holycrap is the kind of guy who tells you to meet him in the men's room at that Exxon right off of highway 51 and then never shows up and I wind up sitting there all night. It was freezing cold, for goodness sake, and...I mean, holycrap is the kind of guy who would do that, you know, to another guy. Not me. Some other random guy.
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Peeing sitting down is the gift you give yourself.