As the creator of a measly 7 strips (but in a hour's period, mind) I get the feeling that I haven't yet merited the divine right to post freely to the bulletin board. How many more thousand do I need to make before I'm allowed back to play? Any help and guidance appreciated.

To enter this forum free, you must answer me these questions three:

- What is your name?

- What is your mission?

- What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Your forum-status is affected by your comic scores. Your postings to the forum will be ignored until you have written three or more strips which have been marked lambent orange or better, however they will not be replied to if your strips have totalled more than ten blue or green demerits, unless those demerits are triangular, in which case it requires only seven. For strips rating between lambent orange and vacuous cheese, with less than the maximum blue or gren demerits, regardless of shape, they will be read but not replied to. Above vacious cheese, up to but not including molten linoleum, or as low as lambent orange but including at least eight circular merits of colour ranging from yellow to brown, your postings will be read, and replied to by a number of readers equalling ten minus the total number of demerits you have received, regardless of colour or shape.

I hope this makes it all clear for you.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Nobody here has a clue.

I do not have a bloody clue.

My advantage is that I realise that I do not have a clue, but I am looking.

Rock on, don't suck.

Love,
bunner

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

Here are some more rules:

- You must make at least one comic about how much I suck. The person who makes the most comics about how much I suck becomes President of the Message Boards. Unfortunately, that position is likely to be filled for quite some time by President-For-Life and Chief Executive Oboe-waxer Gabe Billings.

- You must take an inside or running joke, like Tobor or the "All your base are belong to us" thing, and drive it into the ground until every remotely funny drop has been wrung from it. Then, post a few more.

- Everyone who posts here has to blow me. I can schedule you for Tuesday evening if that's convenient for you.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

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As the creator of a measly 7 strips (but in a hour's period, mind) I get the feeling that I haven't yet merited the divine right to post freely to the bulletin board. How many more thousand do I need to make before I'm allowed back to play? Any help and guidance appreciated.

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Uh, err, most of you lost me there...

But the cheese stuff - that was crystal clear. I know where I stand now.

Thengyew.

Oh and Gabe, I permanently walk around with a "kick me" sign on my back. It makes life more exciting.

Andy

quote:

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To enter this forum free, you must answer me these questions three:

- What is your name?

- What is your mission?

- What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

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quote:

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To enter this forum free, you must answer me these questions three:

- What is your name?

- What is your mission?

- What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

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Thanks for clearing that up, "Ni"-boy.

BUT NOT REALLY

TEDA,

I just took a look at your comics. They are truly disturbing. Rock on.

I found this one particularly appalling and yet appealing...

[Click to view comic: 'Garrison Keeler's little known blue act']

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

It's funny because it's true.

I am not the Messiah! Now fuck off!

Love,
bunner

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

LALALALALALA. I am not listening to bunner, I am not listening to bunner. LALALALALA.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

The Strip Creator Newbie's Guide to Making In-Jokes in Four Easy Lessons

1. wirthling fucks donkeys.

2. gabe_billings is a colossal geek who gets all hot and bothered at the thought of bar graphs and other statistical paraphernalia. Also, he looks like Steve Austin.

3. ObiJo is being pursued by Red Robot, who wants to kill him. Also, he and gabe have some sort of rivalry going on, if either of them were industrious enough to do anything about it.

4. See this thread for a quick education in the "one-note characters". Also, don't forget Tobor. All you need to know about him is that he will cornhole you.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

You make it sound so cheap. I prefer the phrase "wirthling piledrives asses."

Gabe looks nothing like the Bionic Man. He looks more like that Stone Cold Whatshisname, the wrestler guy...

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

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BLASPHEMY! YE GAWDS!!!

- What is your mission?

Is actually

"What is your quest?"

Huggers
Jael aka Doctress Python Pedantic

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Erm..........

....

.....

.......

Monty Python quotations?

Are you people OK in the head? Don't you know that quoting anything humorous and successful is tantamount to saying you are humorless and unsuccessful. And gay. Don't you? Don't you??

Oh you do, ok.

So is using the word "tantamount" in a public post.

...oops

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"Old" is the old new.

quote:

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Also, where does the name Jael come from, uh, Jael? I just saw the name in a book I'm reading, but can't remember having seen it otherwise so was wondering.

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I'd love to hear that hymnal some time:

Sisera was on the run
His feet felt like they weighed a ton
So he stopped in a tent
Then Jael did vent
His temple with a camping implement.

Chorus:

Dead dead dead dead
Dead dead dead dead
He's REALLY dead.

Etc, etc.

If Quentin Terentino made a movie about the bible it would be an hour and a half of that Jael story and like 3 minutes of everything else.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Like anyone but Obijo cares: here's the literal:

The Book of Judges

Chapter 5
1 Then sang Deborah and Barak the son of Abinoam on that day, saying,

6 In the days of Shamgar the son of Anath, in the days of Jael, the highways were unoccupied, and the travellers walked through byways
*snip*

24 Blessed above women shall Jael the wife of Heber the Kenite be, blessed shall she be above women in the tent.
25 He asked water, and she gave him milk; she brought forth butter in a lordly dish.
26 She put her hand to the nail, and her right hand to the workmen's hammer; and with the hammer she smote Sisera, she smote off his head, when she had pierced and stricken through his temples.
27 At her feet he bowed, he fell, he lay down: at her feet he bowed, he fell: where he bowed, there he fell down dead.
28 The mother of Sisera looked out at a window, and cried through the lattice, Why is his chariot so long in coming? why tarry the wheels of his chariots?
29 Her wise ladies answered her, yea, she returned answer to herself,
30 Have they not sped? have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two; to Sisera a prey of diverse colors, a prey of divers colors of needlework, of diverse colors of needlework on both sides, meet for the necks of them that take the spoil?
31 So let all thine enemies perish, O LORD: but let them that love him be as the sun when he goeth forth in his might. And the land had rest forty years.
Kinda wordy lyrics, but the beat just gets me moving Dick. Now I just need to find a man to smite through the temple, and I'll get 40 years and there will be peace on earth for 40 years lol

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Women are fisher's of men because we all know.... The small ones you throw back. The medium ones you eat. The large ones you mount.

Hahaha. That's my favorite line. Damn right she's blessed above all women in the tent. Or the hardware store, I'm guessing.

As for finding a man and smiting him through the temple, I was gonna post that old trephination picture that boorite scared me with. But, since I still wet myself when I see it, I decided not too.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.