Look everyone! I done made a series. Fifteen parts. One joke. See if you can spot it!

Ice-capades!!! Part 1 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

Mwahahaha! There it is, Earth, ripe for the conquest! Soon the planet will be an icy wasteland, and I, Gunther von Eis, shall reign supreme! So what's the plan, boss? I must freeze the planet before we land because, as you know, the slightest bit of heat may well cause my gruesome demise. I was wondering about that bit. If you can't handle heat, why did you hire a fire breathing dragon as your right hand man? Um, well... It's because you're very very stupid, isn't it?

Ice-capades!!! Part 2 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

So, boss. How do you plan to freeze the earth so you are able to set foot on its surface without burning up in a grotesque fashion due to your terrible vunerability to heat? I dunno yet. I was going to plan that part over dinner. Fancy a curry? A curry? Yeah. A really hot one. Is that wise, boss? Ooh! And we could get those cocktails that they set fire to!

Ice-capades!!! Part 3 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

Look, bitch. I don't care if your boyfriend is a fucking rock star. I'm a fucking wizard. If I wanted I could magic myself into any fucking band I wanted. Please, mister, just leave me alone. My boyfriend will be back in a minute. Actually, that would be pretty fucking cool. I could be in Abba, or Queen, or even Culture Club! And - what the fuck? I knew she was frigid, but this is just fucking stupid.

Ice-capades!!! Part 4 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

Boss! Your freeze ray worked! Excellent, now all we have to do is increase the power, and this whole pitiful planet will cower under my icy grip. Increase the power? Don't worry, it's no problem at all. All I have to do is raise the temperature in the boiler. Is that not a bit ricky, on account of you being made of ice? Naaah, I'll be fine. All it needs is a few more buckets of petrol thrown on and a quick blast with the flamethrower.

Ice-capades!!! Part 5 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

So anyway, I'm going to form the best fucking band in the world, and I want you to be the groupie. You in? Back off sweaty, I've got mace. Hold on- what's that noise? What the fuck? It'd better warm up soon, I'm suffering shrinkage here.

Ice-capades!!! Part 6 by kramer_vs_kramer 4-30-03

This icy wasteland is shit. All the girls have either frozen to death or are wearing big padded jackets. KNEEL BEFORE YOUR NEW RULER, EARTHLING! Who the fuck are you? I am the mighty Gunther von Eis! You will revere me as your new god or face the dire consequences! So you're behind all this snow and shit? I aught to kick your ass. Don't mess with me, pal. I've got napalm.

Ice-capades!!! Part 7 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-01-03

So, you're just a shit rip-off of Mr Freeze from the Batman comics, then. No, not at all. I'm very much my own man. Let's see, you're a frozen evil genius who plots to freeze the world. You're a complete fucking copy! I'm not taking this shit from the likes of you. I'm out of here. So, who's next? The Joke-man? Catlady? The fucking Riddlist?

Ice-capades!!! Part 8 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-01-03

What's the matter, boss? You look upset. Some cheeky bastard dissed me. He said I was a third rate rip-off of a crap Batman villain. Want me to sort him out, boss? I could roast his scrawny ass for you. Yes. Yes, you do that. Cheer up, boss! Everything's going to plan. Once I take this punk out we can send the ice-bots in and begin your invasion. Whatever. I'm too depressed to think about it just now. If anyone wants me I'll be in the sauna.

Ice-capades!!! Part 9 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-01-03

Okay, pal. You've insulted my boss for the last time. Eat flame breath! A dragon? What the fuck kind of ice villain has a dragon as a henchman? You know, I've asked him that so many times, and he always changes the subject. It can't be safe, having you about. One sneeze and he's like fucking Dr Melty. Tell me about it! And don't get me started on him and his sunbeds...

Ice-capades!!! Part 10 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-01-03

Let's fight, then. I have to warn you- I'm a fucking master wizard. I could turn you into a chimp or something. I'm a giant firebreathing super strong reptile. Ah. And did I mention the claws? And the razor-sharp teeth? Dammit! I really wanted to be a chimp.

Ice-capades!!! Part 11 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-01-03

Hello, boss? That guy got away. What's that? Yeah, he ran off. He's hiding in the snow somewhere. I think. Huh? Look, I can't really hear you. You're going to have to switch off the hairdryer.

Ice-capades!!! Part 12 by kramer_vs_kramer 5-02-03

Pah! That moronic reptile can't even beat one puny human. Ice-bot, it's up to you. "ENVIRONMENT ERROR /ARK/BIN/ETC/ PID 121131" Huh? You're broken AGAIN? "MODULE FAILURE IN /ARK/LEG/CLAW/ 123421" Hold on, I'll get the blowtorch.

Ice-capades!!! Part 13 by kramer_vs_kramer 6-03-03

You're a brave man, luring me out for a fight like this. Don't be so cocky, cornetto-boy. Watch this: melt-o-fucking-riffic! Nooo! You have lured me here, to the Sahara, and then magically melted all my beautiful ice! I'm done for! Fucking right, Magnum. You could say you've had your "just deserts". Aaagh! This is more heat than I can "sand"! Shut the fuck up. I won, I get to do the puns.

Ice-capades!!! Part 14 by kramer_vs_kramer 6-03-03

Aaaagghhhh! I'm melting!!! I'm MELTING!!!! Bloody hell, it's fucking hot. I wonder where all the bikini birds are. I'M MEEELLLTTTIIING! I just saved the world, I reckon I could probably get a shag for that. Okay, I'm done melting. It's clobbering time! Shit.

Ice-capades!!! Part 15 by kramer_vs_kramer 6-03-03

What the fuck? You're an ice villain, I melted you. Why the fuck are you still here? I wasn't specifically an ice villain. I'm a villain, who was formerly a bit cold. What? That's just stupid. Fuck off. Okay, you win this time. But I'm warning you- I'll be back! As what? The slightly warm human torch? A water villain who's a bit damp? Dr Gusty - the master of moderate weather coinditions? If only I had a pen and a bit of paper...

*applause*

I read this series a while ago, but nice to see you added a few more comics to it.

Great.

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Dad was flammable

I missed parts 1-13.
But it was good entertaining stuff. Did you read any Captain Adequate for the last strips or was that coincidence?

More...

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

I liked 'em, pretty much. Yay for you.

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peddling the funny around since 09/24/2002

Very well done--my favourite was #8.

I liked the fact that each strip had a set-up and punchline. I tend to ignore most series strips here because they tend to ramble on too long and the payoffs are rarely worth the investment in time.