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DJVicarious
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

I'm new on the site and I just wanted some advice on my first two comics. 

 

 

[Click to view comic: 'Everyone's already thinking it...'] " />

 [Click to view comic: 'If you're dating a guy named Butch...'] " />

9-22-07 5:16pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


lildeucecoup
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

The first thing you should do is get rid of that annoying "border=0>"

 You can do this by just pasting in the url of the comic and leaving out the [img] brackets all together.

---
You don't know what I got... .

9-22-07 5:18pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


AngryAmerican
Here at least 3 times a year

Member Rated:

i like the first one simply for your use of the beer drinking slob as rosie o'donnell.

and i agree, she needs to die.

---
Kill Whitey.

9-23-07 12:40am (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


DJVicarious
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

So, thanks for the comments so far. Is there anything I need to improve on so far?

9-24-07 7:56am (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


not_Scyess
not laughing with you

Member Rated:

In the second comic, your dialog needs to be a little more believeable.  I don't think anyone would really answer this:

Really? Then what would be the way to... "win" her heart?

 with this:

Well, legends always talk about a woman falling in love with a man after being struck by Cupid's arrow...

So it sounds like your forcing the set-up to support the punchline.  Try to make the speech flow more naturally and you've got a funny comic there.

---
peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

9-24-07 8:03am (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


DJVicarious
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Okay, I see what you mean. Thanks for that.

9-25-07 1:42pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


Wilbur
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

The first one's really good. Make more.

---
hi

10-02-07 2:08pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info

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