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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

Fans of basketball's Detroit Pistons cemented their reputation as The Worst Fans in America Friday. Their team down 15 points in the final 46 seconds of the game, they rallied their hometown spirit by pelting the visiting Indiana Pacers with beer and other concession-stand comestibles. All hell broke loose. At least two Pacers jumped the barricades and carried the fight into the stands, while fans likewise took to the floor to trade punches with marquee players. Officials were helpless, security was overwhelmed, and those players who chose not to mix it up simply stood frozen with their mouths agape. It was all staff could do to get the players down the tunnel while beer and ice poured down from above.

Anyone who had access to a microphone declared they'd never seen anything like it. Yes, we know all about soccer riots, but there's no such thing as a basketball riot. It's not the basketball way.

The sad part is that Indiana will wind up suffering most, its team decimated by sanctions for its part in the riot.

Detroit has ballyhooed its bad-boy reputation since its championship days in the late '80s. I didn't like it. Nobody liked it. We loved to hate those Pistons. But last season, as Detroit nearly swept my formerly-beloved Lakers on the way to the Championship, I found myself actually rooting for them. I wondered where the hate had gone.

Ah! Here it is.

I hope you rot in the Eastern Conference basement for another 15 years, you Rust Belt punks.

---
What others say about boorite!

11-22-04 8:19am (new)
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choadwarrior
Crash Magnet

Member Rated:

Farmington Hills/14-Mile represent!

The suburbs of Detroit are quite lovely (and about as dangerous as a bar mitzvah).

I left in '86, so I only had the '84 Tigers to rally behind. I don't recall any burned cars or anything like that when they won. The Pistons and Red Wings absolutely sucked back then. The Lions still do.

11-22-04 8:47am (new)
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jes_lawson
I don't know what I'm doing either

Member Rated:

Soccer riots usually involve sections of "fans" from rival clubs meeting for fights inside and outside the grounds. Coins and missiles get thrown all the time and the police don't do squat, however if individuals can be singled out for throwing racist abuse they usually get ejected. Ironic, really.

Recently England's black footballers were subjected to a lot of racist abuse by large sections of Spanish fans during a recent friendly. The consensus is that the England team should have walked off en masse, or not come back out after half time. I can't imagine what would happen at an NBA game, or any other US sport for that matter, if large scale racist abuse took place.

Finally, only once in recent memory has a soccer player attacked a "supporter"

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

11-22-04 8:56am (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:

11-22-04 10:46am (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

quote:

Finally, only once in recent memory has a soccer player attacked a "supporter"


Wow! Jes, what are your thoughts on this kick as a soccer fan and as a martial artist?

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

11-22-04 12:28pm (new)
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Zaster
Wait for it...

Member Rated:

Now if only we could see a few baseball and football riots once in a while. The bastards get paid enough, they should damn well take a few blows to the head for my passing amusement.

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I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

11-22-04 12:53pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

quote:



"How do those cleats feel, eh? I'll bet they hurt, smacking into your jaw like that."

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What others say about boorite!

11-22-04 1:13pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

While we're on the subject, when you are under attack from a professional athlete, you might ask yourself a few questions before deciding to stand your ground. Like, am I a professional athlete? Do I spend hours each day honing my reflexes to near-superhuman levels? Do I have the strength of two or three ordinary fellows? If the answer to any of these questions is "no," you might consider cowering behind something solid, like another professional athlete or a goalpost.

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What others say about boorite!

11-22-04 1:18pm (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

Plus the fact that the athletes are already warmed up. They've been playing for nearly an hour and have time to stretch out and get limbered up, while the fans have just been sitting on their duffs, sloughing down hotdogs. It's not a fair fight. I could go a few rounds with Bernard Hopkins if I had proper time to warm up, but not if all I've been doing for the last hour is yelling insults.

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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

11-22-04 1:31pm (new)
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Zaster
Wait for it...

Member Rated:

It occurs to me that releasing lions into the arena would be an excellent way to spice up a low-scoring game.

---
I was gonna send a robot back in time, but I got high.

11-22-04 1:44pm (new)
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boorite
crazy knife lady

Member Rated:

Or: Any shot that goes in off an opponent's groin is worth 10 points.

---
What others say about boorite!

11-22-04 2:08pm (new)
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PhreakyChinchilla
DANGER WILL ROBINSON!

Member Rated:

Basketball should go the way of the NHL.

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dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

11-22-04 2:13pm (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:


Please don't say those three letters in my presence, lest I go on a crying jag, and mutter obscenities under my breath aimed at Gary Bettman and Bob Goodenow.

I miss my NHL. Goddamn motherfucking Bettman cocksucking shitfaced Goodenow... *sob*

Look what you made me do! ;)

---
I has a flavor!

