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Not even kind of funny.

The last one, the one in spanish, though, might have been funny.

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The life of a robot by priapism 4-02-04

What a sad and lonely life it is to be a robot. I am built to serve man, but they give no thanks. I am unable to feel love. How I want to feel love.

The magnificent matador by priapism 4-02-04

I am the matador and you are the bull, which means that I am your boss. Your master. You shall obey me and only me. Now, go do my bidding.

Welcome to a store... by priapism 4-02-04

How may I help you? I would like to buy some presents for my loved ones. There's no such thing as love! Begone!

Chanty by priapism 4-02-04

Sing me a song about pumpkin carving. Alright. Ooooooohhh!!!!.... Two minutes later

Pizza by priapism 4-02-04

Hello, I would like to order a pizza. What would you like on it? Goat semen, please. Loads and loads of goat semen. Pardon me? What kind of establishment do you think I'm running here? ONE WITH A LACK OF GOAT SEMEN!!!! !!!!!!!!

titolo by priapism 4-02-04

Ciao, l'amico caro. Come siamo questa sera? Sono meraviglioso su un giorno cosí bello come questo. E lei? Sono anche meraviglioso. È cosí grande che siamo entrambi il tatto meraviglioso allo stesso tempo. Oh mio, sì. Convengo totalmente. Non ci è parte di me che pensa altrimenti. Lasciamo l'amore di marca, il vecchio compagno. Splendido.

Ashton Kutcher Teaches Imperialism 1 by priapism 4-02-04

After temporarily resolving the problems of Reconstruction and Industrialization, Americans began to resume the course of expansion. The horrors of the Civil War had interrupted the original Manifest Destiny that began in the 1840s. Now, as pioneers settled the last western frontiers, expansionists looked yet farther toward Asia. A leading expansionist, Captain Alfred T. Mahan, cautioned that the Pacific could "be entered and controlled only by a vigorous contest." As head of the Naval War College, Mahan believed that America's survival depended upon a strong navy. He argued that a strong navy would require island possessions to serve as naval bases. The time had come, Mahan wrote, for Americans to turn their "eyes outward, instead of inward only, to seek the welfare of the country." American ships had long been active in the Pacific. The New England whaling fleets scoured the ocean in search of their prey. The China trade had been enriching Yankee merchants since 1784.

Ashton Kutcher Teaches Imperialism 2 by priapism 4-02-04

Japan, however, had effectively closed its doors to outsiders, and it restricted foreign ships to a small part of Nagasaki. Commodore Matthew C. Perry, commander of the United States naval forces in the China seas, was a staunch expansionist Back in 1852 he warned President Fillmore that the British, who had already taken control of Hong Kong and Singapore, would soon control all trade in the area. Perry recommended that the United States take "active measures to secure a number of ports of refuge" in Japan. President Fillmore agreed with Perry. In 1853 he ordered the Commodore to open negotiations with the Emperor of Japan. The End.

I really like them. Plus you have an excellent name.

"The Magnificent Matador" had a pleasant quality to it that made me think of daffodils. "Welcome to a store" was insouciant, yet thought-provoking. "Pizza", however, I found disturbing, since it appeared that the boy was talking not on the phone, but to the phone.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

i prefer rabbit semen

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xx( o Y o. )xx

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Not even kind of funny.

The last one, the one in spanish, though, might have been funny.

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I don't understand. What Spanish one? There's nothing like that. Unless you're a complete moron and you're talking about the Italian one.

Moron.

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The pizza one was the only one that was funny. As for the others, I waited and waited for a punchline only to be rebuffed in the most confounding manner. Ashton Kucher reading from a school text-book was by and far the low-point of my week so far. I know it's only Monday but I have a feeling my week can only get better from here on in.

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GOVT. Warning: Do not smoke around children they will badger you for fags.

Listen, dumbass, if that is your real name. Not all comics need a punchline. It can still be funny without one. But you wouldn't know. I went through some of your comics and PU! They were god awful!
Ashton Kucher teaching Imperialism is very funny and you don't know true humour!

Reading is fun for your brain by priapism 4-06-04

What are you reading? A book about whales. Meanwhile! You're a wonderful dancer. Thank you very much.

Ho, Ho, Ho! by priapism 4-06-04

I LIKE SOUP! ME AS WELL! GIVE ME A HAND JOB!

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Listen, dumbass, if that is your real name. Not all comics need a punchline. It can still be funny without one. But you wouldn't know. I went through some of your comics and PU! They were god awful!
Ashton Kucher teaching Imperialism is very funny and you don't know true humour!

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"Reading is good for your brain" had a good twist ending. "Ho ho ho" was pleasantly blatant.

As for punchlines, the only time I use them is when I am actually able to think of them.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

"Life of a Robot" was good. Everything else was kind of...bland.

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Those comics were all awesome. The best one was Ho ho ho. In fact, your humor style reminds me a lot of mine. Let's be a team of misunderstood comic heroes!

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Legalize Love!

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Listen, dumbass, if that is your real name. Not all comics need a punchline. It can still be funny without one. But you wouldn't know. I went through some of your comics and PU! They were god awful!
Ashton Kucher teaching Imperialism is very funny and you don't know true humour!

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Untitled by priapism 4-15-04

ooh aah ooh aah ooh aah

Are they singing "Big Love" by Fleetwood Mac?

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.