A couple of problems here.
1) Gabe is thinking in the first panel, how does the old lady hear him? Also he thinks nothing except 'My GF just dumped me', he never mentions feeling like a loser. She just assumes he feels like a loser?
These are minor points. Practice in execution will get you past them
2) The big problem: no one knows what the fuck you're talking about. If you're so hyper-intelligent that only 10 people on the planet can understand you, then only 10 people on the planet will enjoy your work.
Try some subject matter that isn't so esoteric.
Keep at it. You show promise!
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Kill Whitey.