11-22-04 2:44pm (new)
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jes_lawson
I don't know what I'm doing either

Member Rated:

quote:
quote:

Finally, only once in recent memory has a soccer player attacked a "supporter"

Wow! Jes, what are your thoughts on this kick as a soccer fan and as a martial artist?


Disappointing, on both counts. Cantona should have given the guy a flawless Gallic shrug, then walked away, safe in the knowledge that he was superior to that arse on so many levels, including the ability to give him a humiliating, if technically suspect, flying kick to the face (The footage after that shows him falling on his arse, then getting up to hit the "fan", then hundreds of police and stewards intervening)

Or he should have gone for the full body slam and elbow drop from the top of the director's box.

My next comment is, given that hockey players wear something akin to straight razors on their feet, why do we see so much punching to the face and so little kicking? It's not like any of them have teeth or brains to injure up there.

---
Please replace the handset, and try again.

11-22-04 3:45pm (new)
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bunnerabb
Some bloke.

Member Rated:

I could start to sell tickets to enter a 70,000 cap stadium with a Glock and 500 rounds of hollow points at noon, and retire by midnight. A few dozen pressure washers and a convoy of semi's with body bags, later... I'm a rich man and Darwin just got the biggest leg up since fish started to breathe air.

Sports, like all other "civilised" forms of competition, is degenerating into another seething, barely-clinging-to-the-thin-veneer-of-civility wankfest full of beer addled shitbags - who want the whole thing to erupt into killing motherfuckers with sticks just as badly as NASCAR fans want to see some racer boy do a Brody into the wall at 240 MPH.

The sad thing is... a lot of people think that's "bitchin!".

Until.. you know.. they get THEIR asses kicked. Then they sue.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

11-22-04 4:22pm (new)
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MikeyG
Shoots the shit and often misses

Member Rated:

Sports are gay.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

11-23-04 8:19am (new)
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mmyers
Passing through.

Member Rated:

That's what I figured. There was nowhere to go but down from there, and the ass looked like the landingpad.

People feel free to do anything at a sporting event. Social etiquette is out the window. I was at wrestling one time and everyone started chanting 'show your tits' and eventually someone did. Would this acceptable anywhere else? Hells no. But no one thought anything of it. I was embarassed once I got my shirt back on.

---
Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.

11-23-04 9:50am (new)
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UnknownEric
and the Goblet of Mountain Dew.

Member Rated:


Ha!

Back in my "rock band" days, at a gig in a seedy club, some drunkards kept shouting for our (female) lead singer to show her tits. So the guitar player and I took our shirts off. It shut them up for a while.

---
I has a flavor!

11-23-04 9:57am (new)
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PhreakyChinchilla
DANGER WILL ROBINSON!

Member Rated:

Spoken like a true used-to-be-the-last-one-picked-for-sports kid.

---
dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

11-23-04 10:24am (new)
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MikeyG
Shoots the shit and often misses

Member Rated:

I was always picked first for "Dogpile on the Weakling", Phreaky. So that blows YOUR whole theory out of the water!

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

11-23-04 10:37am (new)
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PhreakyChinchilla
DANGER WILL ROBINSON!

Member Rated:

quote:

I was always picked first for "Dogpile on the Weakling", Phreaky. So that blows YOUR whole theory out of the water!


Let's not confuse sports with hazing. :)

---
dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

11-23-04 10:44am (new)
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little_kitty
I bop, you bop, a-they bop.

Member Rated:

quote:

My next comment is, given that hockey players wear something akin to straight razors on their feet, why do we see so much punching to the face and so little kicking? It's not like any of them have teeth or brains to injure up there.

Something about death and being charged for assault methinks. But if anyone followed the Canucks last season, Bertuzzi decided to just punch a guy in the head and lo and behold, got kicked out for the rest of the season because apparently he injured him pretty badly. Hooray!

---
Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

11-23-04 10:54am (new)
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MikeyG
Shoots the shit and often misses

Member Rated:

Well, if that is the same incident, kitty, the player who got hit fell on his head and broke his neck.

---
The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.

11-23-04 11:22am (new)
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little_kitty
I bop, you bop, a-they bop.

Member Rated:

Which it is, but I had forgotten that little part of it. I'm doped up on drugs right now (of the perscription persuasion), so details like broken necks kind of... slip.

That and I hate the Canucks. They're a bunch of chumps.

---
Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.

11-23-04 11:51am (new)
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crabby
I have an awesome avatar.

Member Rated:

Fuck those shit eating Canucks!

I was raised to hate the Pistons. However, I felt they were the lesser of two evils last season. I also have a distinct hatred for the Indiana Pacers. I have always been a huge Ron Artest fan since his time spent with the Chicago Bulls. I had the chance to meet him once at a lame ass school thing where he was a speaker. Really nice guy! After he spoke he spent time afterwards signing autographs and talking to the students. But yeah, he's always been a crazy ass.

11-23-04 12:16pm (new)
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