Stripcreator » Read My Damn Comics » Frankenbeans

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biped stripcreator donor
Mr. Wonderful

I'm not too sure about this one, so if you don't like it, just pretend it never happened.

Frankenbeans -- 1 by biped
6-03-04

I have stitched together a body from the corpses of the dead, and tonight I shall instill it with LIFE!

What you're doing is HORRIBLE, Doctor Frankenbeans! It's MONSTROUS -- BLASHPHEMOUS -- INHUMAN!

Why, thank you, Fritz!

ATOMIC BATTERIES TO POWER! TURBINES TO SPEED!

That's from "Batman", Fritz.

No, it isn't.

Frankenbeans -- 2 by biped
6-03-04

O, MIGHTY POWER OF NATURE'S WRATH! UNLEASH YOUR BLAZING-HOT FURY! LET YOUR LIFE-GIVING RAYS RIP THIS DEAD THING FROM THE CLUTCHES OF DEATH!

Ehh -- not one of your better speeches, Doctor Frankenbeans.

Well, I was up all night trying to think of something dramatic, but this darned writer's block --

LIGHTNING HAS STRUCK! THE FIERY TONGUE OF THE THUNDERBOLT HAS SPOKEN! AND PRONOUNCED THE BURSTING FORTH OF A NEW LIFE TO TAKE ITS RIGHTFUL PLACE AMIDST THE WRITHING THRONGS OF HUMANITY!

Are you trying to out-do me, Fritz?

No, I like to think of myself as your "color commentator."

Frankenbeans -- 3 by biped
6-03-04

AND NOW -- ARISE, MY GLORIOUS CREATION! ARISE, AND BEGIN YOUR NEW LIFE AS A --

Er...got any kibble?

-- AS A DOG? WHAT THE FUCK!

So, like -- where am I supposed to "go" around here?

FRITZ! WHERE'S THE GLORIOUS BODY I CONSTRUCTED OUT OF HUMAN CORPSES?

Oh...that. Well, I sorta lost it.

Frankenbeans -- 4 by biped
6-03-04

You lost it...?

Well, I was playing with it, and it rolled under the bed. And it went all the way back against the wall, so I couldn't reach it.

Please...continue.

So, I used your notes to create a brand new body, only I used dogs instead of people. Um..."ta-daaah."

And THIS -- is what I am going to be proudly presenting to the scientific community? My glorious creation -- a DOG?

Well, a LIVING DEAD dog -- don't forget to mention that in your big speech.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

6-03-04 8:11pm (new)

quote : comics : pm : info

biped stripcreator donor
Mr. Wonderful

Member Rated:
100 votes

Frankenbeans -- 5 by biped
6-03-04

Well, where is my glorious creation now?

Oh, he had to go potty, so I let him out.

YOU LET HIM OUT? YOU FOOL! THERE'S NO TELLING WHAT HAVOC HE MAY WREAK ON THE UNSUSPECTING COUNTRYSIDE!

Oh, yeah. I forgot he was a monster. Well...monster dog.

GO FIND HIM! LURE HIM BACK SOMEHOW! I DON'T CARE WHAT IT TAKES -- TURN HEAVEN AND EARTH INSIDE-OUT IF YOU MUST!

So, then -- you won't mind if I use those pork chops you were saving for when your mom comes to dinner on Sunday?

Frankenbeans -- 6 by biped
6-03-04

Here, doggy.....here, monster doggy.....yummy pork chops..... yummy monster pork chops.....

Thanks, but I'm not hungry. I just went back to the lab and ate Dr. Frankenbeans.

Oh. Well, he was probably gonna fire me anyway. Uh...you're not gonna eat me too, are you?

No, I like you. Would you be my friend?

Sure! I've never had a friend -- and now, I have a man-eating, living dead monster dog as a friend.

And I have a crazed, hunchbacked dwarf as a friend. Fate sure has been kind to us today.

Frankenbeans -- 7 by biped
6-03-04

Hey, I just had an idea -- I can use the doctor's notes to make a living dead monster dog wife for you.

Wow! And then we can make a crazed, hunchbacked dwarf wife for you!

Honey, I'm home.

Hello, dear. Hope you're hungry -- we're having the Wilsons for dinner tonight.

Uh...couldn't you put on a dress or something? Or at least shave?

Oh, you insensitive beast! You didn't even notice my new black lace undies and fuck-me heels!