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Stripcreator » Read My Damn Comics » I'm new here and i'd like someone to read my comic

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Yoshimitsu85
Stripcreator Newbie

Hi, I just wanted to get some input. Now, the title MAY be offensive, but I really meant nothing by it, so there really is no reason for anyone to be offended.

The Comic

Link is above.

Also, keep in mind that this is the first in a series I a plan to do.

---
France 1940: The Board Game How fast can YOU surrender?

4-16-03 8:20pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info


Nofear
Stripcreator Newbie

well i think they are great, but i am also new here:)

4-17-03 4:30am (new)
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evil_d
Riding through your town with his head on fire

Member Rated:

I wasn't offended, but I wasn't very entertained either. I think most of the jokes fall flat. You spend too much time on the set-up and then the punchline isn't worth it. Don't force your jokes to fill three panels if they're not that complex. If you have two jokes you can tell in one and a half panels each, then put them both into one strip. Or experiment with the "black", "splitter", and "blacker" backgrounds to simulate having more or less than three panels in your strip.

Also, learn the difference between "heroine" and "heroin".

With a little work I think you can become a decent writer. Welcome to Stripcreator.

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The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

4-17-03 8:56am (new)
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not_Scyess
not laughing with you

Member Rated:

I agree with evil_d, although I think I liked your comics more than he did. They weren't anything to write home about, but I liked them. I really liked this one
[Click to view comic: 'Stick Guy and Black Guy #3']
so much I wrote home about it.

I think what _d was talking about is best exemplified in this comic:

[Click to view comic: 'Stick Guy and Black Guy #2']

which would've been funnier if what Black Guy was saying wasn't just the same stuff that built up to the punchline (which had already passed). He should be saying something funny, or nothing at all.

But otherwise, your comics are pretty good. Yay!

---
peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

4-17-03 9:04am (new)
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Yoshimitsu85
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Alright, I REALLY appreciate the input. I thank you all for any positive comments. Also, thank you for the tips evil_d...I was forcing the punchlines. I found myself staring at my screen trying to figure out what to make them say.

I hope you guys will not forget me and perhas continue to check my comics...I feel that I can do better.

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France 1940: The Board Game How fast can YOU surrender?

4-17-03 5:37pm (new)
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not_Scyess
not laughing with you

Member Rated:

Ganbatte, Yoshimitsu-kun!!!!!!

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

4-18-03 7:45am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Perhaps this is harsh but I want to use it.

4-18-03 8:09am (new)
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naz_ghul
Member - Tobor Fan Club

Member Rated:

Yoshimitsu85 - The good thing is that, even though your punchlines need some refinement, I can see where you're going with most of them. If you stick with it, I think you'll improve. Glad to have you around.

---
The woman said, "Sir, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill replied "madame, if you were my wife, I'd drink it.

4-18-03 8:55am (new)
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boinky33
I'm with stupid ^

Member Rated:






























hahahahahaha.....poop!!!!!!

4-18-03 12:48pm (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

haha... that's funnier than anyones comics!

oops

4-18-03 2:53pm (new)
quote : comics : pm : info

Stripcreator » Read My Damn Comics » I'm new here and i'd like someone to read my comic


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