Hey, Names Mike. This places kicks the living shit out of Wittycomics which i saw recently, so I decided to throw down a few comics. You couldn't do me a favour and give me a few pointers and what you think of them, could you? Thanks.

Wonder what it said. by Diamorphine 12-12-06

TOBOR shall destroy you and molest your dying corpse!! Yeah... This doesn't usually happen.

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Government Deployment for the Ridding of Noobs (GDRN) by Diamorphine 12-12-06

*l0l u r @ n0ob elohel. I pwnz0rs u. *I wl haxX0r u coz i iz 1337 l0l. *wtf l0l, r u afk? i wl kik ur fat azz u nerd l0l i pwn u.

Government Deployment for the Ridding of Noobs #2 (GDRN) by Diamorphine 12-12-06

And I said 'l0l i kickz ur azz' and he's all like... 'No, i pwnZ ur azz any day at UT l0l. U r prob n0ob at UT l0l'... Hey wait, I haven't finished... Then I said 'l0l u suck.' and...

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WTGL;; You know how it is.. #1 [When Things Get Lonely] by Diamorphine 12-12-06

Arrrrh, what be ye problem shipmate? Well, You see, After years of sailing on yer boat, I'm getting lonely. You know? You eventually start to miss the sex.. Arrrrrh... Well, You know, many of our shipmates had the same problem. I suggested 'dropping the soap.' With a knife that big, I swear you'd be great.. Killing you will feel sooo good.

WTGL;; That Big is Magical #2 by Diamorphine 12-12-06

So, you say your a magical sharkman, eh? Aye, That be correct. Can ye prove it? Aye, I have a picture that can prove just how magical I am! ... This doesn't look like anything magical... Wait... That isn't a... 'you know'... Is it? Two Page Special.

[Click to view comic: 'WTGL;; Love is blind. #3']
[Click to view comic: 'WTGL;; It's all coming back... #4']

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AI is mans way of saying: 'l0l i pLayz g0d r0flz0rz.'

they're not horrible...

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Kill Whitey.

  Your comics are very well written:  concise and easy to understand with good flow.  Unfortunatley, the jokes themselves are, for the most part, shit.

 Your first two comics are exceptions.  While TOBOR jokes are the comedic equivalent of the green fuzzy meat you find in the back of the refrigerator, that one was pretty good.  It didn't need the TOBOR reference at all.

The first government deployment one was good, too... because it was so well-written.

The rest ranged from confusing to stupid.

 Read and watch some funny stuff so you can get a grasp on what is and isn't funny.  Also remember to read each of your comics as if you were seeing it for the first time; your readers won't be able to get inside your head and figure out your intent.

I think you have potential; keep trying. 

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

The Gov't deployment ones struck a special chord. *taps chest with fist*

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the kid's getting old, the kid's getting old

first : fantastic introduction. this is more of what i love to see around here. n00bs with humility and poise.

second : while some may not care for your delivery or style i find it interesting. the only thing lacking is a bit of humor. there's an old acting book called "an actor prepares" that talks about "showing rather than telling" - take that advice to heart.

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Our liability coverage is zero. Our balls however are enormous.

I liked your first comic. It really breathes life into a dying genre of strips. The ever ailing TOBOR genre.

Good profile too.

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It's grime time.

You're getting there.  It takes 20 real shit comics to move into 30 really mediocre ones, and finally into hundreds of good ones.  From what I've read you've managed to start in the mediocre range as far as execution, but I see you really developing as a stripper sooner than later.