Confessions of Jesus Christ I by seinfeld_fan_13 3-14-05

You know God, i have to tell you something... Yes i know you died for other peoples sins.... you've said that so many times... No father... What is it? Being born on December 25th made me the youngest kid in my class in school, in daycare, and in university... i was always called a "baby" Yeah it's true, being born on January 1st, i had a lot of control back then... makes me think i had more back then than now...

Confessions of Jesus Christ II by seinfeld_fan_13 3-14-05

You know what God? Dieing on the cross is one thing, and to stay on it for the rest of eternity is another... you're dead! What difference does it make? Thats easy for you to say... your laying on a soft, fluffy cloud right now drinking a martini...im laying on a vertical wooden board with nails in my hands.. What'ya gonnqa do... you actually got to live on earth, and i didn't can i have a sip of that martini please? Over my dead body. Wait...does that make sense?

Confessions of Jesus Christ III by seinfeld_fan_13 3-14-05

God, do you think i need to shave? Well you look like "father time" for one thing... My right arm still hurts from when santa claus hit me... those were the days... no..no that was rudolf... Flasback to 1850... Owww! Sorry...wow! am i that bigger than you?

Confessions of Jesus Christ IV by seinfeld_fan_13 3-15-05

You know what God? There are people who are not catholic, but still go to heaven... Like, what's the point of going to church, because right after you die you're here with me forever in eternity... I think they really care about us son... Ahh... come on... all they want is to be cured of innosence, and they go back to doing bad things again... good point...

Confessions of Jesus Christ V by seinfeld_fan_13 3-17-05

God, please get me some insect repelent, these damn termites have been chewing at my legs for the last 932 years! Go run over to the corner store ya hippie! i can barely move! What are you chicken? Bock, bock, bock! Sorry sir, we only exept american money... Arrgh! Damn Canadian currency! Its never useful, except for those gumball machines..

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You better have liked my comic.

Confessions of Jesus Christ VI by seinfeld_fan_13 3-17-05

Father, didn't i rise from the dead remember? Ya, so what! Then why am i still on this cross? Listen, i dont know and i dont care.hey the paper says that michael jackson at 83 molested 6 more children last week. im gonna give him a beating when he gets up here... isn't he going to hell... naa...there is no hell...

Confessions of Jesus Christ VII by seinfeld_fan_13 3-18-05

What do you mean "There is no hell"? Of coarse there's hell! Where do you think hitler went... and Osama bin laden, and martha stewart will go? huh?! Their spirits stay on earth haunting people...don't worry, the hitler ghost is at the best place it could be... at "Neverland"...or not...

Confessions of Jesus Christ VIII by seinfeld_fan_13 3-18-05

Lord, do you think i ganed a little weight in the past? Ha, ha, ha, ha! You're fat! Like... i tried the subway diet, but it just kept giving me severe cramps Ha, ha, ha, ha! You're so damn lucky i havn't seen you in the past 2000 years! Damn right.... and im loving every moment i can salvage in this life...

Confessions of Jesus Christ IX by seinfeld_fan_13 3-18-05

You're mean! You told me when i was preying to you that you would forgive me after killing my stepmother... now im going to hell thanks to you! see there is a hell! That doesn't mean i wont leave jackson unpunished!

Confessions of Jesus Christ X by seinfeld_fan_13 3-18-05

Michael Jackson? How did you die... Rabies... uh... now i know to never try and rape a chipmunk again... Hey God, im going to heaven right? i dont know yet... just get down on the damn ground, and do the moon walk! but im 83, and i- hey, if you can rape a chipmunk you can do the moonwalk on the ground buddy!

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You better have liked my comic.

Confessions of Jesus Christ XI by seinfeld_fan_13 3-18-05

Ok... so i did a moonwalk upside down, backwards, with stilts, balancing on a paper clip glued to canadian toonies... so now can i go to heaven? hmmmm... no... aww... can i atleast go back to earth... of coarse... you still have 304 trials to attend!... Then you go to hell...

Confessions of Jesus Christ XII by seinfeld_fan_13 3-19-05

Don't you feel like that we wasted our whole lives... of coarse... you lived barely 2 decades, and i never lived on earth... we can put people back on earth, but we can't make "ourselves" go back to earth... wait a minute... is this just a scheme so i would let you off the cross? well... no... fine.. i would of let you down, and we would of lived in earth.. so i guess you really enjoy the cross.. *crunch* mmmm... smoked salmon. Crunchy? What the hell?...

Confessions of Jesus Christ XIII by seinfeld_fan_13 3-19-05

Bye god... it's really starting to snow... it's time i better start to hybernate before the demons try to hammer excessive nails into my hands... Goodnight... mmmmm... big macs... the gift of being in heaven... God have you been listening to me this whole comic series, or are you just an "irresponsible drinker"? A bit of both... I guess the thing about the demons and the nails weren't true, so i dont have to hybernate... *Zzzzz* Uhh boss.. it's not that fun when he's sleeping... you can de-tranqualize the guard to the gate of heaven...

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You better have liked my comic.

Funny stuff, for my attention span some had a bit o dialog, but otherwise i thought it was funny, i like raping chipmunks, alvin simon THEODORE! do do DODODODO

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I dumb :D

from what i read, i enjoyed

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xx( o Y o. )xx

I really like your comics. There's something about them which doesn't really make sense, but always makes me laugh.

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The tongue licking the ars of pretension.