12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

So you excited about meeting this girl you've been talking to on the internet? Yeah, she is a really cool girl. A tad on the chunky side, but she is really fun to talk to. So, it should be fun. Are we talking Whale chunky or just regular chunky. Maybe small cow chunky. Rhino chunky at worst. I don't plan on marrying her. We're just buddies. Thats all. Carry some potatoes around with you for when you break her heart and she starts crying gravy. gravy?

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Hey hows it going? You ready to go to the mall or something? Sounds great! Maybe you could come inside and meet my mom first. This is kind of creepy. Oh, I've heard so much about you! I just wish my husband was here to meet you. Unfortunetly he was shot during a robbery at a grocery store. A couple of uncomfortable hours later..... I mean, was it really necessary for her to show me your dads ashes? I mean she gave me a ziplock bag full to take home with me. She reallllllllly liked you! I'm so excited!

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

At the mall...... This is not going well. Maybe Saul was right. I hope he kisses me. I don't know how to work my way out of this situation. I hope he kisses me. Maybe If I just act like an asshole or something. I hope he kisses me.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

You know you didn't have to buy me $200 dollars worth of crap at the mall. I didn't have to, but I WANTED too. I just feel bad is all. Don't feel bad. I mean we're buddies right? Yeah! Totally! We're buddies. Well maybe we can hang out again next week or something.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

So then she bought me $200 worth of stuff at the mall. It was alright I guess. Dude! Big mistake. Why is that? You gotta fuck her now. Oh, I don't know about all that. I mean she knows we're just buddies. Rhinos have no concept of buddies. She just wants your boner.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

So, what did you wanna do today? Go mini-golfing or something? I figuered we could just sit around here and watch movies or something. My mom is going to bingo later on so we'll be able to just sit and talk. I don't like where this is going. You know it'll be nice to just get to know eachother better. I'M LEGALLY IMPOTENT! I don't like where this is going.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Yeah the only DVD player we have is in my bedroom. Oh ok. Thats cool I guess. You're not impotent! You just don't want to sleep with me. Where did she get that sandwich? Oh no! I'm no good with guilt trips. Look alright! I'm gonna make it easy. No questions asked. I just want your boner. How did she get drunk so fast? DAMN! I'll fuck her. Whats the worst that can happen?

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Oh its so good. Oh god this is a fat pussy. I gotta think of something fast! Oh its so good. Hey! I can't finish with a condom on. Why don't you just suck my dick until I finish? Won't it taste all condomy? Yes.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Yeah, I'm not proud, but I fucked her. DUDE!!!!! Don't worry it didn't count. I didn't finish inside of her. I made her suck my dick. Didn't it taste all condomy? Yes.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Later that month...... So did you like my friends? They were all really excited to meet you. I need a plan fast. They had heard so much about you! They all really like you too! Yeah it was fun. Hey, your friend Lisa was really cute! Would you mind if I asked her out. No. Go right ahead. Why would I care? Where is she pulling these sandwiches from.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

Later that night.... I'll just check my email before bed. YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN DATE MY FRIENDS! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU EVER AGAIN. AND LISA HATES YOU TOO! That was unexpected. Lets check the next message. Hey this is Lisa. I'm really excited about us hanging out. Well, Talk to you soon. Nothing wrong with that! Whats the last one say? I can't hang out with you anymore. Denise just came by my house and punched my aunt.

12 to 04 by crabby 6-28-05

So she totally flipped out and punched her friends aunt. Well hey at least you don't have to deal with her anymore. Yeah I guess. You know other than having really awkward sex one time, she was really fun to hang out with. Yeah, thats kind of sad. You wanna give me her number? You're the one who told me to stay away from the fatties. Yeah, but that was before I know she liked the condom cock.

Masterly. Keep it up, krabby.

Excellent.